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Kimi-Kaizer
November 8th, 2004, 03:05 PM
i wrote a peom in school today and here it is:

You Dont Understand

You worry about whats on the outside,
by ignoring what's on the inside,
rejecting the inside feelings and the heart and soul.
I'm sure that you must care deep inside but your just afraid to let it out
why hide it from me? why judge me by my looks? when its whats inside that counts.
Dont judge a book by its cover maybe books dont have feelings but people like me do and you dont understand the everyday life i hafta go through.
Why bother talking to me? why not just ignore me? I'm so uncool, like its hard to pretend im not there.
I have feelings too, and if you wanna see them hurt your not gonna get far. You can talk to the hand and just go away and stay out of my life. You'll only make matters worse.


Im not sure if it falls under being a peom the because its basically my thoughts too

Kyosuke
November 8th, 2004, 04:32 PM
I would say that its a poem, because its your on personal feelings, what most or all poems are about.

I really did like it, it sort of described my life, and how I feel at school so I can relate.

And I think you meant "poem" for the thread title, I'll just edit it ^^.

Kimi-Kaizer
November 8th, 2004, 08:15 PM
oh yeah XD and thanks :P i have another one that i might post too its a best friend peom that i wrote for greg :P

Geometric-sama
November 9th, 2004, 05:50 PM
It's good, but it's pOEm not pEOm XD, and it needs line breaks in those really long lines where it rhymes.

Kimi-Kaizer
November 9th, 2004, 05:52 PM
im not a very good pOEm writer JA sheesh XD

Geometric-sama
November 9th, 2004, 06:37 PM
There's nothing wrong with the pOEm itself, just the line breaks :P