View Single Post
  #56    
Old August 8th, 2010, 07:20 AM
Shiny Politoed's Avatar
Shiny Politoed
Dreamer
 
Join Date: May 2010
Location: Ice Caves
Gender: Male
Nature: Jolly
Quote:
Originally Posted by indinrio View Post
To be very frank with you, this story sounds pretty much like any typical Journeyfic with some blood and gore thrown in for no real reason other than to make it seem edgier and more mature. You stated yourself in the description that you'll be sticking largely to formula ("hooray for chilche travelling stuff"), but try to avoid that as much as possible; it really turns readers off your story when they know how everything's gonna turn out.

However, that's all I can glean from this brief description. I'm sure, as you are, that the story would look much better written out fully. Your idea of a virus driving Pokemon isn't necessarily unique, but written well it could make for an interesting plot. I would suggest you streamline the overall plot a bit by removing focus from the generic Journeyfic elements and focusing instead on the horror elements of the story, as they would probably strike people as more unique, if nothing else.

And also, one last note: make sure you use proper spelling and grammar in your story. Just spending a few seconds on Spellcheck will make your story look that much more professional.

Yeah I'm not so great with descriptions,Which is why the virus driving Pokemon dose sound overused but they way I've thought it out it quite detailed,as for the cliche journey thing its only the 3 friends traveling.For
spelling and grammar I'll definitely make sure to do that in the future.
Thank you
__________________
Reply With Quote