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Yuka
February 18th, 2006, 02:52 PM
Black Roses

Today I received thirteen black roses,
I don't know who they're from,
But I love them.

They're beautiful, but dark,
Soft, but sharp,
Sweet, but harsh.

A note came with the Black Roses.
It read, "Kissed by Death, yet beautiful,
Just like you."

Who would know me so well,
And love me so much?
Could it be the one who's going to save me?

moody_cow_
February 18th, 2006, 08:56 PM
Wow I really like the poem!!! I think you did a great job! I can't wait to read more of your poems!!!

pokejungle
February 18th, 2006, 09:08 PM
I think it got a bit choppy, so watch the rythm and flow of you poem. And using the word "beautiful" twice irked me.

But not a bad poem; rather short though.

Yuka
February 19th, 2006, 10:40 AM
Thanks,for the advise!I'll be sure the next one will be better!^^

Midori Chi
February 19th, 2006, 11:19 AM
*claps*

This is very good! But like I say to all short poems (including my own)
..make it longer! XD Your poems are very nice and if you made it longer, you could add more detail and more emotion to it.

Keep up the good work! ^^