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Old August 16th, 2012, 08:13 PM
PkMnTrainer Yellow's Avatar
PkMnTrainer Yellow
RP Mentor
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Join Date: Aug 2008
Location: East Coast, USA
Gender: Female
Nature: Hardy
@Zagan: I prefer only to make rules against things that will absolutely not happen. The real stickler are going to be the powers, so if you want you can go ahead and run some powers by me to see if they'll fly before you make the SU at all. c:

My comments would be that there are three things that are very unlikely to fly off the top of my head that aren't in the rules. Those things are any sort of battle teleporting (see: teleporting that doesn't cause you to flee the battle), pokespirit independence, and characters that no longer resemble humans.

@Hovde: Hmm... Alright. You've got a great start here. Although your personality field is a bit short your character clearly has flaws appropriate and relevant to the setting and what you /do/ have is good stuff.

However, I may strongly advise that you expand on it a bit more. A well developed character will be funner for you to roleplay in the long run, I believe. As for what to write about, perhaps you could mention how he tends to get his food? Is he a scavenger that happens to be good enough to get what he wants (Even the best scavenger will constantly be in a state of mild starvation at best if they don't have some sort of pokespirit power that helps them scavenge with superhuman efficiency.)? Does he steal from others, crushing the lives of enemies under his boots to make sure he and his sister live? Or worse, has he resorted to cannibalism? You could give a simple answer and then explain why he chooses to do it the way he does. This could also be a part of his history. His history is pretty short, and I believe a good history will once again help you to have fun playing the character long term.

Does he have any major accomplishments? Minor accomplishments even? Any significant fights? How does his day-to-day life tend to go? Does he have a home of some sort or does he wander?

I'd also advise that your character's moveset is extremely offensive, and this is honestly very bad in combat. Like... Lisa's moves are much more balanced, and so she'd honestly do a lot better in any given fight. Detect and Will-O-Wisp are great moves, but I might advise a third support/defensive move of some kind. It could be hone claws, or dragon dance, or belly drum, roost, tailwind, mimic. I personally think mimic is an extremely powerful move to have, due it basically being a customizable moveslot you can change at any given time guilt free. Just any move that will let your character do something other than throw themselves at an enemy and hope the enemy doesn't have a strategy to deal with that.

Of course, if you /intended/ for him to be overly aggressive that's fine. I just don't want you to get in and realize you don't like the moves you picked in hindsight.

@Espeongirl: Greetings! I mostly have the same thing to say about your character's personality and history that I did for Hovde's. What you have is good, but I think you should try and add more substance, as it will make the character funner to roleplay in the long run. Would that be alright with you if I pushed you a bit?
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