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I cried ;_;

Posted January 13th, 2010 at 04:56 AM by Pokémon Ranger ✩ Moriarty (✖ You Stay Classy, Professor Moriarty ✖)
Updated January 14th, 2010 at 02:21 AM by Pokémon Ranger ✩ Moriarty

SO MY LAST CHRISTMAS PRESENT ARRIVED TODAY. IT'S FROM MUM AND DAD AND WAS MADE BY AN ETSY SELLER IN AUSSIELAND AND AND AND AND I cried so hard when I opened the package because talk about always-wanted-one much? ;_______;



Spoiler:



((ARGH FFS I HATE THE STUPID EDITOR MODE ON THIS...
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I lit a wee fire...on a boat!
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Old

Funny stuff just happened.

Posted December 27th, 2009 at 10:24 AM by Pokémon Ranger ✩ Moriarty (✖ You Stay Classy, Professor Moriarty ✖)

I hope everybody had a good Christmas, or whatever you celebrate, or just a plain ol' good Winter Break! But for now, here is a word from my sponsor. All you need to know to understand this is that my Dad runs his N64 and Amiga PC on the same television.

Dad: So, to get the N64 running through the Scart socket, I plug it in, and then press AV twice, right?
Me: Yes.
Dad: Right. Well, I just want to do something on my Amiga. So I boot it up and turn the telly on and press...
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I lit a wee fire...on a boat!
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Old

Shennanigans of the Adult Kind.

Posted December 16th, 2009 at 05:23 AM by Pokémon Ranger ✩ Moriarty (✖ You Stay Classy, Professor Moriarty ✖)

You know, it's really nice to have a copy of these conversations so that when I murder my parents and have to give evidence in court my children have me committed and the doctors with the pretty white coats wonder where the insanity came from, there is some evidence that it runs in the family.

[Conversation beforehand: we were talking about my late Grandpa and the money he left behind for my Grandmother.]

Mum: It's okay. I've got it all sorted so that when I pop my clogs,...
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I lit a wee fire...on a boat!
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Old

Everybody Hates Becca!

Posted December 15th, 2009 at 05:26 AM by Pokémon Ranger ✩ Moriarty (✖ You Stay Classy, Professor Moriarty ✖)

...Otherwise known as the sitcom that is my life.

Mum: Urgh! I am never eating a pasty from that shop ever, ever again.
Dad: Devil Pasty!
Me: What if I was dangling upside down over a boiling pit of lava, and some super-villain threatened to drop me in unless you ate another one?
Dad: Sh*t happens.
Mum: Yeah, you could do with a tan.
Me: And people wonder why I have a therapist.

ON THE OTHER HAND. POSTMAN HAD PACKAGES FOR ME TODAY.
...
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I lit a wee fire...on a boat!
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Old

IMPLAUSIBLE FOX.

Posted December 9th, 2009 at 11:00 AM by Pokémon Ranger ✩ Moriarty (✖ You Stay Classy, Professor Moriarty ✖)

[Makes more sense if you've read this.]

Mum:
Look what arrived for me today! *holds up little Glaceon figurine*
Me: It's a fox!
Mum: It's a donkey.
Me: It's still a fox, no matter how many times you say it's a donkey.
Mum: Whatever.
*short pause*
*Dad walks in*
Mum: Look at this, is it a fox or a donkey?
Me: It's a fox! It's a fox made of ice!
Mum: It's a donkey! It's a blue donkey! Like Eeyore!
Dad: *looks between...
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I lit a wee fire...on a boat!
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