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愛Forgotten Angel愛
June 8th, 2005, 03:11 AM
The Demon and the Human:
How True Love Tames Even the Blood in Our Veins

Selena sat outside the shire door. The soft breeze blew her long, black hair back and forth. It made a sound, but the sound was undiscribable; the only way you could know what it was like was if you had heard it before. She gently scratched her ears, half lost in thought. She rubbed her fingers along the backs of the ears, finally reaching the pointed top. She withdrew her hands and kracked her knuckles. Her eyes narrowed, then they softed again.

'Why? Why is that man's face not going away? Not only is it not going away, it is embedding itself more into my memory. What is the meaning of this?' she thought. She leaned back, staring at the trees ahead. She smelled meat cooking inside, but it wasn't done, so she didn't go to get it. She ran her fingers through her hair. 'Maybe I'll see him again...' She got up and meandered over to the alge-covered pond. 'Odd. I can remember his face, but not his name. How odd. Maybe I didn't get his name.' She violently shook her head. 'What am I thinking? He's human! Of all things...' The broken image of her face in the water looked worried. She stomped over to a tree.

"He's a human, nothing more," she mumbled to herself. "Hmm? Oh, the food's done." She quickly entered the shire and grabbed a piece of meat. She sat down next to some priest and priestesses. They were gossiping about what they had heard from so-an-so, who heard that from so-and-so, who had heard that from who-knows-who, and soon there wasn't really any gossip, just a lot of useless names.

"...but the demon Yueq got killed by a person called Scott, I believe. Well, that's what Uip said, anyway..." Selena caught a bit of the conversation that was important. She twitched. She had just fought Yueq yesterday, and that was when the human appeared. He had blown back Yueq easily, but only stared at Selena before going back into the distance.

'So, his name is Scott?' Selena thought. She finished the duck limb and threw it in the trash as she began to exit. One of the priests stopped her.

"Where are you going?" he asked kindly. She broke his grasp and put on an annoyed face.

"Just going to look for something..." she barked as she left. She began to run into the think, green forest. Her heart raced, but not from the speed she was going. It was from fear, and excitement. She might actually meet this handsome man.

'Handsome?' she stopped abrubtly as she thought this. 'When did I think he was handsome? Something is wrong with me! I am going to find him...so I can kill him!'

"Oh ho! Really? Is that the only reason you are searching for me?" came a far off voice.

"Huh?" Selena mumbled as she looked in the direction of the voice. "How did you know what I was thinking?" She turned around in a circle, trying to find the man.

"I'm a mind reader, what else. Now then...did you really search for me...so you could kill me?" He jumped down. He was well-built. He looked half-Mexican and half-white. His hair was the perfect color black, and just the right lenght too. Selena drew her head back.

"Yeah. I want to kill you, so that's why I was searching for you." She cracked her knuckles and charged. But something wasn't right. Her movement...it was too slow. Her steps we that of a human, no longer a dog-demon. She saw the priest jump forward to grab her, and she tried to move back, but he was too quick. He pulled her closer.

"Letting me...get in close range...is stupid," she breathed as she readied her claws, but before she could do anything Scott threw her to the ground. Suddenly, something wizzed by, slicing Scott's arm, where Selena used to be. She stared back. She blinked a couple of times before returning to reality.

"What...what was that thing?" she asked hesitantly. Her usually well-kept hair looked scruffy. The wind blew harder, making her hair cover her face. She stared at the blood flowing from Scott's wound. She felt something change, both on the inside and the outside of her.

"Just...a demon...nothing more..." he replied, breathless. Selena stood up, in rage.

"HEY! If you haven't noticed, I am a DEMON too!" she yelled. But something didn't feel right. She didn't feel like a demon.

"Oh really?" Scott snickered. "You're...a demon?" He sat down on a large, grey rock.

"Umm..." Selena tried to hear far off birds singing; she tried to smell the food in the shrine; she tried to run like a dog, but she couldn't. She looked at her now clawless hands. She reached up and touched her ears. They weren't pointy anymore. They were normal human ears. She slowly grasped what had happened.

"I suppose...I'm not anymore..."

Tch...I know it might suck...but that might be because I wrote it at 4: 13 a.m...

Abskull
June 8th, 2005, 06:37 AM
Well, next time try to write it a little later.
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Spelling

shire

Are you in Hobbiton, or a shrine XD?

undiscribable

That would be indescribable. There no such word as undiscribable.

kracked

More like cracked.

enbedded

Imbedded.

You might want to spell check this.

Grammar

I couldn't find anything, but I could always be wrong. If you have it, grammar check your work.

Plot

Sounds intresting. It sounds a little familiar though *cough*InuYasha *cough*.
I'm definitely looking foward to the next chapter.

Overall

It could use some work, but it's pretty good! 8/10 for the first chapter.

Kratos
June 20th, 2005, 03:03 PM
The story is really good. Better than my God of War story.
You don't really want to kill me do you Selena? :(

ashley03
June 20th, 2005, 03:14 PM
very interesting..i'm looking forward to the nexted chapter..and to see what happens to the characters