I enjoyed this. I liked the battle scene and Eric was an interesting character, pretty sure that he was one of the ones that ambushed him.
Looks like you're missing a word next to various in "The narcissistic creature would tilt his head at various as he walked or battled", probably angles or times. In "he told the other train," it probably should be trainer not train. And I hate to tell you this, but it is full of words without spaces, maybe you could paste it into http://www.spellcheck.net/ before posting it?