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Jak
May 26th, 2008, 11:59 AM
Why did I write for 08? 2010 all the way, baby!

Avey
May 31st, 2008, 03:19 PM
I quite like it, but just one thing:


So let it be known,
The grand and the great
The wonder that is
The Class of 2008


Why don't you change that to:


So let it be known,
The grand and the great
The wonder that is
The Class of '08


That way the tempo flows the whole way through the poem and it doesn't hit a dead end at the bottom. Otherwise, good work, I pciked up a really fast sort of pace from that.

armii8877
May 31st, 2008, 03:38 PM
^ I Agree with him It does flow better than

Jak
May 31st, 2008, 05:00 PM
That way the tempo flows the whole way through the poem and it doesn't hit a dead end at the bottom. Otherwise, good work, I pciked up a really fast sort of pace from that.

Thanks, Oni. ^^ I guess I'll add that into my '09 poem, too....when I post it.

LipstickTraces
June 2nd, 2008, 07:31 AM
This poem makes me imagine something you'd see in a film, where a bunch of close school/college friends are gathered together with their drinks in hand with spirits high. It gives the feel of a collective group, and because it flows so well and is directly to the point it makes you feel good when you read it :) its a thorough piece, well executed and theres nothing much you could change to improve it. Well done :D *thumbs up*