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Ársa
March 27th, 2008, 03:23 AM
Ever heard something in the English language that made you think...wha? Try these:

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Why is abbreviated such a long word?

Doctors call what they do..."Practice"? (>_>)

If a turtle loses its shell, is it naked or homeless?

If Vegetarians eat Vegetables, what do Humanitarians eat?

Why don't you ever see the headling "Psychic wins Lottery"?

Why is the man who invests your money called a "broker"?

If con is the opposite of pro, then is Congress the opposite of Progress?

If flying is so safe, then why is the airport called "Terminal"?

What's another word for "Synonym"?

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Have you heard any others?

~T_S

Tetsu
March 27th, 2008, 04:04 AM
Yay! The perfect opportunity to ruin the joke by flexing my brain muscle.

Why is abbreviated such a long word? - It's Latin, which combines words

Doctors call what they do..."Practice"? (>_>) - Definition: condition arrived at by experience or exercise

If a turtle loses its shell, is it naked or homeless? - A turtle's shell is not actually its home. It is a defense mechanism. Turtles usually make their 'homes' in rocks, the seabed, or holes in the shore. Therefore, it can be considered 'naked'.

If Vegetarians eat Vegetables, what do Humanitarians eat? - Anything they want.

Why don't you ever see the headline "Psychic wins Lottery"? - This has many explanations. Some more common ones are that psychics aren't actually psychic, or in many denominations of various religions, psychics are puppets for demons. There are too many to list here.

Why is the man who invests your money called a "broker"? - It is a misnomer.

If con is the opposite of pro, then is Congress the opposite of Progress? - No. Antonyms of Progress include retreat, regression, return, deteriorate, regress, abstain, cease, discontinue, forbear, halt, hesitate, inaction, refrain, stop, etc. (Taken from research on thesaurus.reference.com)

If flying is so safe, then why is the airport called "Terminal"? - Definition: situated at or forming the end or extremity of something. An airport terminal marks the end of a flight.

What's another word for "Synonym"? - Taken from thesaurus.reference.com: Adequation, agreement, alikeness, compatability, conformity, correlation, correspondence, equality, eveness, exchangeability, identity, interchangeability, interchangableness, likeness, match, par, parallel, parity, similarity, synonym, synonymy.

♥vampy©valentine♥
March 27th, 2008, 04:12 AM
sorry i just have to say this ... if quizs are quizical then what a re tests ? :L :L

Ársa
March 27th, 2008, 04:18 AM
Yay! The perfect opportunity to ruin the joke by flexing my brain muscle.

Why is abbreviated such a long word? - It's Latin, which combines words

Doctors call what they do..."Practice"? (>_>) - Definition: condition arrived at by experience or exercise

If a turtle loses its shell, is it naked or homeless? - A turtle's shell is not actually its home. It is a defense mechanism. Turtles usually make their 'homes' in rocks, the seabed, or holes in the shore. Therefore, it can be considered 'naked'.

If Vegetarians eat Vegetables, what do Humanitarians eat? - Anything they want.

Why don't you ever see the headline "Psychic wins Lottery"? - This has many explanations. Some more common ones are that psychics aren't actually psychic, or in many denominations of various religions, psychics are puppets for demons. There are too many to list here.

Why is the man who invests your money called a "broker"? - It is a misnomer.

If con is the opposite of pro, then is Congress the opposite of Progress? - No. Antonyms of Progress include retreat, regression, return, deteriorate, regress, abstain, cease, discontinue, forbear, halt, hesitate, inaction, refrain, stop, etc. (Taken from research on thesaurus.reference.com)

If flying is so safe, then why is the airport called "Terminal"? - Definition: situated at or forming the end or extremity of something. An airport terminal marks the end of a flight.

What's another word for "Synonym"? - Taken from thesaurus.reference.com: Adequation, agreement, alikeness, compatability, conformity, correlation, correspondence, equality, eveness, exchangeability, identity, interchangeability, interchangableness, likeness, match, par, parallel, parity, similarity, synonym, synonymy.

Think all you want...This wasn't meant to be taken seriously. As for your "Synonym" experiment, I can only see a few that should actually fit the argument.

But yes, well done on...w/e you did. :P

~T_S

Avey
March 27th, 2008, 04:32 AM
sorry i just have to say this ... if quizs are quizical then what a re tests ? :L :L

No, dude. That's not cool. An innocent poster could post the answer to that unaware of the chaos that it would create.

Gerri Shin
March 27th, 2008, 08:17 AM
sorry i just have to say this ... if quizs are quizical then what a re tests ? :L :L

Here's the answer! Tests Are..... A Nuisance! :D

Cassino
March 27th, 2008, 03:51 PM
sorry i just have to say this ... if quizs are quizical then what a re tests ? :L :L
They're testing.
... Wow... Avoided that one before even understanding the joke. xD

Revendusman
March 27th, 2008, 11:16 PM
Stop cutting fown the table... your language sucks!

hAR isnt thta funny(I'm Mongolian by the way)

El Gofre
March 28th, 2008, 04:23 AM
Ooh ooh i have one:
If olive oil is made of olives, and vegetable is made of vegetables, what is baby oil made of????
Oh and Revend, if out language sucks so much why bother learning it? Hypocrite

BakingBluePotatoe
March 30th, 2008, 11:05 PM
hm...

Why do you park your car in a driveway and drive on a parkway? o_O

Here's the answer! Tests Are..... A Nuisance! :D

nice save there, Gerri! :p

Anxiety.
April 2nd, 2008, 07:59 PM
hm...

Why do you park your car in a driveway and drive on a parkway? o_O



nice save there, Gerri! :p

I thought it was called a road? Just kidding! I didn't know it was called a parkway though... yes, I is stupid.

Er, don't think I actually have any. Wait, let me think (Back to brainic 'things that make you go 'hmmm') Er...

What was the best thing before sliced bread?

Why do hot dogs come 10 to a package and hot dog buns only 8?

Why do tourists go to the tops of tall buildings and then put money into telescopes so they can see things on the ground close-up?

If the police arrest a mime, do they tell him he has the right to remain silent?

Just a few from this site I found. So no, I did not think those up.

Also Can I just say...
If a quiz is quizzical than a test is testiful.
Hehehe...

XxZer0xX
April 4th, 2008, 07:55 AM
hm...

Why do you park your car in a driveway and drive on a parkway? o_O Because people are stupid and don't know what to name things before they do something with it.



nice save there, Gerri! :p


I thought it was called a road? Just kidding! I didn't know it was called a parkway though... yes, I is stupid.

Er, don't think I actually have any. Wait, let me think (Back to brainic 'things that make you go 'hmmm') Er...

What was the best thing before sliced bread? Loaves of bread.

Why do hot dogs come 10 to a package and hot dog buns only 8? Because packagers don't know how to count.

Why do tourists go to the tops of tall buildings and then put money into telescopes so they can see things on the ground close-up?

If the police arrest a mime, do they tell him he has the right to remain silent? Police have to no matter how stupid it seems.

Just a few from this site I found. So no, I did not think those up.

Also Can I just say...
If a quiz is quizzical than a test is testiful.
Hehehe...
Put all my answers in bold.

They say practice makes perfect, but nobody's perfect, so why practice?

peirateis
April 4th, 2008, 01:03 PM
¿Por qué es que el pizza llega a su casa más rápida que la policía?

Oh wait, the English language? Damn...

Gummy
April 4th, 2008, 01:12 PM
¿Por qué es que el pizza llega a su casa más rápida que la policía?
Why is it that the pizza comes to his house more rapid than the police?

Oh wait, the English language? Damn...
Because the Pizza guy is angry at the police for spending all his money at Dunkin' Donuts.

Joey the Cockroach
April 4th, 2008, 01:42 PM
What was the best thing BEFORE sliced bread?

the only one i can think of.

adventure
April 5th, 2008, 05:40 AM
What was the best thing BEFORE sliced bread?

the only one i can think of.

.... I really don't get that.......... what's funny? Is it a pun? Help... XD [/Swede]

Joey the Cockroach
April 5th, 2008, 08:13 AM
people always used to say "the best thing since sliced bread" and what i am saying is, "what was best thing before sliced bread".
actually a pun.

ShinyDialga
April 5th, 2008, 09:57 AM
if your Down under in Australia, how come you dont fall, or arent underground?

this was all i could think of

Joey the Cockroach
April 5th, 2008, 12:56 PM
thats a good one. might be because it is the country that is furthest south apart from Antarctica. maybe becaue the place is hot? i dont know.

XxZer0xX
April 5th, 2008, 08:10 PM
Put all my answers in bold.

They say practice makes perfect, but nobody's perfect, so why practice?
Huh. Nobody answered my question.

Anxiety.
April 10th, 2008, 10:32 AM
Put all my answers in bold.

They say practice makes perfect, but nobody's perfect, so why practice?

Because people want us get as close to perfect as possible... I think.
But I don't like practice so... hehehe... I just got out of practicing my Trumpet, thankyou xD

Offtopic
OMG ON MY PC THE CILIT BANG REMIX CAME ON lmao AND NOW WERE TAKING THE HOBITS TO ISENGARD REMIX lmao.. I have the best songs xD

Jesus Freak Josh
April 11th, 2008, 12:06 AM
Why is it that we never call America the land down under?

Why is it called a building if it's completed?

If a laptop, which you type on, is a notebook, than what does that make a PDA, which you can use the touch-screen to write on?

Do bass play in treble, alto or bass?

Unlimited NiGHTS
April 11th, 2008, 02:04 AM
Why call it "root beer" if you can't get drunk from drinking too much of it? :P

austin00081
April 17th, 2008, 03:16 PM
I love oxymoron's.
But I can't think of any.

Acrutheo
April 28th, 2008, 07:38 PM
One I heard a couple of years ago was: "If knowledge is power and power is corrupt and corrupt is bad, does that make knowledge bad?"

~Poke~
April 29th, 2008, 01:56 PM
thats a good one. might be because it is the country that is furthest south apart from Antarctica. maybe becaue the place is hot? i dont know.

Sorry but, as an Aussie (go me!) I just have to say this: our country is on the bottom of the world (well pretty close) so we are Under the rest of the world.

Alakazam17
April 29th, 2008, 02:13 PM
Why call it "root beer" if you can't get drunk from drinking too much of it? :P Because it has foam like beer, XD. Most of the time when you see people with "beer" on television, it's actually root beer. Same thing with Ginger Ale and Champagne; they just act similar to one another. =O

Is Canada in North America, or north of America? And under that definition wouldn't Mexico be in South America? XD