View Single Post
Old November 23rd, 2012 (2:05 PM).
psyanic's Avatar
psyanic psyanic is offline
Join Date: May 2011
Location: The USA
Age: 20
Gender: Male
Nature: Lax
Posts: 1,283
Send a message via Skype™ to psyanic
Originally Posted by chaoticlapras View Post
...what word do you suggest?
Maybe an interjectory phrase like "no wait, that's an understatement" would work. If you just want to change the word, then it would be like "OK, that's an understatement..." Also, I think either commas or dashes around the phrase would read a bit better. Ellipses give the impression that the narrator is trailing off, but the words themselves interject in the middle of the sentence, so it would be:
Originally Posted by correction with dashes
Using some of my charcoal, I cooked some pork, and munched silently away throughout the night, slightly - OK, that's an understatement - trembling because of the freaky noises outside...
Reply With Quote