Thread: [Pokémon] Carry On, Blissey
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Old April 3rd, 2012 (04:58 PM). Edited April 3rd, 2012 by DarkIceForever.
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DarkIceForever DarkIceForever is offline
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Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: California
Gender: Female
Nature: Adamant
Posts: 117
Quote originally posted by Arcan3:
I really like this!!! Keep up the good work! This was very good story
Hey nice spam comment! >_< What did you like about the story? Why did you think it was very good?

You sir must demand this gentleman to tell you what he liked. Always, it's pretty much a useless comment. I could go anywhere else and just type in.

"Hey I loved your story!!"

See I just got away with it. You don't know if I really read your fic or not. It drives me nuts actually. Ah, not that crazy but It grinds my gears.

I liked you're story as well. Kinda nice to read about a chansey who works at a pokemon center. Can't offer more on the subject through. I think there is room for you to make more chapters. You could expose more of the reality of hospitals. They aren't happy places. People go there to die, which is sad. There is potential here in terms of making things realistic.A pidgey with a broken wing, or a pokemon in car accident. Stuff like that. Roadkill? (Ouch) I just hope you don't put pokemon and stick them into shows like House or Scrubs. lol

I found a couple of errors.

Quote:
One of my patients today include a baby chikorita.
One of my patients today included a baby chikorita.

Quote:
The shiny one in the middle, Lucky knowns how to perform aromatherapy.
Knows, not knowns. Lower case "L" and you mean luckily, right?

So it should be re-written like this: (You don't need a comma)

The shiny one in the middle luckily knows how to perform aromatherapy.

I don't know there is something about your writing style that gets me fired up, but it also makes me want to hit the back button.

I like the story, but then on the other hand I don't like the way you're presenting it. Maybe you could do better? Nah, it might just me setting high expectations on everybody again. I gotta stop doing that. Anyways, I just though you should know that.

Cheers
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