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Old September 16th, 2007 (10:30 AM).
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Gummy Gummy is offline
by fire be P U R G E D
Gold Tier
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: Brooklyn, NY
Age: 23
Gender: Male
Nature: Naughty
Posts: 4,533

Aww, I kinda feel bad for Jeff... But he needs to suck it up and be a man! The descriptions were better in this chapter but unless Jeff is spending a little more time in Petalburg, you should decribe the city a little more. Also, you forgot to describe Alan's clothes (I think). Overall, though, it was a great chapter. Keep up the good work and I can't wait to see when Jeff and Alan meet again!


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