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How come I'm almost 17?
Updated December 9th, 2011 at 4:31 AM by Misheard Whisper
Well, it's just over a month away now, but it's still weird to think about it. I've been 16 for almost a year (funny that) and in that time, it's grown to be my identifier. It's such a comfortable age. An even number, a square number and a number which legally entitles me to all sorts of debauchery and increased fares on public transport.
On top of that, it's the year in which I've spent most time on the internet. I've come to love PC quite a bit during my time here, but I've probably been more active in 2011 than in either 2010 or 2009. I've joined some new forums as well, and gone back to some old ones I abandoned or was forcibly ejected from.
In relation to that, my 17th birthday is the day after my third PC anniversary. That'll make three years, which - if memory serves me rightly - entitles me to my PC Veteran emblem. What?! How does that happen? I don't feel I deserve it, especially when I look at how long some people have been around and how much they've contributed. On the other hand, I can look at some of the little nooblets running around NU/W and other places and appreciate just how firmly ensconced in the community I am - even if the community doesn't really know it.
And I have been flying under the radar for the most part. Aside from the odd foray into OC, I tend to avoid the 'fun crowd' that seems to exist here. I sort of live under a bridge in the fanfiction section. At one point, I'd made over 700 posts there and less than 20 elsewhere. Several times, I've done my best to change that, going on posting sprees around the forum. For the most part, it was fine. I made a few friends and put my two cents into several discussions. In the end, though, I kept returning to Fanfiction. I just remembered that there used to be an Other Writing forum before they were merged. Man, now I feel old because I almost can't recall it.
Somehow I've managed to be plenty active over the last three years (albeit sporadically) without becoming as entrenched in the community as I could be. Some people take to the crowd here like a fish to water, and get absorbed right in. I see people getting modded who join after me, some who've only joined earlier this year. I'm not complaining, really. It's just intensely amusing to watch it happen, in a way. It's kind of like schadenfreude, but . . . not quite. That is a word, by the way, no matter what Firefox spellcheck says.
Perhaps this blog entry would be better suited to posting on my actual birthday/anniversary, but it's all flowing out of my mind now. It doesn't matter when it gets said, as long as it's said.
And it's not like I'm trying to communicate some kind of huge, important message. At least, I don't think I am. I'm just reflecting a little bit on the time I've had here at PC. It's not as long as many of you, less than half of some of you, and less than a third of a few of you. But it's my time, and I . . . don't feel I've seized on that, to be honest.
Like I said, I've been flying under the radar. I could have done so much more, talked to so many people. I still could. But you know what? I'm happy. I'm happy to just hang quietly around and do things my way, not bothering anybody.
I think that's how I've lived most of my life, actually. 'Doing things my way, not bothering people' sums up the first twelve years of my life perfectly. In the last four years - since I started high school - I've leaned more towards 'Doing things my way, bothering people if I have to', but on the whole, I fly pretty low. My friends know me as a bit crazy and kind of out there, but that's a small group. Well . . . If you put all the people who I consider friends or close enough in one place, I would be surprised by how many there are. But I still . . . I don't want to bother them. There's a part of me - a very large part - that just wants to sit quietly in the corner of every class and try desperately not to get in anybody's way. So in a way, I haven't changed at all. I've just gotten better at pretending.
So this blog entry took kind of a sad turn, which is kind of contrary to the original intention. Nostalgia should be a happy feeling, and that's pretty much the intention of this blog. I could turn it around by talking about my nostalgia for Pokemon, but I'd probably just end up ranting about how my sister lost my Blue version and the GBC it was in. Grr. See, there I go.
Anyway, I want to thank the Acade- I mean, PC. Regardless of what I might say about not actively participating much, it has been fun. I look forward to staying here for many years to come.
Again, this should really be my anniversary post, but pfft. Carpe diem, quam minimum credula postero. That's my motto.
Also, I want to make post #3,333 on my 3rd anniversary at 3:33 pm (or am, whatever). Just saying. That works out to only a post every two days, though.
Posted December 9th, 2011 at 11:03 AM by Esper
Posted December 9th, 2011 at 2:32 PM by Misheard Whisper