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I think this issue really shows us the beauty of language: that it is simply what we make of it. Although I wouldn't call something gay for the sake of offending others, I don't feel the slightest of regret when someone else uses the term - other than the fact that it's socially unacceptable and I tend to tune towards what society wants.
What's funny is that homosexuality is still the stigma, and it's evident from the responses that people give when being called gay. I would say that the word doesn't even matter - as long as being homo is stigmatized, there's always going to be another word used in a derogative manner.
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