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Old May 6th, 2012 (10:19 AM). Edited May 6th, 2012 by Magdalena~.
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Magdalena~
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Join Date: Dec 2011
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Quote originally posted by Shining Raichu:
Personally I find labels incredibly helpful. I've never had a problem with labels or the practice of labelling and I wish people wouldn't be so hesitant to accept them. While I appreciate the validity of the "I am who I am, I like who I like" school of thought, I can't help but feel that unwillingness to adopt a label to describe who you are is just buckling under the pressure of the stigma that bigots put into them. It sort of feels like we're being scared out of the lingo that we use to define us, and that feels like a win for them.

Saying "I'm a guy and I like guys" and "I'm a gay/homosexual man" are essentially the same thing. "Gay" and "homosexual" are just words that have been invented to describe the former. To use the former in an active attempt to avoid labelling may seem bold and progressive in a world where our main goal is to train everybody in the art of apathy, but it just looks shame-based to me. It feels counterproductive to the point we're trying to make because we are trying to teach people to either accept or not care about who we are, but it sends mixed messages if we're not even willing to use the words ourselves.

I'm gay. That's the word I've been given to describe who I am and I use it without shame. I won't be forced into dropping that word because you have attached connotations to it that do not necessarily fit me. I'd prefer to let you get to know me and change your mind about the word instead of changing the terminology I use to make you more comfortable. Because if I'm changing myself to evade your perceptions instead of remaining stagnant and forcing you to change your perspective, then I'm giving you the balance of power. I'm not going to do that, because bigots like you have had that power for long enough.

That's how I see labels anyway. It might be different for people whose labels are less clean-cut than mine, though.
That's pretty much the point I was trying to make. I don't go as far as the people who say "I'm against labels" (like I said the word is used too loosely) but at the same time you don't have to have one word to describe yourself as in order to know what you truly are and how to be happy. I have no problem calling myself transsexual, or pansexual, or demisexual or gender fluid, even though my situation is a lot more complicated than that and can't be perfectly accurately described even by all of those words combined. But to anyone who has trouble with terms like that and can't figure out "hmmm, should I consider myself pansexual or gender fluid or what? I'm not sure! What do I do!", I simply say, "it doesn't matter. You don't need simple words if you don't want them."
So yes, personally I like labels too. However at the same time I don't think they're always necessary and while I would be wholly against doing away with them completely, they don't work for some people.
Quote originally posted by SwiftSign:
And once again, my point of people thinking they are trans just because they don't fit straight stereotypes arises ;_;.

I'm with Andy on this, after all my best friends (and many of my gay friend's circles) revolve around girls. It isn't because we are girls, it's simply because girls tend to be more understanding of gay men.
I don't think ToriSora said anything about being trans. Scarf and I simply pointed out he may be gender variant in some significant way. The reason I brought up the whole label thing was just because he seemed unsure and I wanted to convey the feeling of "no big deal, as long as you can be happy without hurting others". Also I didn't have in mind the fact that he hangs out more with girls--moreso the idea that he doesn't like being called guy/boy/man. Obviously that doesn't automatically make him trans, but I was just pointing out the possibility is all.
Quote originally posted by SwiftSign:
As to labels, whilst I think it's a good idea to have an answer to the 'who do you like?' question I don't like the idea of complicated labels. Just because you say to someone you are gay doesn't mean you have to 100% fit the idea of what 'gay' is.

Example: If you are a homo-romantic asexual: 'gay' is perfectly fitting. 'Homosexual' may not be, since it implies sexualness but there is nothing wrong with 'gay' and nobody is going to be confused.

These complicated labels just make things so specific, I'd prefer the much broader boxes with the blurred line.
I also like the blurred lines. :3 I kind of need them to describe myself with any accuracy, actually. xD
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1'08" ~ 18.7lbs ~ 50/50

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