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flight
March 4th, 2009, 07:13 PM
I had just written this a few minutes ago because I was feeling sort of thoughtful. Anyway, I hope you guys like it and all. ^^ I'll tell what the poem is about later(if you're confused about what it's about and all), because if it say it now, it'll just ruin the whole mood, right? XD

Anyway, yeah.

-----------------


It was just a dream
How I got chased by hordes of hungry wolves and dogs
So ferocious, yet so uncontrolled
They had cornered me.


It was all but just a dream
Because it felt all too real
As I was busy being torn apart by my own
It was all because of me

I had to come to the sad realization that the more I moved
The more I was ripped
And the more pain I was feeling
I was slowly going to become no more.

I had to face the facts
I was done for
And yet as I was eaten
I was still able to sense my own existence

This is when I realized my own position
My own standing
My own mission
It felt all too real

Here I am, lost in the emptiness of mind
Like space with no time
Here to think about my own actions
And how I could redeem; because everything is not as it seems.

I made a promise to myself to become me once more
A promise I will never break
And thus will never lead to negative emotion being felt
And a pain that will never wake.

So here I am, in my own room
Ready to start my day
Because I realized the wrong that I’ve done
And I came to; and knew that it was all just a dream.

-----------------

Dixie Kong
March 4th, 2009, 08:09 PM
Was I the wolf chasing you?

I like it. Makes me wish I could wake up from things. But you gotta show more stuff. You're a great writer.

Feathing
March 5th, 2009, 09:03 AM
I had to face the facts
I was done for
And yet as I was eaten
I was still able to sense my own existence


This is when I realized my own position
My own standing
My own mission
It felt all too real

Here I am, lost in the emptiness of mind
Like space with no time
Here to think about my own actions
And how I could redeem; because everything is not as it seems.

I made a promise to myself to become me once more
A promise I will never break





This were the parts that most impressed me. It's just so deep. And you can read it from different views.
It's wonderful.

And yes, would be interesting to know your meaning...

Cold Fusion
March 5th, 2009, 01:32 PM
Awesome! I love it, pleases write more! :)

kissing. raindrops
March 5th, 2009, 06:18 PM
You already know my opinion. I like it lots. It has a deep feeling to it.

BHwolfgang
March 5th, 2009, 06:30 PM
Well, I think it's a good one.

However, I'm still confused on what the poem means. Is there something hidden in the words that I have not encrypted?

flight
March 6th, 2009, 08:29 PM
It's hidden.

Basically that poems says that the more negative emotion you're feeling, the more you're tearing yourself apart. The wolves and dogs could be either people you know or your emotions. The point is that your negativity is blinding you, and therefore causing more pain. The more you resist, the more pain you feel. And slowly but surely, you'll become nothing but consumed by negativity until you are once able to see clearly past your wrong once again, and that's when you will wake up and see the clarity of it all.

ShadowLeader
April 3rd, 2009, 03:00 AM
it gave me chills....thats a rare thing.....trust me its only happened twice before......the depth in which you were speaking is truly powerful.....you write like someone of years of suffering and pain......but maybe thats all just a coincidence.....or maybe not....keep on writing so i can see!:D