View Single Post
  #274    
Old March 28th, 2012, 11:53 PM
dʒɹʌmpfʼt̚'s Avatar
dʒɹʌmpfʼt̚
alors on danse
 
Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: bar'jách
Age: 17
Gender: Male
Nature: Impish
SIGN ME UP OH BOY
Quote:
Originally Posted by SwiftSign View Post
Also, whilst I'm still in a semi angry state, this is my #1 Christian Pet Peeve:

"I don't pretend to say I know exactly what God wants, but I think I am saying what he wants right here."

Read as: "I don't know what God wants, but I'd guess it's exactly how I feel - and so I'll condemn you in his name."
Those aren't real and true Christians. Just saying. Trust me I know. The real mindset is more like "Holy crap guys let's go love the Bible" which is not necessarily bad (nor am I poking fun at those kinds of Christians) but it's kinda makes them look like lunatics.
Quote:
Originally Posted by QuilavaKing View Post
Why would we want to? (I'm both Gay and Christian btw.) If God supposedly gave us free will, then why has he laid out this mandate that we must love who he tells us to love? If I have to love the opposite sex to get into heaven, why can't I choose to be a girl then? And why would he care for that matter? I have never heard any reason that being Gay is bad other than "God said so." (Which he didn't.) That's just not good enough for me.
Actually yes, it does say. It's saying, "Don't do another man, because that' disgraceful". However, it says nothing about lesbians, so...

However, in Christianity, it says to do the best you can, but if you appreciate all that He is (like tolerating people *hint hint*) and try your best He'll forgive you of all the crappy aspects of yourself, like the "gay" part, or the "crack and morphine" part.
Quote:
Originally Posted by PhantomX0990 View Post
My friend and I, a long time ago, once decided that religions are potatoes.

Religions are like a sack of potatoes. You open it up and there are so many different choices for each potato.

Islam is a plain hot potato. Outside it's covered with a rough exterior skin of rituals and dogma. It's plain and to the point, and handle it too much and you're likely to be burned. It also claims to be just like the normal potatoe, but you're still likely to get burned.

Catholicism is like a loaded baked potato. This one, unlike the Islamic potatoe, has been left to cool and is 'older' than the Islamic potato. It also has a rough outer skin of rituals and dogma, but it's been opened up and 'sweetened' over time by things like sour cream, chives, butter, and cheese to make it more appealing. This is, even though it's older if you delve to far in you're still likely to get a nice burn.

Judaism is a frozen potato, it's much older than the Catholic or Islamic potato, and costs more too.

Protestants and Moderate Christians are like fast food french fries. They're a mixed up bunch, but if you look back far enough they were once a regular potato. But some have too much salt, or not enough, and some are overcooked, or cold, or soggy, or way to hot to handle. (coughWestborocoughcough).

Scientology is an empty potato sack that you have to pay to have refilled with new potatoes that are 'better' than other potatoes.

Pagans are like mashed potatoes, they look nothing like other potatoes and they have been mashed up and degraded over time.

Buddhists, Taoism, and Hinduism are Asian and don't eat potatoes, they're rice instead.





We were insane teenagers...shhhhh.
You forgot Nondenominational Christians. They're probably like fresh french fries...crunchy on the outside and soft on the inside

Also Shintoism is probably like A DELICIOUS MOCHI CAKE OH YEAH.もちもち〜〜もちがほしいですよ〜
Quote:
Originally Posted by QuilavaKing View Post
And I suppose Atheism is like not having a potato at all, so you guys get to go hungry.

Or perhaps you get to eat candy instead. Depending on how you look at it.
Nah, it's more like a sweet potato and everybody judges you because of that.

Spoiler:
Oh and speaking of, here's something I found from theoatmeal!


__________________

could you ····ing not
·

Last edited by dʒɹʌmpfʼt̚; March 29th, 2012 at 12:30 AM.
Reply With Quote