Help with writing fanfiction.
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July 2nd, 2013, 06:38 AM
Leader of Team Swarm
Join Date: Mar 2013
Okay. I worked on the story a bit, and edited the beginning.
Adraer walked out of his home in the middle of the night. He felt an unfarmiliar presence in the field. He spun to his left as he heard the cracking of a stick. “There's something out here,” he said to himself. Adraer slowly crept towards the noise. When the source of the noise was but a yard away, Adraer lunged forward, through the bramble, at the place where the stick broke. There was a mysterious figure sprawled on the bed of leaves created by autumn. Adraer leaned forward and lifted the it. It had a human-like shape, but was small, like a child. Adraer began to walk back towards his home. When he had walked about halfway back to his house, the figure made a spastic movement and hit Adraer on the head. Adraer stumbled, dropping the animal.
“Ri-riolu,” said the figure, as it charged Adraer. Adraer rolled out of the way, narrowly escaping the animal's attack. It leaped into the air, and plunged back at Adraer. Adraer ran to escape the blow. The animal hit the ground with a thump, and didn't move. Adraer slowly removed his shirt, and stuffed the animal into it. He tied the shirt up, and returned inside. Going back to his room, Adraer threw the shirt into his closet. Adraer went back to sleep.
The next morning, Adraer showed the shirt to his mother. His mother turned severely pale, began shaking, and shouted, “GET OUT! LEAVE THIS HOUSE WITH THAT HIDEOUS THING!” Adraer, cringed, and ran away, to ____ Town. When he got there, he was still running. He ran into a man in a lab coat, and knocked him over.
“Hey, what'd you do that for?” asked the man.
“Sorry, I'm just in a hurry to get away from home,” Adraer said, while he opened the shirt to show the man what was in it, “my mom was angry and shouted at me to leave the house with it.”
“Come to my lab with me,” said the man, “I think I can help you.”
“Ok,” said Adraer, and followed the man back to the lab.
"Woah!" exclaimed Adraer, as he walked into the crisp and cool atmosphere of the lab.
"Let me see the animal you have caught," said the man, "dump it on this table, please."
"Ok," replied Adraer, gingerly pulling the animal out of the shirt and laying it down on the table.
"I've never seen one of these before. Oh, sorry for not introducing myself. My name is Professor Sycamore. I study these 'animals' called Pokemon as a profession. As you can see over there," said Professor Sycamore, pointing to a small table with three PokeBalls placed on it, meticulously spaced, "there are objects called Pokeballs. They are used to hold and capture Pokemon. That Pokemon you brought me is called Riolu. It is an extremely rare Pokemon that I have never encountered before."
I am sorry for attacking you, friend. I had ju-
"What was that?" asked Adraer, looking around. The Riolu on the table hadn't moved.
"What are you talking about?" asked Professor Sycamore, "I heard nothing."
Please listen to me.
"Okay," said Adraer. Professor Sycamore had a confused and slightly worried expression on his face.
Once again, I apologize for attacking you last night. I had just been attacked and I was scared. You saved me that night.
Suddenly, Adraer saw only black. He was running forward. He felt bushes and brambles brushing his legs, and branches hitting his head. He felt an animal fear, as though something was following him, but he felt a sense of having been here before. He heard another figure plunging through the foliage, in the same direction as he was. Adraer tripped on something, and was sent sprawling into a bramble. The figure continued approaching. Adraer felt a wind, and leaves began to hit him, cutting him like razors. Something began to walk over, and scared the figure away. Adraer fainted.
Adraer came back to the present, in the arms of Professor Sycamore. "Are you okay?" asked Professor Sycamore, "You began to make noises, and suddenly fainted."
Don't tell him what happened. That was for your eyes only.
"I don't know. I guess that all of these things that you have showed me blew my mind," replied Adraer. Suddenly, he remembered why he felt that he had been in the forest. He HAD been there before. It was the Riolu that was speaking to him through his thoughts. "Hold on," said Adraer. He walked over to the table with the Riolu on it. Adraer leaned over and whispered into its ear, "How can you talk to me?"
I can "speak" using my ability to control and sense auras. I can understand your speech, because the aura that you transmit says the same thing as what you are actually saying. I only am speaking to you because I can sense that you are pure at heart.
"Ok." said Adraer. The Riolu sprung up and stood on the table, looking around.
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