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December 17th, 2011 (6:55 PM).
Join Date: Oct 2004
Originally Posted by
If my 14 year old announces that they will have sex no matter what I say or do, I will simply try harder to stop them. They don't have to be allowed out of the house to see friends or sleep over at other people's houses, that's a privilege. I'd rather send them to a single-gender boarding school than tell them to go for it and have to raise their brat when the consequences of their, and my, irresponsible actions caught up with them.
I think you're forgetting what it's like to be a teenager. I just have to say, most of the time, kids - and especially teenagers, who are already at a rebellious phase in their life, will only want to do something much more if you push it so hard against them that they can't do something. I agree, and totally understand where you're coming from, but if that situation arises, I actually think it's much more appropriate to do what your husband's parents did. I mean, I don't know them in person, but they seem to be coming from a different place where you think they were. If your teenager is going to have sex and is hellbent on having it, for whatever reason, chances are they're going to have it. And they aren't looking for your opinion or permission on the manner. That's just the way it is. These days, most teens have sex before they turn of legal age of consent. Wouldn't you rather be of sound mind to know that your child had protected sex rather than did it without a condom, and wouldn't you feel better to know that if they're that concerned with having it, they'd come to you about it? Most of the people I know who lost their virginity before turning 18 never told their parents about it because of how forceful they were about sex in general. I don't think you want that, do you?
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