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Old September 11th, 2011, 05:02 AM
abnegation's Avatar
abnegation
adventure
 
Join Date: Apr 2009
Age: 21
http://i862.photobucket.com/albums/a...C303/BYOB1.png

To begin with, the tag is a little monotone, you need to go with more contrast if you're going with just one colour. My advice would be to brush in some shades of blue which are not present and then blend them to work with the tag overall. I'm also not a big fan of the blues chosen, they tend to not suit the render very well, they're really cold which doesn't suit the skin colour of your render, not to mention he is already wearing pretty cool clothes meaning that the tag is just too much of a one trick pony in terms of colour, as I say, it needs that sort of contrast which isn't eternally present.

The focal point serves the biggest issue however. Something which I've been recommending you to do is not to smother it and lower quality. While you do usually worry about the quality of the focal point more often, you still tend to smother it with odd lighting or textures. His face is very blurry, and the lighting is a little all over the place on it. The face is far too illuminated and the hair is not nearly enough, take a close look at it yourself and you'll see that there's some odd lighting on the face more over. The most sharpened point of the tag actually lies in the hand area. Which means that the focal point shifts to there, reason being is that it is the most evident point of the tag that draws the eye in most. What you're lacking here, is sharpness on your face, which should be the focal point on the render/stock. This is what you need to focus on, working on the face, ensuring it can be seen with clarity and that you have enough focus on it.

Next is the text, I'm not a huge fan of it, you have a lot of the fundamentals right when it comes to text, which is nice placement and a decent choice of font. But it could be better overall, the text is over sharpened leading to these rough edges around it, especially on the last "B". This happened when you went image > apply image to sharpen the hand area. It could be a little bigger and a little better quality, and possibly work with the colour a bit. White seems a tad generic here, not that it doesn't work, but you could possibly be more inventive. And if you can, think about getting it closer to his face if you want it to support the focal point more (if you follow earlier advice).

Next point of critique is your overall composition and consistency. The depth is decent, could be a bit better if you added some more colours, so I would advise working on adding some more depth through colours and possibly duplicating those dark areas with the Clone Tool. The tag is a tiny bit too wide, when you use negative space there needs to be a nice little transition between busy to smooth, but it's still a little too busy close to the end. Reason being is that you need the eye to stay near the focal point. You lighting is a little heavy, so tone it down a small bit. The effects are quite good, but try to tidy up that noise a small bit so that they're not smothered by loose effects, you need your effects to be pretty clean, blended, with flow, but clean. Flow is decent here, but I think you could do with a few more effects going in the direction of the render/stock, going from bottom right to top right (that's the direction of the flow).

Overall it's not a bad tag, you have a good deal of fundamentals. Just tighten up some of those points I mentioned, I mean, I've been harsh, but it should help you. Didn't point out too many good points, because it's just a decent tag overall, but every little bit that I like could be made more clear, on point and better. Good work though, just try tighten up those fundamental screws and aesthetics.
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