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"Perfection."

Palamon

Palamon

Silence is Purple
8,139
Posts
15
Years
I need to rant a bit about "perfection."

I noticed this awhile ago, but I've been saying "perfection" a lot lately. I don't know why I say it. I don't know where it comes from, but I both type it and say it. It's something I questions constantly when I'm being bothered by my identity. And then I realized something else. Everything has to be perfect for me. Not people, but I feel like everything I do has to be perfect. The avatars I make, the stories I write out, the work I do in school, etcetera. It has to be perfect. I don't particularly care about perfection in other people. It's okay. But for me, I feel like I have to do everything accordingly perfect in my sense.

I don't know... lately I felt like I'm not good enough. Nothing I do is good enough? I don't know what else I'm supposed to say, but I just feel like I'm not good enough. Everything I do is incompetent, and that I have to do better. It's a complicated and annoying feeling.

What's the point of trying so hard when I know that no one can be "perfect"? I don't know. I just feel like I can do better. I don't put in enough effort, and that I'm incompetent. Maybe once my identity issues get better, this'll go away.
 
gimmepie

gimmepie

25,488
Posts
11
Years
Don't worry, I think this is actually a pretty common personality trait. I feel the exact same drive to be the best at everything I do that you do, even though I am aware that perfection is something that just doesn't truly exist.

Maybe it comes when people feel they have potential they don't live up to. Or that they aren't as good as they should be. Or maybe it is something that we're born with. I don't know. I think though that the important thing is to remember that all human beings are inherently flawed in one way or another and that it is a bit outlandish to expect ourselves to be above that.

Also you seem pretty cool to me, perfection or otherwise.
 
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