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July 8th, 2012, 11:37 AM
Join Date: Jun 2012
Well done again! Sorry for forgettng to review the other chapters. Review for latest chapter here.
No typos that I noticed. I'd say that the first part in the new chapter was more lik a prologue than the prologue, better late than never. N(athan) is going to the Entralink? Wouldn't he have to see Fennel first and kicksome Munna? Where'd you get the nme Hilbert from? I give my characters original names like Grey or (slightly better) Chaos. Hilbert... Only the great ME beat Bianca with the dex... 156 pokemon seen 156 pokemon caught. LOL. I assume Bianca's offer was that of Prof. Juniper's assistant. Nice to see a reference to Cedric there too! He was always MY favourite prof. It seems weird that the shadow triad even need Pokemon! I alays thought they had Alakazams for telport...
Again, the chapters could be longer... And whats it assasin is N(athan)s father? Not sure I approve. No more me jabbers for today otherwise I'd have to write anothe chapter on The Hoenn dragons. Or en worse Greys Journey.
Review you later, docowocool
Proud owner of *Splash* the Magikarp and Gyarados fan club! Proud writer of Grey's Journey, The Hoenn Dragons and Pokemon Diamond Dead fan fictions. Life, don't talk to me aout life.
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