Aizuke
[b]long sword style[/b]
- 3,025
- Posts
- 16
- Years
- Age 34
- Canberra, Australia
- Seen Nov 6, 2015
So today, I've been thinking about something. Well just my life really. And it's come to my realisation how I've been taking everything for granted. And that I've been quite selfish with myself, while not considering how everyone else in my family felt. For that, I'm ashamed of myself really. I've been too busy thinking about what I what, instead of what my family wanted..
So the story begins; last Thursday I had a fight with my parents. I was pretty darn upset about the whole thing, although at that time I was thinking, "They're wrong, I'm right. Why do they do this to me? Why can't I live a normal life like everyone else.." Even if while they were yelling at me/lecturing me I thought to myself half the things they said are true, but I was also thinking this is unfair to how I want to live my life. But now I realised, everything they said to me was true. I was just too caught up in my own selfishness to realise. I know, and even if I don't show it, I can be a pretty stubborn person at time. I won't listen to reason and will always try to prove myself right. Because that is how selfish I am.. But I'm wrong, in this case. But what we had a fight about is that I was telling my dad I needed to go renew my license since they had sent me a letter saying my license would be over soon. He said he would go with me and I would take my sister's children with us, since I babysit them while my sister works.
Most people wouldn't know, I work with my family. We own a cafe franchise. During the weekdays, I babysit my sister's children while she works during the day.
Anywho, I said don't worry about it, since I know the children would be fussy. My sister's 1 year old baby won't go to anyone, except for my sister or myself, and to get a new license I would have to go and talk to people by myself or take a picture, and I wouldn't be able to leave her alone with my dad because she would cry her head off. My dad said I would have to do it, or else I would start blaming my sister or her kids because I couldn't get my license. But I said I wouldn't blame them, I would blame work, I hate work, I hate the shop. I hate how it consumes my life and I'm not able to do things freely. Here is how the selfishness was released. It took a while to sink in, which is pretty stupid of me. How I did not realise how incredibly selfish I have been. I'm an idiot, as harsh as it sounds, but it's true. My parents had a full on massive lecture to me about it all. Like I said, everything they said was true, it took a while to sink it, but now I finally realise.
...Most people have it rough, when it comes to their lives. To be honest, I have never had to deal with any sort of issues, especially regarding money. I'm sure some of you know that some things you aren't able to get, because your parents say no to you, or you just don't have the money for it. As for me, everything I've always wanted, I've always got. Not to sound like I'm some spoiled brat or I'm smug or anything, anything that I've wanted isn't such a big deal or doesn't cost so much money. Some people don't have the opportunity to go with their parents and get what they want as soon as they ask, "Mum/Dad, can I have this please?" It's not something I expect from my parents to be honest, we're not super rich or anything. We're just a normal type of family, but regardless, my parents always give me what I want. I asked for a HD TV, and that very night my parents whisked me away to the shops and actually bought me one.
My life, I have it pretty easy, I don't have to pay for bills, rent, my car petrol money, my car itself, just anything. They even paid for when I went to my Art School and they also paid for my plane ticket to America as my birthday present, and both of those things are pretty expensive, like over $1000 dollars. Not everyone can pull that out of nowhere as quickly, but my parents did for me. I know alot of people who don't have that sort of opportunity and have to pay those sort of things themselves with their own money. But I admit, I took most of those things for granted. I took my parents for granted, what they've done for me and are doing for me for my whole life. I always thought being the last child, I've always been neglected, but no. How wrong I was, completely and utterly wrong. Looking at my brothers and sister, my life has been the fair easiest than all of theirs. A lot of people get the stereo type of asian parents drive their parents to be the best, but that isn't my case. My parents didn't make me do anything, schooling or anything, I got average grades and they didn't care, I stopped going to school and they weren't mad at me or anything, they understood me. They understood that getting a life career takes a long time, and when I've decided what I want to do, they will help me in every step of the way to achieving my life's dreams. My parents do a lot of things for me, my family, they've made a lot of sacrifices for every single one of us.
My parents are amazing people at how they've raised me. And how they've helped with my life. And yet, I was so selfish to think such things like how I hated working. I'm sure most people would want to work for themselves, instead of having to work under someone else, or have a crappy boss or get underpaid or whatever. I don't have a boss, I work equally with my parents, heck if I think about, I am pretty much my own boss. While my sister isn't at work, I'm pretty much in charge of what goes around. I am basically the manager there, and being at the age of 20, I think that's pretty damn good. I've always worked there, I didn't have to find a job because the opportunity was already given to me. As people know, it's hard to find a job, especially if you have no qualifications, and while working with my parents, I've built a lot of qualifications. Most people aren't as luck as I was, to work in such an area because their parents gave it to them on a silver platter. My parents care a lot about me, and wouldn't go through all this trouble if they didn't care. I can't imagine having any other sort of parents, I love my parents and I wouldn't trade them for the world. I mean even if I don't have days off work, that's okay, I don't work much on the weekdays since I'm babysitting, so basically that's having days off sorta, since it's not as hard as working. It's a sacrifice I'm willing to make, because a family works together as a team, and being selfish, just breaks it all apart.
I probably haven't been the best daughter to them, but now that all changes and I will do my best to make my parents happy, and to help them with their life as they have given me. I never complain about my life once, or say it's crappy or anything and now you understand why. I love my family, I love my life, everything is just perfect as it is.
....I was probably going to type more but I've forgotten now, haha. Oh well this is my life so yeah. I doubt anyone would read this, but I don't mind. I just wanted to throw my feelings out there.
So the story begins; last Thursday I had a fight with my parents. I was pretty darn upset about the whole thing, although at that time I was thinking, "They're wrong, I'm right. Why do they do this to me? Why can't I live a normal life like everyone else.." Even if while they were yelling at me/lecturing me I thought to myself half the things they said are true, but I was also thinking this is unfair to how I want to live my life. But now I realised, everything they said to me was true. I was just too caught up in my own selfishness to realise. I know, and even if I don't show it, I can be a pretty stubborn person at time. I won't listen to reason and will always try to prove myself right. Because that is how selfish I am.. But I'm wrong, in this case. But what we had a fight about is that I was telling my dad I needed to go renew my license since they had sent me a letter saying my license would be over soon. He said he would go with me and I would take my sister's children with us, since I babysit them while my sister works.
Most people wouldn't know, I work with my family. We own a cafe franchise. During the weekdays, I babysit my sister's children while she works during the day.
Anywho, I said don't worry about it, since I know the children would be fussy. My sister's 1 year old baby won't go to anyone, except for my sister or myself, and to get a new license I would have to go and talk to people by myself or take a picture, and I wouldn't be able to leave her alone with my dad because she would cry her head off. My dad said I would have to do it, or else I would start blaming my sister or her kids because I couldn't get my license. But I said I wouldn't blame them, I would blame work, I hate work, I hate the shop. I hate how it consumes my life and I'm not able to do things freely. Here is how the selfishness was released. It took a while to sink in, which is pretty stupid of me. How I did not realise how incredibly selfish I have been. I'm an idiot, as harsh as it sounds, but it's true. My parents had a full on massive lecture to me about it all. Like I said, everything they said was true, it took a while to sink it, but now I finally realise.
...Most people have it rough, when it comes to their lives. To be honest, I have never had to deal with any sort of issues, especially regarding money. I'm sure some of you know that some things you aren't able to get, because your parents say no to you, or you just don't have the money for it. As for me, everything I've always wanted, I've always got. Not to sound like I'm some spoiled brat or I'm smug or anything, anything that I've wanted isn't such a big deal or doesn't cost so much money. Some people don't have the opportunity to go with their parents and get what they want as soon as they ask, "Mum/Dad, can I have this please?" It's not something I expect from my parents to be honest, we're not super rich or anything. We're just a normal type of family, but regardless, my parents always give me what I want. I asked for a HD TV, and that very night my parents whisked me away to the shops and actually bought me one.
My life, I have it pretty easy, I don't have to pay for bills, rent, my car petrol money, my car itself, just anything. They even paid for when I went to my Art School and they also paid for my plane ticket to America as my birthday present, and both of those things are pretty expensive, like over $1000 dollars. Not everyone can pull that out of nowhere as quickly, but my parents did for me. I know alot of people who don't have that sort of opportunity and have to pay those sort of things themselves with their own money. But I admit, I took most of those things for granted. I took my parents for granted, what they've done for me and are doing for me for my whole life. I always thought being the last child, I've always been neglected, but no. How wrong I was, completely and utterly wrong. Looking at my brothers and sister, my life has been the fair easiest than all of theirs. A lot of people get the stereo type of asian parents drive their parents to be the best, but that isn't my case. My parents didn't make me do anything, schooling or anything, I got average grades and they didn't care, I stopped going to school and they weren't mad at me or anything, they understood me. They understood that getting a life career takes a long time, and when I've decided what I want to do, they will help me in every step of the way to achieving my life's dreams. My parents do a lot of things for me, my family, they've made a lot of sacrifices for every single one of us.
My parents are amazing people at how they've raised me. And how they've helped with my life. And yet, I was so selfish to think such things like how I hated working. I'm sure most people would want to work for themselves, instead of having to work under someone else, or have a crappy boss or get underpaid or whatever. I don't have a boss, I work equally with my parents, heck if I think about, I am pretty much my own boss. While my sister isn't at work, I'm pretty much in charge of what goes around. I am basically the manager there, and being at the age of 20, I think that's pretty damn good. I've always worked there, I didn't have to find a job because the opportunity was already given to me. As people know, it's hard to find a job, especially if you have no qualifications, and while working with my parents, I've built a lot of qualifications. Most people aren't as luck as I was, to work in such an area because their parents gave it to them on a silver platter. My parents care a lot about me, and wouldn't go through all this trouble if they didn't care. I can't imagine having any other sort of parents, I love my parents and I wouldn't trade them for the world. I mean even if I don't have days off work, that's okay, I don't work much on the weekdays since I'm babysitting, so basically that's having days off sorta, since it's not as hard as working. It's a sacrifice I'm willing to make, because a family works together as a team, and being selfish, just breaks it all apart.
I probably haven't been the best daughter to them, but now that all changes and I will do my best to make my parents happy, and to help them with their life as they have given me. I never complain about my life once, or say it's crappy or anything and now you understand why. I love my family, I love my life, everything is just perfect as it is.
....I was probably going to type more but I've forgotten now, haha. Oh well this is my life so yeah. I doubt anyone would read this, but I don't mind. I just wanted to throw my feelings out there.
