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Zorua
September 12th, 2009, 05:13 PM
Wrote this yesterday. I'm so shy to show off my work, but here goes. XD

Winged Children



We have become so close to ourselves
We've become the very image of what God wants us to be.
We've become the very image of perfection in the world's perception
We've become inseperable you and me.

We are the winged children of the sky
The winged children of the earth
Molded/Created to perfection from the master of clay/heart.
Giving us the very things we deserve

I pray for the best strength
I pray for the longing love
I pray for all your protection
I'm giving you all; and so is he from above; everything you admire

Let us spread our wings and head off into the future
The master will take us there
Let us shield our eyes, for the future's only danger
Is blinding us with it's so bright light.

We are not the only winged children on Earth's surface
For soon the next generation
From which will be ours and the master's creation
They too, will have wings, just like we do.

abnegation
September 13th, 2009, 03:56 AM
If I do say so myself, this is a very good poem. I enjoyed it quite a bit. It has a different style of writing to most poem and doesn't follow a strict pattern or structure. It flows quite well abd has few mistakes. Hopefully, if I get the time, I will try do a quick review of the poem. I quite like this one, you certainly have a talent so I'm looking forward to seeing more of your work.

Zorua
September 13th, 2009, 05:01 AM
Thanks. XD The unorthodox structure that my poetry has is just what makes them unique.

Lana.
September 13th, 2009, 08:34 AM
You didn't tell me you posted anything!

I really love it, luv. ^^ The message is beautiful - maybe I"m just a sucker for the whole wings thing, but whatever. I really enjoyed it; 'twas beautiful. And you've got no reason to be shy - your work is fantastic.