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Burninating_Torchic
February 9th, 2006, 04:10 PM
This is a fanfic I did a while ago, on PokeGym. It lasted for around 30 chapters before my real life bogged me down with too much work to finish it. I figured I mineaswell post what I already wrote here, to see what you guys think of it. Who knows, maybe I'll even start writing it again.
---
Chapter 1:
Reincarnation of Giovanni

"You idiot, how many times have I told you, Fearow eat Weedle and Caterpie!" The rocket admin said, taking a notebook and smacking a grunt across the face with it.
"But, I thought that was cruel...so I fed it actual worms..." The grunt said, stumbling to the floor.
"Cruel?! You thought feeding Pokemon to a Pokemon was cruel?! I think you need to learn a little bit about the circle of life, and I know just how we can go about teaching that to you!" The admin replied back, pressing a button on a desk in the room they were in, an old fashioned school computer computer lab of sorts. A slot opened in the desk, bringing up an aquarium-type cage containing at least 20 Caterpie and Weedle, squirming around for freedom. Then, he threw a Pokeball from his belt onto the ground, releasing a Fearow.
"You're not...!" The grunt exclaimed, crawling back in fear.
"Now learn your lesson, fool!" The admin replied, as the Fearow descended upon the aquarium.
"No! I won't let you! Hypno!" The grunt exclaimed, throwing a Pokeball at the Fearow. The Pokeball opened to release a Hypno, which, powered by the momentum of the ball, kicked the Fearow upside the chin dealing quite a bit of damage.
"Hypno, Psychic!" The grunt exclaimed. The Hypno landed on the ground, closed it's eyes, and waved it's arms around, striking Fearow with a blast of psychic energy.
"Impudent little brat!" The admin exclaimed. "Return, Fearow! Go, Gengar!" Yet another Pokeball was thrown, and it released a Gengar, which agiley landed on the ground.
"Gengar, Shadow Ball!" The Admin exclaimed. Gengar put it's hands together and formed a ball of pitchblack energy, which it shot at the Hypno, knocking it out in one hit.
"Hypno!" The grunt exclaimed. "Grr...I choose you, Fla-" Suddenly, the grunt was interrupted by the loud slamming of a door against the wall.
"Charles, get back to the meeting room! All admins are required at once!" The person who had busted in, a female admin, yelled at the admin that had been fighting the grunt.
"We'll settle this later." Charles said, returning his Gengar and leaving the room.
The grunt sighed. "Well, he's gone now, little guys..." He said, tipping the aquarium so the Caterpie and Weedle could crawl out. Within a minute they had all dissapeared into some hole in the wall. He returned his Hypno and left the room through a door on the opposite side of the door which Charles had left through.

"I have called you all here today..." A man in a lab coat who's face was masked by a large hood said to a room full of every Team Rocket Admin in Johto. "...To inform you of Giovanni's latest plan."
Mutters of "Giovanni?!" and "I thought he dissapeared!" could be heard throughout the room.
"Yes, we all know that after being defeated once again in Johto 7 years ago, he supposedly vanished and was never seen again. But recently after he vanished, the region of Hoenn was discovered along with new Pokemon. Now, had he been accounted for at the time, who would be controlling Hoenn?"
"US!" An rowdy admin wearing motor gang clothes yelled from the crowd.
"Indeed. Well, since he was missing, it was taken over by two previously unknown teams, Team Aqua and Team Magma. Then, the region of Orre was discovered, and taken over by Team Snagem an organization known as Cipher! Giovanni became infuriated by this and unbeknownst to many, made his return a few months ago. He has come up with a new plan to take over everything, Kanto, Johto, Hoenn, Orre, and beyond!" The man exclaimed, thrusting his arm into the air and pushing a button on the wall behind him. A platform descended from above, and smoke filled the room.
Once the smoke had cleared, a male figure could be seen on the platform. All Rocket Admins in the room recognized the body as Giovanni, but the face...was half robotic. Giovanni was now a Cyborg.
"Giovanni?!" Charles exclaimed. Charles and the female admin who took him from the computer room were not just ordinary admins, they were part of Giovanni's special 5 person elite admin team.
"Yes, it is I." Giovanni replied in a slightly mechanical tone.
The crowd gasped.
"I assume you have other duties?" Giovanni said, turning to the person in the lab coat.
"Indeed." He replied, taking off his hood as he headed towards the door.
"Then you may leave...Blaine."
---
Don't worry, it gets better ^^;

Lily
February 9th, 2006, 05:00 PM
I actually like your basis of comedy (if you purposely intended one). I'm interested in the way you take Pokemon in the sense of realism - the poor Caterpies...not so much with Weedles..I hate the Weedle chain. XP

You began it okay. I think you should try to insert paragraphs, though, as it is the standard way of dialogues/separate topics and such. Also, there were numerous grammatical/spelling errors..they can be fixed if you have MS word or anything that automatically checks it for you.

"Now learn your lesson, fool!" the admin replied, as the Fearow descended upon the aquarium.

The 'T' should be lower cased, if you want it to be connected with the actual dialogue. If it's capitalized, then it begins in a whole new different subject not pertaining to the prior dialogue.

The plotline so far is okay, albeit mediocre if seen another way. You ended it pretty well with the least expected person to appear. Try to fix some of the bland writing style; for example, I would've preferred it if you had made the battle in the beginning more captivating.

Not bad. ^_^;

.:Melissa:.
February 9th, 2006, 07:19 PM
Cool so far!! ^_^ :) i cant wait till the next chapter

Burninating_Torchic
February 10th, 2006, 12:26 PM
Wow, this was a relatively long chapter compared to chapter 1...
---
Chapter 2:
No Threat
---
"Tch, I think that robotic brain screwed up his thought process." Charles said to Jill, the female member of Giovanni's elite squad that had stopped him before, as they walked down a hallway.
"I agree, this plan seems too outlandish and complicated..." She replied, stretching her arms back and yawning.
"But I guess phase 1 isn't too hard, we have Blaine on our side already." Charles said.
"Haven't you heard? Blaine already took Brock and Erika prisoner. It's only a matter of time before they come to our side. In fact, do you want to go watch?" Jill asked in a slightly sinister tone.
"Sure, I'd love to." Charles replied with a more sinister tone and a laugh.

"Ah, Charles, Jill, glad you could make it." Hank, the third member of the elite squad and the rowdy one who had yelled out in the crowd yesterday, said.
"Yeah, yeah, whatever. Where are the prisoners?" Charles asked in response.
"They're right here." Blaine said, walking through the doorway with Brock and Erika behind him.
"They're already converted?!" Jill exclaimed, because when Brock and Erika walked out, they were wearing Team Rocket clothes.
"Indeed." Blaine replied, "Sorry you didn't get to see the show."
"Whatever, we'll be sure not to miss it next time. Who are we converting next?" Charles asked.
"About that..." Hank said in a 'here we go again' tone.
"About it...?" Jill asked.
"We're...the three of us...are responsible for capturing Misty and Koga." Hank replied, sighing.
"That it? That's not so bad, I assume Lauren and Ryan are going to be catching Lt. Surge and Sabrina?" Jill asked.
"Indeed, the other two members of your team are going for the other two Gym Leaders. Now then, I wish you good luck, as I must be going to assist Lauren and Ryan now." Blaine said, exiting through the door he came in through.
"Aw, they need the help of a Gym Leader to catch a Gym Leader? Hah!" Hank laughed.
"As do you three. I will be assiting you in the capture of Misty and Koga." Erika interrupted.
"...Oh..." Hank said, feeling shot down.
"Well, let's get going." Charles said.

"JOIN TEAM ROCKET?!" Misty exclaimed, backing away from Hank. "No way, not in a million years!"
"Then we will have to use force." Jill said. "Go, Crobat!" Crobat popped out of it's Pokeball and swooped towards Misty.
"Starmie!" Misty exclaimed, sending her Starmie out to defend against the attack.
"Crobat, Bite it!" Jill exclaimed. Crobat flew at Starmie and bit it right in it's core, which began flashing rapidly.
"Haha! Gengar, finish it!" Charles exclaimed, releasing his Gengar which immediately began conjuring up a Shadow Ball.
"Starmie!" Misty exclaimed as the Ball hit Starmie dead on and broke through it's flashing core. "What the?!" Misty exclaimed. The ball tore through Starmie and kept going, heading straight for Misty.
"And with the right mixture of herbal components..." Erika said, popping up from behind Misty, commanding her Vileplume to use Sleep Powder right as the Shadow Ball hit Misty. "Whala, she'll be in a coma until I command Vileplume to give her the remedy so we can convert her."
"And now on to Koga." Hank said.

"Erika! I cannot believe you!" Koga said, swiftly running backwards away from Erika, who threw out her Tangela to battle.
"You will join us or die." Erika said in a characterless tone. "Even if you choose the die option, you will still join us." She commanded Tangela to go after Koga.
"You may have seduced Misty, Brock, and Erika, but you shall not take me!" Koga exclaimed, counterattacking with Venomoth, which began flapping it's wings rapidly, blowing Tangela away.
"Then you shall burn in the flames of Team Rocket's wrath." Erika said, as an Arcanine jumped up from behind her.
"Wha-What?! You have accomplaces?!" Koga exclaimed, stuttering.
"You betcha!" Hank said, jumping up onto his Arcanine and Riding it towards Koga, unleashing a flamethrower on Venomoth.
"You'll never catch me!" Koga exclaimed, dissapearing into thin air.
"Can't we now?" Jill said from the corner, sending out a Magneton. "Magneton, Lock On and Zap Cannon!"
Magneton began twitching furiously, aiming at all different points in the room, the singled in on a lamp hanging from the ceiling and fired a blast of lightning at it. The lamp came crashing down, Koga in it.
"Darnit..." He said, dashing away to a door on the other side of the room.
"After him!" Jill exclaimed and the group chased him. The door led to a completely white room.
"I'll go in first." Hank said.
"Wait." Charles replied. "Gengar!" Gengar came out and used it's powers, sending telekinetic waves into the room, revealing all sorts of traps.
"Let's see...a trap hole right in front of the door, spiked sections of the walls ready to crash in on you after that, a spiked floor after that, then a swinging axe, followed by an Android with two lasers mounted on it with 360 degrees view. Peice of cake." Jill said, sending out a Golem. "Golem, you know what to do!" She exclaimed.
Golem jumped across the trap hole, triggering the spiked walls, which were about 3 feet tall sections. It jumped up at just the right time for the spikes to intermesh with eachother, jamming their system, while it landed safely on the top of the spikes. Then, it summoned a giant rock to cover the trap hole. It then proceeded to the Spiked floor, and one spike at a time, used it's massive strength the rip the spikes off the floor and throw them at the walls, creating a path through the floor. It walked up to the swinging axe and got in it's trajectory path. The axe swung at it, and it used it's strength again to hold the axe back, while flinging boulders off it's body to cut the wooden handle of the axe from the ceiling, causing it to crash down and fall against the wall. This triggered the android, which turned around and started firing lasers at Golem, which did nothing to it's rock hard skin. The rest of the group caught up to Golem while it acted as a wall, and Magneton fired a bolt of electricity at the android, causing it to cease to function.
"Pretty basic traps." Jill said as they continued forward.
Koga was in the next room, eating Ramen from a cup. "What?!" He exclaimed, choking on his Ramen.
"Magneton! While he's vulnerable!" Jill exclaimed, commandind Magneton to fire a Zap Cannon at Koga. In his unpreparedness, it hit him dead on, knocking him out so they could carry him back to the base.

At the base, Blaine, Lauren, and Ryan were already waiting for them, brainwashed Brock, Lt. Surge, and Sabrina with them.
"Ah, you are back." Blaine said. "Follow me."
He took them into the back room where a large pod was standing. It was a typical pod like what you see in tv is used for teleportation, fusion, etc. On the center of the Pod front cover was a triangle of turned off lights.
"Place them in here. Koga seems to be regaining conciousness, so we'll do him now." Blaine said, grabbing Koga and putting him in the pod. The door closed, Blaine flipped a switch, and the machine started up. There were all kinds of beeps, and the triangle on the front lighted up rainbow colors. After a few seconds, It stopped, and the pod opened, revealing a Koga with a vacant expression similiar to Erika, Brock, Lt. Surge and Sabrina's.
"Now for Misty." Erika said, commanding Vileplume to wake her up.
"What? What? Where am I?!" Misty exclaimed, immediately being stuffed into the pod, which immediately closed. The same thing as with Koga happened, and a brainwashed Misty stepped out.
Blaine pulled a Walkie-Talkie from his pocket. "You can come in now, sir." He said. Giovanni walked through the door moments later, seeing the line up of the 6 brainwashed gym leaders.
"Very good." He said, "As I thought. Kanto was no threat."
---
Keep the comments coming.

Burninating_Torchic
February 16th, 2006, 01:00 PM
Uh...sorry for the double post? Dunno if that rule applies to fanfics, seeing as that it's a new chapter...
---
Chapter 3
Breakout

"Man, grunt work sucks." Derek, the grunt from the computer lab, said, as he mopped up some Machoke vomit. The Machoke that had spewed it was nearby, laying down on a makeshift bed made of cardboard boxes.
"WHAT?! You don't give the Pokemon Breaks!!!" Lauren, who had just come in, slamming the door to the janitorial type room they were in, exclaimed.
"I'm sorry, it's just, it was sick and..." Derek sputtered.
"I Don't really care if it was having a Heart Attack, Pneumonia, and 3 types of Cancer all at the same time! You do NOT give the Pokemon breaks! Or do you want me to take his break time out of yours, hmm?!" Lauren hissed back at him.
"S-Sorry!" He said weakly, pulling the Machoke off the boxes. "Um...could you get back to work now?" He asked the Machoke wearily.
"Ma...CHOKE?!" Suddenly, The Machoke vomited again, all over Derek's upper half. Lauren laughed hysterically and then exited the room, slamming the door shut behind her.
"Ugh..." Derek sighed, wiping his face off with a towel that was sitting on a nearby stool.
"You really are the lowest level of trash here, aren't you?" A voice came from behind a stack of boxes.
"Who's there?!" Derek exclaimed. swinging around the the boxes.
"Feh, I like you, kid. I think I'll let you out." The voice said. A gleam was seen shining through a space between two boxes, and a cat shaped figure jumped up from behind the boxes, landing on the top of the boxes.
"A talking Skitty?!" Derek replied, backing up.
"We'll talk details later, but for now, follow me!" The Skitty exclaimed, hopping down to the floor and running in the opposite direction of Derek.
"Where are we going?" He asked, puzzled, as he had never seen this part of the room before.
"Right here." The Skitty said, stopping at a stack of multicolored boxes.
"What about it?" Derek asked, "It's just red, blue, green, yellow, purple, and white boxes."
"The boxes correspond with Pokemon types." Skitty said. "Red is Fire, Blue is Water, Green is Grass, Yellow is Electric, Purple is Psychic, and White is Normal. Get my drift?"
"Oh!" Derek said, taking 5 Pokeballs off his belt and throwing them all up at the same time. Hypno, Flaffy, Poliwhirl, Magcargo, and Nuzleaf appeared from them.
"Ok! Now command them to use attacks of their element on their color boxes!" The Skitty shouted to Derek.
"Ok! Hypno, Psychic the purple ones! Flaffy, Thunderbolt the yellow ones! Nuzleaf, Razor Leaf the green ones! Magcargo, Flamethrower the red ones! Poliwhirl, Water Gun the blue ones!" Derek commanded, and the Pokemon obeyed, destroying all but the white boxes.
"As for these..." The Skitty said, swiping his tail and in one swift motion destroying all the white boxes. Triggered by these events, a door broke open on the wall behind. "Let's go!" The Skitty exclaimed and they ran through the door into a passage way leading up to the outside."We made it!" Derek exclaimed once they reached the top, huffing and puffing.
"Not yet!" The Skitty exclaimed. "Look!"
Several Grunts had come out the fornt door and spotted them. "There he is!" One yelled.
"Uh-oh, let's go!" Derek exclaimed, running the other way, Skitty following.
After a while, the other grunts gave up the chase, and Derek and Skitty rested behind a large line of boulders.
"Whew, we got away." Derek panted, gasping for air.
"Yes, for now." Skitty replied. "By the way, my name is Augustus."
"Ok, and why did you rescue me?" Derek asked.
"We've been observing you for quite some time." The boulder at the end of the chain said.
"What the?!" Derek exclaimed. The boulders lifted up and turned around, revealing that it was actually an Onix.
"We saw you and your compassion and kindness for Pokemon, unlike so many other Team Rocket members." The Onix said, kindly.
"Thank you." Derek replied. "To tell you the truth, I never wanted to join Team Rocket...I only joined because my older siblings were in it, and they forced me to..."
"Really?" A voice came from behind a large stone slab on the opposite side of Derek as Onix.
"Who's there? And why can these Pokemon talk?!" Derek questioned frantically.
"Relax." A boy about Derek's age, 13, said, walking out from behind the boulder. He was average height, with green eyes and straight, neat, blond hair and glasses, as opposed to Derek, who was slightly taller, with black eyes and dirty, raggedy brown hair from constantly wearing his Team Rocket hat, which had never come off his head since the day he got it.
"Who are you?" Derek questioned.
"My name is Nick." The boy replied. "And to answer your other question, Augustus was born talking, we think it had to do with the fact that both his mother and father were test subjects for Team Rocket, so he himself is really their experiment, a test of mating two altered Pokemon."
"That's horrible!" Derek exclaimed.
"Yes, it is." Nick replied. "As for my Onix, it is currently wearing a helmet I stole from Team Rocket a few years ago, one that translates what a Pokemon wearing it says as it says it." Derek looked to the Onix's head to see that Nick was right.
"We going back to the base?" Augustus asked Nick.
"Yes, we are, we can explain everything there. Follow me." Nick replied, walking in the other direction, Augustus and Derek following. Once they were a few yards away, thinking Onix was following them, Onix turned around and detransformed and pulled out a walkie talkie.
"I placed a tracking sensor on the escapee grunt. They're leading us right to their base. D-Squad, meet me on Chisai Peak." Ditto said into the walkie talkie, heading a different way then Nick, Derek, and Augustus.

Burninating_Torchic
February 21st, 2006, 12:20 PM
Is anyone still reading this? o.O
---
Chapter 4
The Rebellion Base

"Welcome to our base." Nick said, entering a passcode into the mechanical door, opening it, letting the three of them in.
"This is amazing!" Derek said in dumbfoundedness. Almost every technology known to man was in their base.
"Who's the new kid?" A girl said, walking out of a door in the back of the room. She was the same age as them and had long, curly brown hair and blue eyes. She was wearing a backpack overflowing with sketchbooks.
"Derek, I'd like you to meet Shayna, our top field researcher here. She's perfect when it comes to recording things we see out in the field, and her sketches have flawless detail. A sketch of a window to the basement of the Rocket Base is how we found out about you and your situation." Nick informed Derek.
"Wait, you knew my situation just by a picture of me?!" Derek questioned, thinking that was absurd.
"Are you that technologically inept? Once we got a picture of you we scanned it into the computer and did a search to find out about you." Nick replied.
"Oh, sorry." Derek said, scratching the back of his head. Suddenly, banging was heard on the front door.
"What the?!" Nick exclaimed, turning around.
"This is the Team Rocket Elite D-Squad, open up!" A female voice came from the other side.
"I know that voice! Lauren!" Derek exclaimed, shocked.
"How did they find us?!" Shayna asked, panicking.
"Nick..." Augustus began.
"ONIX?!" Nick exclaimed, peering through the little hole in the door to see a Ditto in the front of the group.
"Your Onix was really a Ditto?! How could you fall for that?!" Derek exclaimed, very mad.
"Hey, you're the one who let them put a tracking sensor on you!" Nick exclaimed, shiftinf the blame right back at Derek.
"Wha?" Derek was clueless. Augustus hopped up on Derek's hood and ripped off a tracking sensor.
"This isn't good..." Shayna said, pulling a Pokeball out of her bag.
"If you won't come out here, we'll come in there!" Lauren yelled. "Rhydon!" The large grey Pokemon appeared from it's Pokeball and began beating down the door instantly.
"The door won't hold long!" Nick exclaimed, taking a Pokeball off his belt.
"Then let's fight them!" Derek exclaimed. "Nuzleaf, I choose you!" The agile little Pokemon appeared from it's Pokeball, adapting a fighting stance.
"Let's go! Dragonair!" Nick exclaimed, releasing the long snake-like dragon from it's Pokeball.
"Smeargle, I choose you!" Shayna exclaimed, sending out the artistic Pokemon.
"I'll help too!" Augustus exclaimed, joining the three other Pokemon to fight. The door broke open, and the Rhydon barged in, followed by Lauren, 2 regular Admins, and 7 grunts.
"Rhydon, Horn Drill!" Lauren commanded, and Rhydon charged forward at Nuzleaf.
"Nuzleaf, avoid it and use Razor Leaf!" Derek exclaimed, and Nuzleaf followed orders, jumping out of the way and throwing razor sharp leaves from nowhere at the Rhydon, hitting it right in the stomach.
"Dragonair, Surf!" Nick exclaimed. The Dragonair summoned a huge wave out of nowhere and controlled it to only hit Rhydon, not damaging any equipment in the room.
"Hyah!" Augustus charged at Rhydon, hitting it with it's tail, causing coins to fall out everywhere from this Pay Day attack.
"Rhydon, Earthquake!" Lauren exclaimed. The giant Rhydon began stomping it's feet rapidly, causing huge ripples in the earth below the base to rip the floor apart, throwing tiles at all the Pokemon which simultaneously got hit by the force of the ground's waves.
"My turn now! Smeargle, ICE BEAM!" Shayna exclaimed. Smeargle grabbed it's tail and pointed it at Rhydon, sending forth a beam of Ice from the tip, freezing Rhydon solid and stopping the earthquake.
"An Ice Beam?!" Derek exclaimed, confused.
"Smeargle's the most adaptable Pokemon there is, it can copy any move it wants and keep it with it's Sketch attack!" Shayna replied, feeling triumphant.
"Hah! You defeated my Rhydon, big deal!" Lauren taunted. "Now you feel the true power of a Team Rocket Elite! All out!" She threw her other 4 Pokeballs in the air, releasing Scizor, Hitmontop, Absol, and Nosepass. "And of course Ditto!" She exclaimed, Ditto crawling up to join her other Pokemon.
"Mehehehe..." Ditto chuckled evily, transforming into Smeargle. "Most adaptable Pokemon, eh? I think not!" It exclaimed, turning Smeargle's own attack against it.
"That's right! Ditto, Sketch!" Lauren exclaimed, and Ditto began painting itself with it's tail. It formed a picture of Triple Kick, taken from Lauren's Hitmontop, and the picture faded into it, showing that it had learned the move.
"Here's a special surprise for you!" Ditto exclaimed, moving it's legs rapidly as Hitmontop did the same. "Triple Kick x2! 6 Kick Attack!" Ditto and Hitmontop charged at Smeargle, each hitting it 3 times, knocking it out.
"Smeargle!" Shayna exclaimed. Meanwhile, Lauren's other Pokemon beat up Nuzleaf, Dragonair, and Augustus.
"We can't beat them alone!" Derek said in dismay, reutrning his Nuzleaf as Nick returned his Dragonair.
"This is really pathetic, Nick." A voice came as the doors Shayna had come through opened. Another boy their age came out, with a brown mullet that reached to about his neck and brown eyes. He was wearing black shorts and T-shirt with flame designs on them.
"M-Michael!" Nick exclaimed, backing away from Lauren.
"You, Shayna, and this ex-Rocket Grunt couldn't defeat a single Rocket admin by yourselves? That's sad." Michael said in a punishing tone.
"Hey! How dare you mock me!" Lauren said, flustered. "I'm a Rocket Elite, leader of the D-Squadron!"
"Oh big deal, unless you're also the queen of England, I'd shut up if I were you." Michael said, bored.
"HOW DARE YOU?!" Lauren exclaimed, furiously. All Pokemon! Attack that brat!" All her Pokemon turned away from who they were fighting and headed towards Michael.
"Torchic!" He exclaimed, releasing a Torchic from it's Pokeball.
"You think you can stop us! Hah!" Lauren exclaimed as the Pokemon kept charging.
"You won't stop? Ok then, we'll do this the hard way." Michael replied, confident. Torchic began glowing in the colors of a blazing fire as the Pokemon kept charging at it. At the last moment, the glow exploded in a blast of firey blaze, sending all 5 of Lauren's Pokemon back, defeated, laying next to her Rhydon. Torchic and Michael, however, were unharmed.
"What the?! Everyone, return!" Lauren exclaimed, returning all her Pokemon to their Pokeballs. "We'll be back!" She shouted, running out the door, her squadron following her.

Lily
February 21st, 2006, 12:46 PM
Just a note: Did you even read my review? o_O; Apparently making an effort to improve isn't plausible in your mind.

Burninating_Torchic
February 25th, 2006, 06:37 PM
Just a note: Did you even read my review? o_O; Apparently making an effort to improve isn't plausible in your mind.

Well, keep in mind that these chapters have all already been made up through about chapter 30. For now, I'm just going to post them as they were originally, but if enough people make the same variety of comments, I make go back over them and change stuff.
---
Chapter 5
The Emmergance of the Leader of the E-Squadron

"Pick up the pace, Ryan!" Lauren yelled to him as he fell behind the group of the 5 elite admins.
"Sorry, I'm running as fast as I can." He said, shamefully.
"All of you pick up the pace!" Jill shouted back. "We need to make it back to the base by nightfall!"
"Lauren, I'm tired..." Ditto yawned, sitting on Lauren's shoulder.
"Why don't you turn into a Dragonite and fly us to the base or something?!" Lauren retorted.
"You know I can't do that, I'd need to see a real dra-" Suddenly, a Dragonite swooped over head, completely randomly.
"That'll work!" Charles exclaimed, relieved, as Ditto transformed into a Dragonite and the group got on it's back. They followed the other Dragonite for a while, as it seemed to be going the same way as them.
After a while, the other Dragonite suddenly turned around, facing Ditto.
"DRAAAAA!" It roared, it's antennae glowing.
"Ditto, get us out of here before we're mincemeat!" Charles exclaimed. The Dragonite fired a Hyper Beam at Ditto, who dodged just in time.
"You want to play rough, eh?!" Ditto shouted to it in response. "Take this!" It fired a Hyper Beam of it's own, knocking the Dragonite back.
"Insolent fools." The Dragonite said in a deep, serious tone, rearing up and floating in a standing position.
"What the?!" Jill questioned. The Dragonite transformed in the same matter Ditto does, revealing a Mewtwo.
"Muh-Muh-Muh-MEWTWO?!" Ryan exclaimed, dumbfounded.
"The one that got away...tch.." Lauren said, annoyed.
"It's been years since you dissapeared from the lab," Charlie said with a grin, "There's new Pokemon now, Pokemon powerful enough to stop you!" He threw his Pokeball into the air, releasing a Rayquaza.
"Charlie, you didn't..." Jill said, concerned.
"Yes, I stole it from the Boss' room, because I knew this was going to happen! Gengar told me with it's future sight!" Charlie exclaimed in rebuttle, hopping off Ditto onto Rayquaza.
"Bring it, Snakey." Mewtwo said in a challenging tone.
"Oh, we will." Charlie said, Rayquaza dashing forward towards Mewtwo.
"QUAAAAAZAAAA!" It exclaimed, firing a huge hyper beam at Mewtwo.
"I've deflected bigger before!" Mewtwo replied, waving it's arms and putting up a deflector shield.
"Have you now." Charlie said, commanding Rayquaza to launch 4 more Hyper Beams.
"Impossible!" Mewtwo said as the first one blew up on contact with the shield and was gone. "A Pokemon should have to recharge after a hyper beam, it shouldnt be able to move, let alone fire more!" The 4 Hyper Beams all hit the deflector shield at once, breaking through it and hitting Mewtwo with supreme force.
"I figured that past that shield of yours, you were really a weak little clone after all." Charlie said, riding Rayquaza down, parallel to the falling Mewtwo. He pulled an Elite Rocket Ball out of his pocket, a better version of the Pokeballs Mewtwo used when he made his clone army. It hit Mewtwo dead on and captured it with ease, returning to Charlie's hand. Charlie flew Rayquaza back up, hopped on Ditto, and returned Rayquaza.
"Let's go." Hank said, and Dragonite sped off with the 5 of them.
...or at least that's what they thought. While Charlie was fighting Mewtwo, Ryan had accidently slipped and fell off Ditto's tail, plunging into the forest below them. A Tropius had broke his fall, but this angered the now wounded Tropius greatly.
"Ah, what the hey, I have room for one more Pokemon on my team." Ryan said, throwing a Regular Rocket Ball, a Pokeball with a black top and a Red R on it, at the Tropius, catching it. He continued through the forest aimlessly, not knowing where he was going, when suddenly, a group of Primeape jumped out of a tree, in a rage for no apparent reason.
"Primeape?" Ryan asked. "No problem." He threw a Pokeball up, releasing a Ninetales, which immediately summoned a huge blaze from it's mouth, knocking out the entire group of Primeape. He continued through the forest and eventually reached it's edge, where a large metal dome facility was located.
"Wait a second..." Ryan said, thinking back to the picture of the base that Lauren had showed him. "This is it! This is their base!" He exclaimed, sending out all 6 of his Pokemon, Ninetales, Tropius, Golduck, Sceptile, Cloyster, and Lanturn. "Let's go!" He said to them, rushing towards the door.
"Survalience cams pick up a male figure approaching our base!" Shayna said to Nick, Derek, and Augustus.
"Who is it..." Nick said, bored.
"Let me do a background check." Shayna replied, typing something into the computer. "Got it!" She reported after a few seconds. "His name is Ryan, he's one of the 5 Rocket Elites!" She exclaimed.
"This should be fun." Nick said, releasing his Dragonair.
"And fun it will be." Ryan said as his Ninetales melted a hole in the door and him and his Pokemon crawled through.
"That's not right! A Ninetales should not be able to burn through that door, not in a million years!" Nick exclaimed, slightly frightened.
"You're not just messing with any random Rocket Admin here." Ryan said, confident. "You're messing with a member of the 5 Rocket Elite, Leader of the E-Squad!"
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And yeah, the story does get better as it progresses...