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Lamzula
September 6th, 2009, 02:42 PM
~Pikacu~

yellow montrosity

is a a pika-chi

i love my pika pika pika cuuu more then a haunter goes boo

so ill choose you my little lovely pikacu

-Liam aka Lamzula

Neutrino
September 7th, 2009, 02:52 AM
This made no sense. I didn't even get any of it, other than the fact that there's a Pikachu and a Haunter involved. Personally, I count it as spam. It isn't really a poem, there's nothing too it, it's way too short. It looks like something you've conjured up in the reply box, and hit the 'make thread' button.

Try making a proper poem, with rhymes and whatnot, make it actually about a pikachu, and add something too it. I'm thinking you should request this thread to be closed until you've gotten it sorted out.

Redstar
September 7th, 2009, 09:59 PM
Try making a proper poem, with rhymes and whatnot, make it actually about a pikachu, and add something too it. I'm thinking you should request this thread to be closed until you've gotten it sorted out.
I wont go so far as to say there's no such thing as "proper" poems, but there are poems in which rhyming isn't needed. A certain terse alliteration of ideas and sounds are typical of all poems, rhyming or not, but going so far as to demand rhyming seems adverse to the entire point of poetry.

I rather enjoyed it. It was cute, to the point, and I definitely like the word "boo". There are some contradictory qualities applied to Pikachu, but not much that a little re-write couldn't fix. Hope to see more from you.

Neutrino
September 8th, 2009, 12:08 PM
I never said that. I said I noticed a rather pathetic excuse or attempt at rhyme in there, and I'm not sad to say it didn't really work. I pretty much know quite a lot about the structure of poems, you'd think I know that they don't always rhyme, duh.

Redstar
September 8th, 2009, 01:52 PM
Try making a proper poem, with rhymes and whatnot, make it actually about a pikachu, and add something too it. I'm thinking you should request this thread to be closed until you've gotten it sorted out.
I didn't realize you were so well acquainted with poetry. You did say that "proper" poems have rhymes, as quoted above, so that could confused anyone. In the future I'll be sure to let posts dangerously close to flaming stand over my friendly, constructive posts as long as that person has credentials like you clearly do. Thanks for the explanation. =D

chibi-helen
September 8th, 2009, 05:42 PM
It's cute and all. Could have been better though, just something that does not seem right

Astinus
September 8th, 2009, 07:04 PM
In the future I'll be sure to let posts dangerously close to flaming stand over my friendly, constructive posts as long as that person has credentials like you clearly do. Thanks for the explanation. =D
That post by Ditto-Jelly wasn't close to flaming at all. He was harsh, yes, but not anywhere close to the "flaming" mentality. (Unless you count the "believe it is the only valid opinion" part of the Wiki'd definition, but...)

Anyhow, Ditto-Jelly does have a point in the fact that this thread needs a lot of improvement. It's pure nonsense that the reader can't even begin to make sense of. Heck, the proper spelling of "Pikachu" is sacrificed to make a rhyme scheme, and that just serves to confuse the reader even more.

Besides, this thread is getting off-topic. So, Lamzula, try a different poem and see what happens, what other people say.