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Sapphire Milotic
July 22nd, 2005, 09:37 PM
Basically this fic is on pokemon. Gym Leaders versus each other. Well that is. This is volume 1 so there will be more this summer. I'm going to try to complete the whole sereies by the end of Summer.

Chapter 1~ Unbreakable Defence, Lightning Miracles.

"Welcome everyone to Silver Town, which is the Town at the end of the Silver Cave. We are having the Gym Leader Tournament for Kanto and Jotho. We have randomly chosen Brock of kanto and Jasmine of jotho to represent their teams in the first round. Each Gym Leader can only use Six Pokemon. Battle Begin!"said Mary, the DJ and Host for the event.

"Go Rhydon."said Brock, tossing a pokeball to the ground. The pokeball opened and a Rhydon came out, with a All Mighty, powerful Horn.

"Go Akari, my Ampharos."said Jasmine, tossing a pokeball to the ground which revealed her Ampharos which came out of the pokeball immediately.

"Rhydon, use Rock Slide to cancle her movements."shouted Brock, Rhydon heard the command and performed the attack instantly.

"Akari use Thunder to cancle out the Rock Slide attack."yelled Jasmine. Ampharos heard Jasmine yell out a command and used a Thunder attack. The attack instantly hit the boulders that were part of the Rock Slide attack. The rocks were burned into crisps.

"Akari try an Iron Tail."said Jasmine, giving a command that she hope will suceed.

"Ampharos."yelled Ampharos, launching a Iron Tail at Rhydon.

"Rhydon."screamed Rhydon in pain. Rhydon nearly fell to the ground but was determined to continue the battle.

"Rhydon use Horn Drill."said Brock, choosing the One Hit KO move in desperation. Rhydon started spinnig the horn on it's head. Jasmine was not frightened at all even in such situation.

"Thunderbolt the horn Akari."shouted Jasmine, perfectly knowing that electric attacks that hit the horn can damage Rhydon badly.

"Amphaaa!"screamed Ampharos, launching a Thunderbolt at Rhydon's horn.

"Rhyyy don."screamed Rhydon in pain as the attack struck it's horn. Rhydon was shocked and fell to the ground in an instant.

"Rhydon return."said Brock, calling back his Rhydon back to the pokeball.

"Good Battle Brock. choose your next pokemon."said Jasmine.

"All right then, Hmmm who should I choose? I've got it. Go Ludicolo."said Brock, thinking for a moment for his next pokemon and had decided on Ludicolo. He threw the pokeball to the ground and his trusty Ludicolo came out.

"Ludicolo."said Ludicolo, happily dancing.

"Ludicolo use Razor Leaf."said Brock. Ludicolo immediately obeyed Brock's command and launched an array of leaves at Ampharos.

"Ammmm."cried Ampharos, it was in deep pain.

"Akari NO! Try a Thunderbolt."said Jasmine, upset. Akari listened to Jasmine's words and launched a Thunderbolt at Ludicolo.

"All right Ludicolo! Use Solar Beam."said Brock. Ludicolo took in sunlight and launched a Solar Beam attack which collided with Ampharos's Thunderbolt. An Explosion occured. There was a flutter a dust and smoke. And as the smoke cleared, a victorious Ludicolo emerged and Ampharos was down, beaten.

"Akari return,"said Jasmine, bitterly upset, she recalled her Ampharos, she continued by tossing a pokeball to the ground and said "I won't lose. Go Aggron." A blinding light appeared as the ball opened. An Aggron came out, full of energy to fight Ludicolo.

"Ludicolo again, Solar Beam."said Brock, giving a command to Ludicolo.

"Try this. Use Hyper Beam."said Jasmine, determined to win. Aggron got ready to launch a beam while Ludicolo took in sunlight. Moments later, the two beams were launched, at the same time. The pokemon were at it. The beams were launched by the two pokemon and eventually, both gave in and collapsed to the ground.

"NO!"said the two Gym Leaders, in unsion, shocked that their pokemon had fainted.

"All right then Return Ludicolo."said Brock, recalling Ludicolo back to a pokeball.

"Return Aggron."said Jasmine, recalling back Aggron back to a pokeball.

"Go Mudkip."said Brock, tossing a pokeball. The ball opened and a flash of light appeared. Mudkip came out and started to glow.

"An Evolution?!"said Jasmine, in disbelief.

"Mudkip, Yeah!"said Brock, looking really happy about the event. Mudkip changed in size and become a tall Marshtomp. Marshtomp stopped glowing and was ready to battle.

"Go Magneton."said Jasmine, tossing a pokeball to the ground which a Magneton came out of. It was ready to battle.

"Marshtomp, Mud Shot."said Brock, asking Marshtomp to launch a Ground Type attack. Marshtomp launched the attack. It struck Magneton hard, dealing major damage.

"Magneton, Zap Cannon."said Jasmine, bitterly upset. Magneton launched a Electric ball at Marshtomp but Marshtomp had received no damage from the attack.

"Use Earthquake to finish this off!"yelled Brock. Marshtomp released a powerful earthquake which fainted Magneton in an instant.

"Looks like your Magneton could use more training."said Brock.

"Dob't thinkl that you've won. Magneton return. Go Pokeball."said Jasmine, recalling back Magneton and throwing a pokeball.

What could that pokeball be?

Find out in the next chapter.

Please review and reply. I would appreciate it. thanks for everything that you post. i have Chapter 2 with me but I'll post when there are some replys.

Frostweaver
July 22nd, 2005, 11:47 PM
Without reading any part of the fanfic, I'm very sure that hardly anyone will read this.

"Why?"

Well, why read a fanfic that has a spelling mistake in the title... It's a huge hint regarding the author's writing skill. Be sure to check the guides around the forum to try to improve your writing technqiues first, or ask for help in the fanfic lounge, and then take another shot at this fanfic by editing it, or even rewriting it.

Please do ask for help or methods on how to improve your writing. This will even have a certain and definite beneifical effect on your english mark at school as well.

Sapphire Milotic
July 22nd, 2005, 11:56 PM
Where is the spelling mistake? I is 1 in Roman Numbering. kanto is the Kanto Region and Jotho is the Jotho Region. I feel like deleting this. I'll make a whole new fan fic.

Frostweaver
July 23rd, 2005, 01:21 AM
It's Jhoto (japanese romanization) or Johto (english). That's the spelling mistake.

Sapphire Milotic
July 23rd, 2005, 04:14 AM
Sorry about that but I can't change it. A lot of people call it Jotho to. Johto, I thought was not. Nevermind about that. I'll post chapter 2 when I have a few more posts.

Daniel-Son
July 23rd, 2005, 05:45 PM
"Go Rhydon."said Brock, tossing a pokeball to the ground. The pokeball opened and a Rhydon came out, with a All Mighty, powerful Horn. - No no no.. not enough description. Try The Pokeball opened in a flash, and in it's place stood a mighty Rhydon.

"Go Akari, my Ampharos."said Jasmine, tossing a pokeball to the ground which revealed her Ampharos which came out of the pokeball immediately.- Mostly you wouldn't want to overuse words, also not enough description. tossing a pokeball to the ground which revealed her bright yellow Ampahros. You wouldn't really want to say 'which came out of the pokeball immediately' because you already said that when she revealed her Ampharos

I don't recall Jasmine naming her Ampharos "Akari" in the series did she?

"Try this. Use Hyper Beam."said Jasmine, determined to win. Aggron got ready to launch a beam while Ludicolo took in sunlight. Moments later, the two beams were launched, at the same time. The pokemon were at it. The beams were launched by the two pokemon and eventually, both gave in and collapsed to the ground. - Aggron? you said it was an Ampharos just then..

"NO!"said the two Gym Leaders, in unison, shocked that their pokemon had fainted.

"Alrite then Return Ludicolo."said Brock, recalling Ludicolo back to a pokeball.

"Return Aggron."said Jasmine, recalling back Aggron back to a pokeball. - this and the above message has basically been repeated.

"Alrite, Ludicolo return!" said Brock, pointing his pokeball at Ludicolo which released a bright red light. At an instance the Ludicolo vanished.

"Ampharos! Return" as the pokemon was being recalled back into it's pokeball awaiting it's next battle..

Sapphire Milotic
July 23rd, 2005, 06:53 PM
Please read the whole fic again. You basically have not read it properly. As I stated that I nickname was just an imagination of my own. I stated, "Akari, Return". She then called out Aggron. Please Read again.