In general it's better to post new chapters in separate posts rather than edit it into the first.
Secondly, you still haven't done that much proofreading or editing, I feel. The story still moves way too fast and there are simple mistakes in it too. Slow down to edit and take time to fully describe events.
Take this short snippet for instance:
Consider the plot too - is it that likely that two gym leaders would have been just watching a trainer and be so impressed with it catching a weak Pokemon to give them a rare dragon Pokemon? Such events (and on top of him getting three rare starter Pokemon as well) can seem questionable to the reader, and you shouldn't always hand things on a platter to your protagonist. Now, this doesn't mean you shouldn't have that happen, but if you keep it then play around with it. Will a dragon Pokemon like that necessarily get on well with a newbie trainer, for instance? But it does seem that too much is going the way of the protagonist atm, and on this:
Lastly - space out things. Use paragraph and have a line of spacing between each one (like this post and Astinus'). That way you don't have a wall of text and your story is easier to read.
But please spend more time on the story - the fact you turned out another chapter a day later and repeating the same mistakes pointed out by Astinus suggests you didn't really listen, and it's not an ideal way to maintain readers in the long run. Quality over frequency of chapters after all, and there's such a thing as too much content too quickly too.