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This is the Story of Me.

Posted November 10th, 2011 at 05:32 PM by Kaori

Today my family and I went to Miami, as some of you guys know. We had quite an adventure, seeing all the tall buildings again as well as walking the busy streets. It was pretty fun for a while! And then we headed down more south, to West Palm Beach and visited my old neighborhood.

Taking this trip inspired me to make this blog for many reasons. This neighborhood contained the house of my father's friend who passed away and let us stay in it until time called. This house contains many memories that makes a big part of my heart, complete. & This house is how I found this place and you all.

Before I joined PC, and before I lived at that house, I lived up in North Florida. There came a time I had to move, and that too was pretty hard. I've been living in that house since I was about 7. Surprisingly moving down south didn't hurt me as much as I thought it would. In fact the memories created in that new house makes me sad to think about because they were so strong to me. One day I decided to look up "Shiny Rampardos". I'm known for my typos, but I accidentally typed in "shiny rom pardos". That lead me to PC of course!

And I decided to join for whatever reason. My first username? Lil_Miss. Amazing, right? I got my brother to join too, and I let him sign up first. I'm a good sister! u_u I'm sure a lot of you know him as the ex-smod Hiiro, or just as being an amazing friend -- and still too, when he's online. Anyway, I didn't think I'd be actively online for 3 long years when I first joined, whatsoever. I didn't even think I'd be here for a year to be honest. But there was another new member, as some of you know as well, Wolflare! He was a pretty cool nub, which I still find today not even a "nub". He was pretty darn amazing! Oh Wolf, I'm not hinting anything, you're still amazing. So we used to VM each other a lot and it kept me to keep coming at this place because he's a pretty cool guy, and he showed me what you can do around this place (bite me, I was pretty new to forums). I posted around breaking the rules here and there, but we all learn from our mistakes right? I also met some of my best friends that are still here today. Twilight Sky, Spinosaurus, ~Kawaii~, Drew, pretty much a lot of people.
I don't want to keep this PC story long since I know I can get carried away, but that house also contains the memory of becoming ~Morning Bliss~. Now here I'm just laughing really. MB had her haters and her fans but she never cared whether people hated her or not as long as she was enjoying what she wanted to accomplish. Oh the days of attempting to accomplish becoming a moderator of DPPt! Did she get what she wanted? Naw. Did she ever give up? Here and there, but never fully. Did she still end up becoming a moderator? YAH! Even up to this day, I can't believe I used to be that girl, a girl I find may people should look up to because I had so much personality and charisma around here, and in real life. I can't remember a time I didn't brighten up someone's day back then. As for those who back talked me back then? Look who likes me now!

Aside from the whole internetwebbing experience, I actually had a great life. We went out, I had my complete family, and I did the things I loved to the highest point I could. There was a big, and I mean huge, tree that I would always climb to a point to just relax and read, or even just play some games or draw there. I could escape anything and just sit there and look at where I was in life, and just smile. There were even strong tarzan like things I could swing across and it was so fun just jumping off from them into piles of leaves. I had a doberman too, Mia, and she was my pride and joy. She had so many funny ways of doing things, and I loved her. Is she dead? No. Do I still have her? No. Nevertheless it's the memories I had with her that were all in that house, in that yard and everything. Not to mention my grandpa had lived with us for a short while in that house, and I love him so much. Unfortunately he's no longer here today in the world, but I'll always keep him in my heart. r.i.p
There was a small bridge in the front yard followed up by an Orchid tree where I used to hang out and just relax with my family and we used to talk and just have a good time. There was even a mango tree we could get mangoes off of, and enjoy together. All of these things were ours, although not all ours. We lived there for about a year and a half, and things started to slip.

My dad's friend gave him this house before he shortly passed away. His dad allowed us to stay there until however long we needed. However he was sick with cancer and my dad did everything in his power to take him to the hospital and everything. I needed to attend school, but we didn't really trust the public schools around my neighborhood. We only had one computer, and so the dad gave us the money to get us the laptops my brother and I have now. The one I'm using to make this blog! Point is, he gave us this joy that I really can't live without right now. He died from the cancer when he couldn't take it anymore, and that's when his daughter came in the story. The Mercedes her dad granted us? She claimed it. We had a time limit to stay at that house too.

So we moved, and moved again, and here I am grieving over the past after the experience of passing it by today. I cried then. And I'll always cry just thinking about the many memories I had there. Many I could type and type away just to share it all with you, but you'd still never feel the full experience. She sold the house to another, which was expected since she'd then become pretty darn rich. That wonderful bridge? Painted white. So natural, right? That orchid tree? Gone. The famous big tree I loved so much? All gone but a stump and some branches. The garden in the back? Gone! There's now tiles going down on one side of the house, and I can't even. It's not even that private anymore, the way I loved it. But it's not ours, so I can't complain. Still, somehow, it really hurts.

We ate at one of our favorite restaurants to eat at in the neighborhood, and that's where I cried. It was pretty painful for me. You'd think seeing your old house again would make you smile and help you move on, but it just makes me want the past back more. Sure without one part, I couldn't reach another, and without being there, I wouldn't be here, but there was better. I'd taking everything I have now to throw it all away, just to be back there.

On the way back here, I listened to two songs in particular, and only these two songs.

Miranda Lambert - The House That Built Me
Paramore - The Only Exception

I guess I just felt like sharing this to you all! Whether you guys even read this or not, it feels good to let everything if not at least the most, out.
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Comments

  1. Old Comment
    I think that first song was pretty perfect to describe it. :(

    But hey, where would you be without that house to help build you? I mean yeah, things change and people change too, but you still have all of those wonderful memories to remind you why that place was special. Who knows? Maybe the places you're at now - or the places you'll be - will be just as special as that house was to you. I know sometimes nostalgia makes you wish you could just give up everything you had now for what you did, but I always think the best memories and experiences are the ones you only get to have once, too. You might disagree, but I think that if you ate the same kind of ice cream all day every day it'd get kinda old and something you don't ever think about, wouldn't it? Maybe it's just me, but that's the way I think it is.

    So yeah, enjoy all of your memories whenever you can because they really are what build you. But don't let nostalgia make those memories just things you long for - remember them for the happiness and stuff. :3
    Posted November 10th, 2011 at 05:43 PM by Vrai Vrai is offline
  2. Old Comment
    Kaori's Avatar
    I totally forgot to mention something that I'd been thinking on my way back here to add!

    --
    So you know, since the past has built to where I am now, whether I like it or not, I've always tried to try and bring back the past to me. How? Well the motivation Morning Bliss had? I try to get back too. She wore the tag in my signature I'm currently wearing, but of course how does that help? There's a lot more I do but it'll never be the same which is to be expected. I also used to talk to a lot of the people that still go here more back then, and I try to do so now too. It. Just. Won't. Be. The. Same.
    Posted November 10th, 2011 at 05:49 PM by Kaori Kaori is offline
  3. Old Comment
    Exile's Avatar
    This was such an awesome read, it seemed like things were awesome for you back then and a lot of your motivation probably stemmed from the fact that you were happy and enjoying life. It definitely doesn't go downhill from here though, you might reach an all time low, but then your upward climb begins again. You're awesome, Lil_Miss and don't you ever forget that. <3
    Posted November 10th, 2011 at 06:34 PM by Exile Exile is offline
  4. Old Comment
    Patatas Fritas's Avatar
    I liked reading that, it bought a tear to my eye. I can't forget how motivated you were back then as Bliss and it's great you eventually because a mod (even if it wasn't the section you wanted)
    I'm happy you're enjoying life as well! It's horrible all that stuff with the house has happened, but just remember that it's all up there in your memories <3 STAY KAORI 4EVA GURL
    Posted November 11th, 2011 at 08:49 AM by Patatas Fritas Patatas Fritas is offline
  5. Old Comment
    mystletainn's Avatar
    Very touching Kaori! I liked it. :)
    Posted November 11th, 2011 at 09:26 AM by mystletainn mystletainn is offline
  6. Old Comment
    Overlord Drakow's Avatar
    Reading this blog reminded me of this;

    shinell silva: you know you're just like my grandpa you remind me of him so much
    Overlord Drakow: How so.
    shinell silva: because he acted just like you, you just make me think of him all the time, idk
    Overlord Drakow: Should I take that as a compliment.
    shinell silva: you should, you really should
    Overlord Drakow: Why is that.
    shinell silva: because i loved him a lot and i miss him

    Anyway I remember when I moved house a long time ago in Australia and eventually revisited my old house. We just drove past it but the owners cut down a very nice tree in the front yard. It wasn't a climbing tree but it was pretty saddening at the time to see how they had changed the front yard. I can relate to your pain somewhat I suppose. You'll get over it anyway.
    Posted November 11th, 2011 at 10:12 AM by Overlord Drakow Overlord Drakow is offline
  7. Old Comment
    Squirrel's Avatar
    Approval Cat approves the touching story! <3

    I especially like the songs at the end... Hehe :3
    Posted November 29th, 2011 at 05:05 PM by Squirrel Squirrel is offline
 

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