PDA

View Full Version : The Third Road


[Technya]
February 1st, 2005, 09:42 AM
Note:
This poem has a bit of a fair amount of darkness so those who don't like sad/depressive ect. type of poems should not read this


Here I stand
Before two roads dark as my sight
Seemingly waiting for what may not come
In one road lay what I tried and done
In the other await all the horrors to come undone

Tired of fails and wails
Fed up with these nails that keep me crucified
Never had the strength
And never I will
Always thought better to fade away
Remain another shadow in the night

Many times has it crossed my mind
To close this chapter
And put this book away in a charter
To end the torture is all I long for
Time after time Ive let this strike me
Its about time I settled the score
And for once do the striking

Blasphemy is the nature of what I seek
But its something I badly need
Perhaps one day youll awake to the suns rays washing your face during springs birth
While I pay for my sins in the wasteland of those who chose the easy way out

What became of those two roads?
Lets just say I pray to Isis you
Never consider the one I took

MegaDitto
February 1st, 2005, 09:46 AM
That was Dark.I liked it a lot because I like depressive things.Good Work.

~Dragonair~
February 1st, 2005, 10:17 AM
I agree with MegaDitto and nice work though.

[Technya]
February 1st, 2005, 10:21 AM
Thanks guys, didn't think I'd get this kind of good feedback. I have stored away more. I'll see if I put them up later.

Kyosuke
February 1st, 2005, 01:49 PM
That was very sad, yet written very well at the same time. It seems to deal heavily wheather to continue on with life, or to just end it all together and end up going to hell for commiting suicide, because of the sadness thats being felt from within.

I absolutely loved reading it, you used such great vocabulary in describing the emotions being felt. And the complex element adds an even greater amount of satisfaction to reading it and finidng out its true meaning.

Nicely done ^^'.

<[HaZaRdOuS_EnIgMa]>
February 1st, 2005, 05:18 PM
it's very good, there's nothing wrong with dark poetry, if it didn't exist, then there would be little contrast, so i appreciate poems like this. yours was very well written, nice job.

-matt

Kelsey
February 2nd, 2005, 06:19 PM
Note:
This poem has a bit of a fair amount of darkness so those who don't like sad/depressive ect. type of poems should not read this


Here I stand
Before two roads dark as my sight
Seemingly waiting for what may not come
In one road lay what I tried and done
In the other await all the horrors to come undone

Tired of fails and wails
Fed up with these nails that keep me crucified
Never had the strength
And never I will
Always thought better to fade away
Remain another shadow in the night

Many times has it crossed my mind
To close this chapter
And put this book away in a charter
To end the torture is all I long for
Time after time Ive let this strike me
Its about time I settled the score
And for once do the striking

Blasphemy is the nature of what I seek
But its something I badly need
Perhaps one day youll awake to the suns rays washing your face during springs birth
While I pay for my sins in the wasteland of those who chose the easy way out

What became of those two roads?
Lets just say I pray to Isis you
Never consider the one I took

This poem was really deep. And don't be afraid of using darkness in your poems' themes, for as Matt had said, it truly does give the realm of poetry more contrast and depth.

This poem suggests that a choice had been made. You had the choice between two figures that symbolized both right and wrong. You were confused and seemingly naive. You end up choosing the wrong choice.

This choice led you down a path that not many willingly enter. You are thrown from your sweet soul and cast into the fiery depths of a realm where a soul cannot be defined as one's living essence.

Though you realize what you've done, you cannot turn back. For the road is blocked and seemingly under construction for all eternity. You ponder over your decision. After you realize that although hope may be lost for you, you can defend others from this fate.

Awsome poem, Shadow of Ash. ^_____^ I really enjoyed reviewing this one. ^o^

~Kelsey