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Old October 10th, 2011, 07:42 PM
Skymin's Avatar
Skymin
the knight
 
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: london
Age: 21
Nature: Quirky
Nintendoshs' Jhoto: Zombiemon is accepted!
This is a lot better, thanks for fixing it up.

雷影 イチロ's Focus Shift: A New Awakening and its OOC are accepted!

Aquataris' Dimension's End is declined.
Like I said before, this has potential but the plot is extremely hard to read. I very much suggest you read it aloud (like, actually talking) and try and fix up all the grammatical errors. Most of the sentences are too flimsy and hard to put together. Seriously, read it aloud and rewrite the plot.


Miss Doronjo's Disagea: A Darkness is Reborn is accepted, d00d.
psst, you spelt disgaea wrong like... everywhere lol
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Last edited by Skymin; October 15th, 2011 at 05:37 AM.