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Old September 27th, 2010, 01:52 PM
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Dorandragon
The Pixel Master
 
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: MSPaint
Gender: Male
Nature: Jolly
ok, I'm not much of a writter, and my spelling my not be too good, but so far this is only an outline of what what my short story "When the Hour Struck Twelve" will include. I will, when I finish writing, update this, removing the outline for the completed version. I would love any comments or critique on my story, so dont be afraid to be harsh .

David Srnovrsnik, 9/27

The night before
Night-October 30
the main charatcer invites kids from school to spend the night, promising a night of horror in the new house. play with an ouija board, and forgets to seal away teh ghosts after the summoning.

When the hour struck one
afternoon-october 31
the next day, the day of october 31st, the main character feigns sick and stays home, having a good ol' time till 1:00 in the afternoon, where they starts to hear sounds comming from other rooms, thumping stomping, and a hurried whisper. searches new house

When the hour struck two
afternoon
At two, a loud scream can be heard throught the house. it startles the main character, and the family pet had wet itself. no one else home, the banging continues, and the whispering gets louder, as if mumbling to oneself. Search continues.

When the hour struck three
midday
at three the cupboards start to open and close by themselves making a huge racket. the mumbling grows clearer and shadows begin to play in every corner.

When the hour struck four
midday
The first parent comes home, and find the "Sick" child to be wandering the house like a mad man searching frantically. when the main character asks what they are doing, main character counters with the question "can't you hear it?" finds the area where the pet soiled itself, and cleans it

When the hour struck five
midday
second parent comes home to find the first parent comforting the frantic main character. talks to parent 2 talks to parent 1 and both show obvious concern. soon, main character screams and is found hiding in a closet. police are called, and arrive within minutes, as the hour turns.

When the hour struck six
twilight
The police arrive and begin to search the house for the cause of the charatcer's distress, but after finding nothing, police leave, convinced it was a halloween prank. parents are confused and afriad for their character's sanity. religious pastor is called.

When the hour struck seven
evening
pastor arives and upon entering is struck by an invisible force, and again the cupboards start to open and close frantically. pastor regains consiousness within minutes and begins to perform an exorcism

When the hour struck eight
evening
pastor assulted with books and other loose objects as exorcism begins. character is screaming at the top of their lungs, asking for the force to just go away, the pet runs away from teh house when door opens from force. pastor tries for a little while longer.

When the hour struck nine
night
continuous assult of objects as the pastor attempts to exorcise, pastor soon grows tired of it, and leaves in a rage. when the pastor leaves all lights and electric run objects are rendered useless and wont turn on. the main character whimpers in the shadows complaining about the voices saying they will hurt them and kill them. time is taken to light candles in the house.

When the hour struck ten
night
thumps and noises seem to calm down, but chairs are found stacked on top of each other. the mian character hides in their room, and locks the door, and with no candles in their room, the main character is enshrouded by the darkness provided by the night. the only light is comming from the neighbor's house through closed shades. parents go to bed. main character attempts to sleep.

When the hour struck eleven
night
Main character woken up within minutes of falling asleep. the main character feels a very odd sense of complete horror as he stares through the darkness to try and see what might be causing his fear. shadows moves slightly to the right, and shadows murmmer to the left, feeling completely surrounded, the main character cover's their head with their sheets. hears a faint breathing sound mixed in with their irregular breathing pattern. lifts covers and continues to see nothing, but the shadows seem darker in every corner. main character tries an old trick, close your eyes and count to five and all that was scary would be gone. the main character opens their eyes to see a face not two inches from their face. the faice of a starved child, with dark eyes sunken in, and stragly long black hair. with a scream the main character struggles to fight the apparition that has hold of them. pounding on the door reveals that the parents had been woken up and were try to enter. all attempts to enter are for naught as the main character stares into the cold dead eyes of the unwanted spectre, and as it opens's it's mouth to speak, maggots fall from the rotted lips, with a hoarse and breathy murmmer the apparition says "lights out".

When the hour struck twelve
Night
as teh hour turns, the door unlocks, the lights turn on, the apparition dissapears and a loud grandfather clock strickes twelve. the parents burst into the room only to find it completely empty. searching for any signs of entry, they notice that eveything was left as it was. nothing was different from when the main character went to bed earlier that night. The kids at school still pass the story around, always told in the month of october and similar rituals played out. but they are always carefull enough to close the portal after every ouija game...
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