March 1st, 2008, 05:08 PM
I couldn't find a way to post it here without destroying the format so I'll just link it.
March 21st, 2008, 04:14 PM
You should watch the syllables in each line. They're very important in having a good rhythm to your poem.
This should be taken into consideration.
The wording was pretty natural. Now Chess is not my favorite game, but I admire anyone who can regularly play it. Again, syllables are quite important, and that makes it all the more catchy and interesting. Not bad, good job.