In my head I'm a professional at magic, but in the reality that exists independently of me there's nothing in which I can see myself as a professional.
Oh! Wait, I have one! I'm really professional at looking through people. I did a karate lesson once where we had to walk a line through the entire crowd while they were shouting at you and trying to get your attention and you had to just walk through and pretend they weren't there. I was the only one that could do it and was so proud of myself!