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The Discussion Thread

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Loki

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Anyway, it was posted last night, but uh... Yeah it didn't work out, so here it is again, for all to see!

Yesh, I stole the title. 'RP Plot Improvement Thread' sounded too tacky and too long- I mean, yeah. *totally not babbling*

Anyway, this thread is for posting plot's, sign-up sheets, etc, and having other's help you develop them!

Yes, this means...DON'T POST SEPERATE THREADS FOR YOUR PLOTS.

I'll try my best to give some feedback to RP's posted here, and I'd very highly appreciate it if other roleplayers, *AHEM* would help me out! ^^ It only takes a few seconds to say, 'You should expand on so-and-so', does it not? If you type at the speed of a turtle, and use your index fingers to type, I understand that it doesn't take a few seconds and you're excused.

As for all you other peoples...*ebil glare* I should hope I'm not the only person who tries to prevent all the icky seperate threads that keep popping up.

So yes, discuss, discuss, discuss! Starting now, I will close all seperate threads dealing with expansion on plots.

~ + ~

1) Take advice/criticism/help as it comes, if it bother's you, then don't make a big fuss about it. ^^ We're not all saints.
2) People who review your plot's are taking time out of their lives (yes, we have lives. >.< ...hopefully) and posting a review, so give 'em some credit, and reply as to what you think about what they said, or post up a revised version of your plot, so we don't feel like we're wasting our time.
3) Plot's discussed here, must BE here. We ain't gonna go clickin' around PC trying to find your plot.
4) Pleeease oh please oh please oh please DON'T say, "That sucks," or, "I like it". For one, you'll get in trouble for the character limit, for two, you'll get a very pissed Bijou on your tail, and for three, that's not help, advice, or criticism in the least.
5) If nobody replies to your plot, then good places to look are the 'Bad Habit's of RPers' thread, 'The Rules' and the rest of the stickied threads, because they usually include things that can help improve your plot.
6) Whiny people, you don't belong here. I don't tolerate whiny people. >.< Come on, we're all of age and we all know how to act mature, and if you don't, go learn how.
 
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Phanima

That servant of the evil one
1,567
Posts
18
Years
  • Age 34
  • Seen Oct 11, 2011
I was thinking of making another Naruto RP, since I missed out on the last one. But I thought I'd just make it simple so that people won't get confused. It's based on the Chunin Exam. It will involve all three stages of the exam but I've yet to write them up yet. I've just completed the plot, rules, and sign-up sheet and was wondering if anyone could give some feedback on it so far. I'm planning for this RP to be short but exciting. This is all I've done for now. Comments, criticisms, corrections, and improvements are welcome.

Plot:

To become a Chunin, a Genin must participate and fulfil the requirements of the "Chunin Exam". The exam is constructed through three separate tests. The first stage tests a Genin's information gathering abilities and decision making abilities. The second stage tests a Genin's abilities in carrying out a mission while also following strict guidelines. The third and final stage tests a Genin's skill and abilities in combat against other ninja. The third stage fights are carried out by the passing participants from the first two stages of the exam. Judges then decide those who have displayed Chunin-like attributes and are then appointed by the leading village's Kage as official Chunin.

The recent establishment of the Hidden Village of Oni has sparked the attention of other neighbouring countries and Hidden Villages. The leading ninja, Joukaikage, has offered to host the next Chunin Exam in an attempt to establish new relations with the other Hidden Villages. Representatives from each Hidden Village have been chosen to participate in the latest Chunin Exam.

Rules:

1. Be considerate of other characters and their abilities as well as not going overboard with your own.

2. Controlling other people's characters is prohibited, unless they are in a direct fight with your own. Even then the amount of influence in your writing must be limited.

3. Relationships with others are fine but keep it sensible.

4. There will be excessive descriptions of violence. If that bugs you then do not participate.

5. If a fight does occur between characters then I will conduct a randomised selection to decide who will win. Once it's decided, the characters involved will continue to post so that the winner is established in the story.

6. Spelling, grammar, and vocabulary are important. Make sure your posts are adequate so that they are legible and understandable.

7. I plan for this RP to be quick and eventful. Some characters will be eliminated from the exam and thus the RP. I will decide randomly (eg. drawing names out of a hat, using a number generator, etc.) on who will be removed. Once I've chosen the person(s), he/she will be able to make one or two final posts on how their character dies or is removed.

8. Read the rules and make sure you understand them. If you don't like them then don't join. That means you should understand that people will die and/or be removed, and if that's you, do not complain. You have been warned.

Sign-up Sheet:

Name: Your character's first, middle, and/or last name.

Age: How young/old your character is.

Physical Description: What your character looks like (clothes and physical descriptions). Pictures can be used, but provide them through a link.

Personality: How does your character act and what does he/she feel (eg. likes, dislikes, etc.).

History: Your character's past.

Hidden Village: The village your character comes from.

Ninjutsu: What type of Ninjutsu can your character use (include its name and how it works). Your character can only know three or less Ninjutsu.

Taijutsu: What type of Taijutsu can your character use (include its name and how it works). Your character can only know one Taijutsu.

Genjutsu: What type of Genjutsu can your character use (include its name and how it works). Your character can only know two or less Genjutsu.

Blood Inheritance Limit: Your character's specific clan ability. Everyone can have one, but if I find your's to be too over-powered then I will request you to edit it. If not, then you will have to remove it completely.

Fighting Style: How does your character fight by using Ninjutsu, Taijutsu, and/or Genjutsu.

Strengths: Your character's strong points (eg. emotional, physical, fighting style, etc.).

Weaknesses: Your character's weak points (eg. emotional, physical, fighting style, etc.).
 

JBCBlank

Satanist to the core.
2,208
Posts
18
Years
ok, the thing is that I"m planning an Rp based on this... but I need help, so anyone who is willing please help me make this one that people will jump onto! (oh... I also posted this before, but it accedently got deteted, so if you posted before could you post again please. ^_^" and I took Bijou's advice and made it all the plot! do you like it?)

Dessert Rose.
(Spirits Captured, Powers given, a world worth saving? You decide!)

The fabled Treasure Island, once a pirates paradise, now… the only refuge for the Animaigus, the spirit people, once a thriving people they are now in hiding living in constant fear of the Shiroku. The Shiroku started the War, the War of a thousand lives, the Shiroku have been using the Animaigus's powers to take over countries and leave ruin of any town, city or village that gets in there way. As the Shiroku destroy more countries they grow stronger, and as they grow stronger the captured Animaigus get weaker. If left to do as they wish the Shiroku will destroy the Animaigus and take over the already buckled world.

The Animaigus fear for there captured comrades and know of no way to save them, all they know is that if they were to find humans who are good of heart and pure of mind, that they might stand a chance of saving them. The leader of the Animaigus, (Sephiroth ~ Final Fantasy VII), had a meeting with all the Animaigus to decree that he believes that it would be best if they were to send one of there own out into the harsh world of the unknown to find those few humans that have the hearts to use the powers of the Animaigus to their fullest. After much discussion they decided to send Sephiroth to find the ones to help defeat the Shiroku. Leaving Cloud in charge Sephiroth flew off to find the ones to save their friends and stop the War once and for all.

Be one of those few that will save this undeserving world. Or if you wish you can leave the earth to be destroyed and flee with the Animaigus to another dimension after saving the Tortured Ten, (Buttercup ~ Powerpuff girls; Mario ~ Mario Brothers; Luffy ~ One Piece; Shun ~Saint seiya; Link ~ Legend of Zelda; Cosmo ~ Fairy Godparents; Peter Pan ~ Disney's Peter Pan; Pikachu ~ Pokemon; Patamon ~ Digimon; DarkMagician ~ Yu-Gi-Oh).


It needs more I just can't put my finger on it...
Anything you have to say will help.


Skrew this idea... no one likes it anyway... you know I might stop Rping all together... no one want's to Rp with me...
 
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Loki

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6,829
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Toomi: Hmm...to lengthen it, you should probably describe the parts of the exam as in, what they actually are, or if you don't want to reveal that...>.< Hmmm...
or list the participating villages, considering not all hidden village's participate.
 

Alter Ego

that evil mod from hell
5,751
Posts
18
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*Ebil glared* Nyah, I'm all for the extinction of pointless thread bunches, so you can count me in for as much as my free time will allow. I'll try to comment on as many of the plots as possible, but do remember that I'm still a human (Make that a human who's nearing his end-of-year exams and severly behind on his labwork) so I won't always provided instant response and my comments might be less-than-diplomatic at times. If you get such, just try to focus on the essence (Ergo, the flaws I point out and the things that I suggest adding/expanding upon) and try not to take it too personally. Believe it or not, my main interest is to see people improve, honest. ^^

@ Toomi: Nyah, it's a simple but functional concept, as long as you have enough material in your mind to keep the pace up. My biggest issue is killing off RPers (Particularly making the killings completely random) as I'm very much pro-life as far as RP characters are concerned, and I think that it might discourage people from joining to know that the characters on which they have worked for goodness knows how long can be killed off at any moment by the toss of a coin. That aside, you could improve on the plot size a bit by giving some background information for those who aren't that familiar with Naruto (Poor souls ;__; ) such as what being a ninja in that world is all about, why so many people would aspire to such a dangerous occupation, the basics of chakra and maybe even some brief descriptions of the different styles. The more RPer-friendly the sign-up process is, the more people will feel inclined to join. ^^

@ JBCBlank: What this plot needs is to start being original and stop swiping stuff from everyone and his friend. First of all, where is this treasure island? Why is it called the treasure island? What are the Shiroku? Why is Sephiroth (The evil, genetically engineered, bad guy of doom with the god complex and the humungous sword who previously tried to destroy a whole planet in order to gain power) suddenly the leader of a bunch of random oppressed people (And what's with the spirit people thing, do you mean like dead folks or what?)? And how on earth can you justify Cloud co-operating with his arch-nemesis? (Last I checked, he was quite busy trying to chop Sephiroth into little chunky bits to get rid of his own inner darkness). Not only does it go completely against Sephiroth's personality and lone-wolf attitude (Not to mention his history with Cloud), but the oppressed people go under a name that I've, thus far, only seen in Harry Potter books. -.- Furthermore, how the heck did characters from completely unrelated worlds suddenly end up in the same place and become refered to collectively and why would the animagi (Still a HP ripp-off) give a rat's arse about them? Your 'plot' has no context, no structure, and no point. It's like KH without the awesome music, well-developed plot and fancy battle system, and that sucks. All you've done is slap together a bunch of random characters and places (None of which, I believe, are of your own design) and then call it a plot.

My advice? Just scrap it and consider a little something called 'logic' next time. Trust me, it would do you a world of good. -.- (By the way, dessert is something you eat, I believe you were aiming for the Desert rose which is, among other things, a special item in FF VII. Say no to plagiarism.)
 
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Loki

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*Ebil glared* Nyah, I'm all for the extinction of pointless thread bunches, so you can count me in for as much as my free time will allow.

YOSH! THAAAAAANK YOU. You are teh awesomeness. (Yes. Teh.) Now, does anybody else want to be awesome like this good sir here?

@ Toomi: Nyah, it's a simple but functional concept, as long as you have enough material in your mind to keep the pace up. My biggest issue is killing off RPers (Particularly making the killings completely random) as I'm very much pro-life as far as RP characters are concerned, and I think that it might discourage people from joining to know that the characters on which they have worked for goodness knows how long can be killed off at any moment by the toss of a coin. That aside, you could improve on the plot size a bit by giving some background information for those who aren't that familiar with Naruto (Poor souls ;__; ) such as what being a ninja in that world is all about, why so many people would aspire to such a dangerous occupation, the basics of chakra and maybe even some brief descriptions of the different styles. The more RPer-friendly the sign-up process is, the more people will feel inclined to join. ^^

Hmm...I personally like the idea of getting killed off *would volunteer* but that's just me. xD It just seems like something that doesn't happen in RP's...ever! I've never been in an RP with a character death. But something you could explain about Naruto is the Chuunin Exam in itself. I think what you should do with the killing off of the characters is make it random, and ask the RPer if they're okay with it. And, if needed, the killing off option is something that can be used with someone that's nagging everyone, or just messing everything up and ruining the whole thing. It's an easier way to let them off then just saying up to their face 'You suck. Go die.' *Kay, that was blunt, but still.*

But I guess it's not a good thing to hide to them that they suck...well, I dunno. Ignore that last part then. xD
 

JBCBlank

Satanist to the core.
2,208
Posts
18
Years
@ JBCBlank: What this plot needs is to start being original and stop swiping stuff from everyone and his friend. First of all, where is this treasure island? Why is it called the treasure island? What are the Shiroku? Why is Sephiroth (The evil, genetically engineered, bad guy of doom with the god complex and the humungous sword who previously tried to destroy a whole planet in order to gain power) suddenly the leader of a bunch of random oppressed people (And what's with the spirit people thing, do you mean like dead folks or what?)? And how on earth can you justify Cloud co-operating with his arch-nemesis? (Last I checked, he was quite busy trying to chop Sephiroth into little chunky bits to get rid of his own inner darkness). Not only does it go completely against Sephiroth's personality and lone-wolf attitude (Not to mention his history with Cloud), but the oppressed people go under a name that I've, thus far, only seen in Harry Potter books. -.- Furthermore, how the heck did characters from completely unrelated worlds suddenly end up in the same place and become refered to collectively and why would the animagi (Still a HP ripp-off) give a rat's arse about them? Your 'plot' has no context, no structure, and no point. It's like KH without the awesome music, well-developed plot and fancy battle system, and that sucks. All you've done is slap together a bunch of random characters and places (None of which, I believe, are of your own design) and then call it a plot.

My advice? Just scrap it and consider a little something called 'logic' next time. Trust me, it would do you a world of good. -.- (By the way, dessert is something you eat, I believe you were aiming for the Desert rose which is, among other things, a special item in FF VII. Say no to plagiarism.)

Um, #1, it's Animaigus. #2, in case you are blind, the Shiroku are the main bad guys that are draining the energy of the torchered ten for there own evil bidding. #3, Nobody know's were Treasure Island is, that's why the Animaigus went there in the first place. #4, it's still a work in progress. #5, The Animaigus are so few that there is no rivalry, they only have eachother so they have to rely on there enemy's. #6, I chose Shephiroth because he's the only one that can mingle with normal folks withouth being noticed, fly across seas, and protect himself alone.

and by the way, Desert Rose is also; A song, A book, And a very delectible dish! (plagiarism is impossible in this situation!)

The only thing I can possibly thank you for is the help with the spelling... I know I suck at spelling, tell me something I don't know!

~JBCBlank

**edit: I almost forgot, the saying goes, "Everyone and his kid brother."
 

parallelzero

chelia.blendy
14,631
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20
Years
Um, #1, it's Animaigus. #2, in case you are blind, the Shiroku are the main bad guys that are draining the energy of the torchered ten for there own evil bidding. #3, Nobody know's were Treasure Island is, that's why the Animaigus went there in the first place. #4, it's still a work in progress. #5, The Animaigus are so few that there is no rivalry, they only have eachother so they have to rely on there enemy's. #6, I chose Shephiroth because he's the only one that can mingle with normal folks withouth being noticed, fly across seas, and protect himself alone.

and by the way, Desert Rose is also; A song, A book, And a very delectible dish! (plagiarism is impossible in this situation!)

The only thing I can possibly thank you for is the help with the spelling... I know I suck at spelling, tell me something I don't know!

~JBCBlank

**edit: I almost forgot, the saying goes, "Everyone and his kid brother."
No, he gave you lots of useful info. You just brushed it off and attacked him for what you could. You wanted critisism, then accept it. Don't whine like a little kid because you aren't perfect.

...And if you know you suck at spelling, why haven't you bothered fixing it? Go read a book or something, it helps with that sort of thing.
 

JBCBlank

Satanist to the core.
2,208
Posts
18
Years
No, he gave you lots of useful info. You just brushed it off and attacked him for what you could. You wanted critisism, then accept it. Don't whine like a little kid because you aren't perfect.

...And if you know you suck at spelling, why haven't you bothered fixing it? Go read a book or something, it helps with that sort of thing.

Ouch.... God, i must be sleepyer then I thought.. I don't really remember typing that... hmmm... btw.. I asked for help, not critisism... and if I could get better at spelling by reading I would have won the nationaly spelling bee by now... I just suck at it... well, I'm trashing the idea anyway..... I think I'll start something based on final fanticy, I know that game more... oh yeah.. I attacked him because I don't like being told that I'm stealing.. I havn't even played Kingdom H. how should I know what kind of game it is.

~JBCBlank
 
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Netta

Hikari Ko
152
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18
Years
Okay, let's move to another subject. *giggles nerviously*

So, one quick question. I've already posted my plot in the other forum for which I come back to find it closed so. . . do I repost it again or do I just say, can I get some advice on my plot???
 

Phanima

That servant of the evil one
1,567
Posts
18
Years
  • Age 34
  • Seen Oct 11, 2011
My biggest issue is killing off RPers (Particularly making the killings completely random) as I'm very much pro-life as far as RP characters are concerned, and I think that it might discourage people from joining to know that the characters on which they have worked for goodness knows how long can be killed off at any moment by the toss of a coin.

I've thought about that and I think I won't incorporate the killing off RP-ers until later into the exam and such. I've just found that in some of the RPs, such as the previous Naruto one and the Mario (Legend of the Falling Star or something like that) attracted a lot of RP-ers. The use of the killing system would be able to control the amount of people participating in case it gets out of hand. My main intention was to only implement the "killing off characters" idea near the end or when something big happens, such as fights and whatnot. I'll continue finishing the plot and the general information and see where it takes me.

Hmm...I personally like the idea of getting killed off *would volunteer* but that's just me. xD It just seems like something that doesn't happen in RP's...ever! I've never been in an RP with a character death. But something you could explain about Naruto is the Chuunin Exam in itself. I think what you should do with the killing off of the characters is make it random, and ask the RPer if they're okay with it. And, if needed, the killing off option is something that can be used with someone that's nagging everyone, or just messing everything up and ruining the whole thing. It's an easier way to let them off then just saying up to their face 'You suck. Go die.' *Kay, that was blunt, but still.*

I also have enjoyed the idea of seeing some characters in an RP being killed off or removed, since it would add a lot more pace and excitement to the plot. That's my opinion anyway. But again, like Alter Ego said, some people might not appreciate their specially built-up and incredibly detailed characters being wiped out just to make the story more interesting. Of course, I did imply that if people were to join the RP, they are to expect the chance of being removed, as I did give a warning. So if they are willing enough to participate and understand that there is a chance (and that's all it is, a chance) of their character being killed then everything should be alright. But for now I'll just continue to work on it and make a final decision once I get some confirmation on the finished version.

So, one quick question. I've already posted my plot in the other forum for which I come back to find it closed so. . . do I repost it again or do I just say, can I get some advice on my plot???

Um, I'm not really sure but I think it would be best if you could give us a link to where you posted it so we don't have to keep going back to read it. But I'm pretty sure you can just repost it here since it'll make things a lot easier for those who want to read over it.
 

Alter Ego

that evil mod from hell
5,751
Posts
18
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@JBCBlank:
**edit: I almost forgot, the saying goes, "Everyone and his kid brother."

No it doesn't, that's an alltogether different saying. -.- But you probably wouldn't know it, seeing as how you don't even know how to spell "pity". I'd go into depth about how much wrong there is in what you just wrote (And how you managed to completely ignore the whole point of my comments) but since Origin summed it up very nicely, I'll just say this: if this is the kind of attitude that you keep when RPing then it's no wonder that no-one wants to play with you, so yes, by all means quit RPing and come back when you've matured enough to tolerate some feedback besides meaningless praise, I don't deal in that. Believe it or not, criticism is the best kind of help that a writer can get, but if you can't appreciate it then I won't waste my time on you. <.<

@Toomi: Nyah, if the RPers are okay with characters dying then it's all fine and dandy, my issue was mostly with the randomness aspect. And yes, I have seen this done occassionally (I think there was an RP about the Ragnarok (From Nordic mythology) in which the first line of the plot was basically "Right, no-one is going to make it out of this alive, so make your deaths grand."), but I've never seen those RPs get far, so I dunno'. It is a nice N00B-elimination method, though, and the people who fail to spot it in the rules have only themselves to blame (You shouldn't go singing up for things you don't understand), but as long as it's voluntary I don't see it as an issue, and neither should RPers. ^^
 
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Loki

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^__^;;;

I asked for help, not critisism... and if I could get better at spelling by reading I would have won the nationaly spelling bee by now...

I would just accept Alter Ego's criticism, because it's really actually quite in depth, and would really make your plot in general better. And as for the spelling thing, I would just use a spell-checker if you suck in general. If you don't have Microsoft Word or Appleworks or something like that, try an online spell-checker. It makes it easier for everyone. ^^

I've decided to put up some rules, FYI, so please do read them. Hopefully I don't sound like a pompous prick, if I do, then all my sincerest apologies.

As Netta said, then? Off to a different subject.

Toomi: Can't wait to see the finished product! I'll have to make room in my schedule to join...

Netta: It's probably best if you re-post it here. It's not that hard, as the thread hasn't disappeared yet, and it's easier for the people giving their time and energy to give feedback. Save them a click or two, because I personally hate surfing around trying to find the right thread, post, and plot. Don't you? ^^
 

Phanima

That servant of the evil one
1,567
Posts
18
Years
  • Age 34
  • Seen Oct 11, 2011
Plot:

To become a Chunin, a Genin must participate and fulfil the requirements of the "Chunin Exam". The exam is constructed through three separate tests. The first stage tests a Genin's information gathering abilities and decision making abilities. The second stage tests a Genin's abilities in carrying out a mission while also following strict guidelines. The third and final stage tests a Genin's skill and abilities in combat against other ninja. The third stage fights are carried out by the passing participants from the first two stages of the exam. Judges (or Jonin) then decide those who have displayed Chunin-like attributes and are then appointed by the leading village's Kage as official Chunin.

The three-stage exam incorporates the main skills, abilities, and ideas every professional ninja should understand. How to store, release, and control Chakra, making decisive decisions during missions, and understanding the situation to find the best possible and successful outcome, are three examples of Chunin-like attributes all ninja should acquire. Each stage of the exam will test these three and a number of other examples. Through this examination of abilities, instincts, and intelligence, the judges will determine who has what it takes to become a Chunin.

The recent establishment of the Hidden Village of Oni has sparked the attention of other neighbouring countries and Hidden Villages. The leading ninja, Joukaikage, has offered to host the next Chunin Exam in an attempt to establish new relations with the other Hidden Villages. Representatives from each Hidden Village have been chosen to participate in the Chunin Exam and have begun their latest mission residing in the Hidden Village of Oni.

Your role will be to become a participating Genin in the latest Chunin Exam. Each of you will arrive at the Hidden Village of Oni as representatives from your chosen Hidden Villages (you may also be a Genin from the Hidden Village of Oni). You will be participating in the events of the Chunin Exam as a training Genin with the hopes of becoming a Chunin or for other personal reasons.

Extra Information:

This is for those who are unfamiliar with the plot, concepts, and ideas of the manga and anime of Naruto. These definitions are examples of the number of terms used in the world of Naruto and in this RP.

Genin: There are six "official" rankings of ninja which determine how strong or skilled he/she is (although some Genin may be stronger than other higher ranking ninja). Genin are the second-lowest level of ninja.

Chunin:
Chunin are the third-lowest level of ninja and are above Genin.

Jonin: Jonin are the fifth-lowest level of ninja and are above Chunin and Genin.

Kage: Kage are the highest level of ninja and are above Jonin, Chunin, and Genin.

The Hidden Village of Oni:
This is a made up village used for this RP. It does not exist in the actual Naruto manga or anime.

Other information on specific parts of the series can be located at the following links (and yes, I'm aware that Wikipedia isn't the best of resources but it was the only one that had this kind of information): Ninja Rankings, Hidden Villages, Ninjutsu, Genjutsu, Taijutsu, and Kekkai Genkai (Blood Inheritance Limit).

Rules:

1. Be considerate of other characters and their abilities as well as not going overboard with your own.

2. Controlling other people's characters is prohibited, unless they are in a direct fight with your own. Even then the amount of influence in your writing must be limited.

3. Relationships with others are fine but keep it sensible.

4. Each character can only know a maximum of six different techniques altogether (eg. 2 Ninjutsu and 2 Taijutsu and 2 Genjutsu, or 1 Ninjutsu and 3 Taijutsu and 2 Genjutsu, or 3 Ninjutsu and 3 Taijutsu and 0 Genjutsu, etc.).

5. There can be no relations to characters from the manga or anime of Naruto. This is an OC (original character) RP with Naruto concepts.

6. There will be excessive descriptions of violence. If that bugs you then do not participate.

7. If a fight does occur between characters then I will conduct a randomised selection to decide who will win. Once it's decided, the characters involved will continue to post so that the winner is established in the story.

8. Spelling, grammar, and vocabulary are important. Make sure your posts are adequate so that they are legible and understandable.

9. I plan for this RP to be quick and eventful. Some characters will be eliminated from the exam and thus the RP. I will decide randomly (eg. drawing names out of a hat, using a number generator, etc.) on who will be removed. Once I've chosen the person(s), he/she will be able to make one or two final posts on how their character dies or is removed. This rule will apply during the ending parts of the RP or when a significant event occurs (eg. fights between characters, unexpected events, etc.).

10. Read the rules and make sure you understand them. If you don't like them then don't join. That means you should understand that people will die and/or be removed, and if that's you, do not complain. You have been warned.

Sign-up Sheet:


Name: Your character's first, middle, and/or last name.

Age: How young/old your character is.

Gender: What is your character's gender (male/female).

Physical Description: What your character looks like (clothes and physical descriptions). Pictures can be used, but provide them through a link.

Personality: How does your character act and what does he/she feel (eg. likes, dislikes, etc.).

History: Your character's past.

Clan: The clan your character belongs to.

Hidden Village: The village your character comes from.

Ninjutsu: What type of ninja techniques can your character use (include its name and how it works). Your character can only know three or less Ninjutsu.

Taijutsu: What type of hand-to-hand combat techniques can your character use (include its name and how it works). Your character can only know three or less Taijutsu.

Genjutsu: What type of illusionary techniques can your character use (include its name and how it works). Your character can only know three or less Genjutsu.

Blood Inheritance Limit: Your character's specific clan ability. Everyone can have one, but if I find your's to be too over-powered then I will request you to edit it. If not, then you will have to remove it completely.

Strengths: Your character's strong points (eg. emotional, physical, fighting style, etc.).

Weaknesses: Your character's weak points (eg. emotional, physical, fighting style, etc.).

It's practically the same as the first one but with a bit more detail and information in some areas.

That aside, you could improve on the plot size a bit by giving some background information for those who aren't that familiar with Naruto (Poor souls ;__; ) such as what being a ninja in that world is all about, why so many people would aspire to such a dangerous occupation, the basics of chakra and maybe even some brief descriptions of the different styles.

By increasing the plot in general, I didn't really do much except regurgitate the same information I wrote before into a now smaller paragraph. I've added some general information in the "Extra Information" section and also added in some links that might be relevant to some terms that are in the RP.

Overall though, I'm afraid that the whole RP might seem a little big and that might minimize the amount of people who will even bother to participate, but that's just my opinion. I've pretty much completed the form unless anyone has anymore criticism or comments they'd like to make to help improve it a little. So all I have to do now is work on how the first and second stages of the exam work. And if anyone has any ideas about what the stages should be about, that'd help.
 
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Loki

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8OOOOOOOOO *MUST. JOIN.*

xD *tranquilized* I think people really should learn how to read and not be afraid of long plots. The RP sounds like SO much fun. There's probably more to improve on, but I just can't put my finger on it right now. It actually looks good to me though. I'm sure someone who'd never watched Naruto would be able to RP without any major freak-out's. The links in the extra information section is probably going to be useful for RPer's who already know about Naruto anyway. (I know I don't remember nearly every friggin technique I see.)

I find it easier to bold the main topics on a sign-up sheet, that way you can see them better, but that's not really a big issue. Just a suggestion.
 

YoshiRiRu

xX~Lord of the Storm~Xx
263
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  • Age 32
  • Seen Jan 27, 2016
Aiight, Bijou. Sign me up as a helper. Also, I've got a plot I'd like you and Alter to check out... Gimme a bit to type it out.
 

Midnight_Dragon249

AGUryuka/LOPvalkus/GUILxeros
352
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18
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Okay, I have a few ideas here...

First is the one no one liked, but with a major plot adjustment. And if no one still doesn't like it, I'll go ahead and kill the idea entirely. It's still the same place, same EVERYTHING (well, almost), but new plot. It's more based on my fic I'm writing, that shall never see this place, unless I really feel like posting it. Meh, I'll post it in a bit. Well, the first part. ...Enough babbling.

~
There is a legend in the world of Aedrys, speaking of a great war between the East and West over three mystic blades created by the God and Goddesses of this world. These three swords were the Blade of the Sun, the blade a blazing red-orange, was able to harness the Sun's great fury and call forth blazing rain, or create a blinding beam of light, and said to be forged by the Sun Goddess, Solarrin. There was the Blade of the Moon, a dazzling blue, forged by the Moon Goddess, Lunaria, said to be able to warp its wielder between any place instantaneously, as well as the wielder being able to warp the blade anywhere they wish. The last blade was The Blade of the Void, the blade a wicked black, created by the Shadow God, Kageriin, and was able to control shadows like puppets, as well as topple entire buildings with a single slash. If these three swords were ever brought together, an even greater power would be brought into the world, under the blades' wielder's control, but this power was described simply 'Only one pure of soul shall not bring ruin to the world. Twisted of heart, or selfish of intention shall ruin the world and destroy themselves. To right this wrong, the pure must gather the blades of legend'. The three blades had been hidden by their forgers, never to be found, unless the time truly came when the whole of Aedrys was threatened. However, the greed of men did not heed these warnings, and sought the blades' great power.

This war raged for many years, until the West finally had all three blades in their possession. The West's king, a cruel Muro with a twisted heart had killed countless people, both innocent and warring. He craved only power, and didn't care what he had to do to get it. Once the three legendary blades were place together, they had vanished, and in their place was a great monster, a reflection of the king's lust for power. The beast, black as the king's heart, swallowed him up in dark tendrils sprouting from its body. The survivors of this incident named the beast, Exittaddo, 'Bringer of Destruction.' This monster then destroyed the West's capital, Doran, and the only thing that had stopped it was the Goddesses and God descending to Aedrys and destroying the wicked beast, but destroying their physical forms in the process. Their spirits took refuge in the blades they had forged, sealing the monster in a blade of its own, called the Arcumbre. This blade was made sure to be hidden well, as the Goddesses and God didn't have power to stop the beast again. The only way to access this blade was to bring together the three original blades at the Arcumbre's temple. To help guard the four blades, they 'touched' three people of Aedrys, of three different races, giving each and their bloodline a special ability, but this power has since faded from the bloodlines.

The people of Aedrys had then agreed to peace, not wanting a repeat incident. They rebuilt Doran, now a technological metropolis, and the three 'descendants' had guarded the blades, until, after a while, the people had forgotten the war and simply marked it down as a myth. The descendants, too, had forgotten where the swords rested, so the God and Goddesses used a bit more of their remaining powers to create special creatures, bound to the blades, and they were meant to keep all but the blades' respective descendants from ever entering the resting places.

One thousand years after the war was forgotten, the bloodlines no longer clearly identifiable, and the resting places left to ruin, the bloodline possessing Kageriin's power unknowingly found the Blade of the Void and took it from its shrine. Seeing the blade's great power, she began to feel the same lust for power as the ancient Muro king. The blade's guardian sensed this, but was powerless against the Blade of the Void. She had remembered the old legend, and craved the other blades' powers. This girl, a Kuria name Kurozyn, only 17, began to destroy other villages and towns, searching for the other descendants. Kageriin's spirit watched in horror as his power was being used to destroy the world he had helped create. He attempted to warn the Goddesses, and told them to somehow have their descendants claim the blades and defeat Kurozyn, whose fighting class has seemed to go out of normal people's abilities. She has the ability to call down ferocious beasts, as well as cast all elemental magic. Her skills with the sword are better than that of a well-trained swordmaster. After hearing of the descendants claiming the other two blades, Kurozyn had fled deep in the Demon's Maw Mountains. Using water and wind magic, she can view the descendants and attempt to kill them by controlling monsters she had created. But, unfortunately for the descendants, they have no knowledge of Kurozyn's location or abilities.

You play as either the Sun or Moon descendants, (if those spots are left) or one of their teammates. You will all travel as a Slayer group, people who kill monsters and protect travelers from attacks. This way, you will gain experience and knowledge from battles, to prepare you for the showdown with Kurozyn.

Name-Character's name
Gender-Dude or Dude-ett?
Race-Options in a min.
Personality-Err, you should know this.
Description-Make it race specific, but you can add your chara's personal touches.
Class-Just wait a sec, 'kay?
RP Sample-Just as long as you make decent posts and can spell...
Bloodline-I just need someone to take the place of the Sun descendant, which is a Veinn.

Races~

Humua-Human. That's about it.
Kuria-Full blood elf. They're tall, slender, and not harsh on the eyes.
KuKuria-Humua with longer, pointy ears, so half-elf, basically.
Lieroso-Animal people, y'know, human with animal attributes?
Veinn-Dragon-Humans. Because I love dragons. And veinn cannot fly. They can hover and glide, but cannot freely fly. Their faces are more human than dragon, and their skin can be whatever color you want. Their wings are generally small, and they have tails. Their ears are...like a two feathered wing...like...ear.If you want a Veinn chara, please follow the description.
Muro-Demonic people, with horns, fangs, a slender tail, claws, ect. And they don't wear shoes. Their claws on their feet would just rip 'em.
Dragon-I only added this race because I have many a dragon character, so I thought that it would feel odd to me with no dragons. But please, I don't want 7 people wanting to be dragons. Anyways, dragons in Aedrys can wear clothes if they want to, although they usually don't. They're not very bulky, and stand on two feet. Their 'ears' can rage from two horns to cat-like ears, to nothing at all. Dragons also can have some sort of 'hairdo' such as Taiik. Don't mind the little wings. I just doodled that. And didn't bother with the wings too much. Then there's Guardian, who wears a shirt (and pants, you just can see that.) has no fuzz, and has two horns for 'ears'. So there ya go.

So, if you want the most freedom with your chara, choose Humua, or KuKuria.

NOW, classes.

Warrior
Physical combat specialist. High power and defense. Can use heavier armor, and can use just about any type of weapon.

Chaos Mage
Black magic specialist. Able to cast impairing and destructive magic. Can't use strong armor, but can use a dagger, as well as a stave or wand.

Healing Mage
White magic specialist. Able to cast healing and repairing magic. Can't use strong armor or weapons.

Spell Blade
Varied specializations. Able to cast weak white and black magic, and also able to use stronger weapons and armors, such as Scale Mail, one-handed axes, and one-handed swords.

Ninja
A very agile class, allowing use of some black magic and daggers.

Assassin
Agile, like the Ninja class, but uses hand-to-hand, throwing daggers, and poisons in battle.

Musician {This class isn't a rip off of 'Soul Purpose.' I had this written down before it was ever posted.}
Odd specialization. Controls magic by playing certain types of music. Depending on what mood and beat the song has, different magic is used. Plus, you won't get very bored.

Tamer
Tamers specialize in bows, and crossbows. They have no magic access, but have the ability to tame a wild creature to do their bidding. There may sound like no need for this class, with the use of Cyrun Gems, but Tamers can tame monster, creature, or animal.

Summoner
Summoners call forth both creatures from Cyrun Gems and can tap into the elemental streams to create powerful monsters of their own creation. Summoners can also wield both white and black magic, but their spells are weaker than a Chaos Mage's or a Healing Mage's.

Engineer

This class specializes in creating machines and AI robots to do their bidding. Engineers can create anything from a simple sword to a giant mechanical dragon. They can also make convenient gadgets, such as a "magic" map, that shows the owner's location, along with anyone in that person's group.

Thief
An offshoot of the Ninja and Assassin classes. Thieves are very agile, and can use daggers in both combat and as a long range weapon. They can't use poisons, but have skills that allow them to steal items and money from monsters.


TOWN DESCRIPTON~And I will scan the map I drew, just as soon as I get to a scanner. And this is all that was left after Kurozyn's little killing spree.

Eeshi
Small port town on the West coast.

Zeinfel
Medium resort town on Teiyaros Island. Teiyaros is a relatively small island, north of Eeshi.

Doran
Large industrial city.

Sheiru
Small village in the middle of the Great Plains.

Reito
Small village on the edge of Reitio Forest and near Umisa Ocean.

Veirus
Medium town at the foot of the Demon's Maw mountains.

Ryoset
Large town in the Demon's Maw. Haven for Veinn and dragons.

Tsehi
Medium desert oasis town located in the Kinursi Desert.

Beirus
Small village on the Southern Plains.

Leis
Large, beautiful town located near Kyose Woods, Maris Lake, and Oakarza Mountains.

Kuro Outpost
Small outpost north of the Oakarzas.

Froswind
Medium town that has snowfall year round.

Revaldor
Large, grand city that is the Capital of Aedrys. In the middle of the city is the castle that houses King Veirallius and his son, Kazeryu.

ELEMENTS~

Fire
A very destructive element, possessing no healing or defensive abilities. Based on magical offense.
Subcategories of Fire are heat and explosion.
Opposite of Ice.
Ice
A defensive element, using barriers to deflect attacks and reflect magic. Based on magical defense.
Subcategories are snow, hail and cold.
Opposite of Fire.
Water
A balanced element, possessing healing, defensive and offensive maneuvers. Water is Multiuse.
Subcategories are mist, steam, and acid.
Opposite of Lightning.
Lightning
A very destructive element, having no healing and weak defensive abilities. Based on magical speed.
Subcategories are cloud and sound.
Opposite of Water.
Earth
A 'tank' element, having no healing abilities (unless using the 'Nature' subcategory), but strong defense, stamina, and strength. Based on physical defense.
Subcategories are nature and stone.
Opposite of Wind.
Wind
An elusive element, based on a 'hit and run' strategy, which is effective, as wind-based things are generally frail. Based on physical speed.
Subcategories are time and blades.
Opposite of Earth.
Light
The 'healer' element, having very weak offensive abilities, but strong healing, stamina, and defense. Also allows removal of negative effects, such as Slow, Poison, or Blind. Based on healing.
Subcategories are ray (an offensive version) and shield (an even more defensive version). Even damaging magics are classified as White Magic.
Opposite of Dark.
Dark
An offensive element, although it has weak physical traits and direct damage magic. It focuses on dealing damage through using enfeebling magic. Based on magical offense.
Subcategories are shade (a defensive version) and malice (+direct damage, -enfeebling.) Classified as Black Magic.
Opposite of Light.


MAINLY FOR THE SUMMONER CLASS, BUT YOU OTHERS SHOULD STILL READ IT.
Cyrun Gems are physical manifestations of elemental energy, formed the same way that monsters are, although gems take much more energy to form, making them a rare find. Gems have the ability to amplify magic of their element and capture monsters of their element, too. Each Cyrun Gem can hold up to 3 monsters. However, the only people who can call monsters out of the Gems are Summoners. Each different element of a Gem can only be found in a certain area, too.

MONSTERS~

Monsters are living, physical forms of the elements, created like Cyrun Gems, but they need much less energy to be created, making them much more common. Monsters are generally found in the same place that Cyrun Gems of their element are, but sometimes a Fire monster could be in a Light area. Monsters also can have two different elements, making them more versatile, but easier to find the right Cyrun Gem to catch them with.

Here's where monsters of certain elements are generally found.

Fire~Tsehi
Ice~Froswind
Water~Eeshi
Lightning~Leis (Oakarzas)
Earth~Reito (Reitio Forest)
Wind~Beirus
Dark~Demon's Maw Mountains
Light~Leis (Kyose Woods)

I will also make a bestiary soon, and any contributions will be appreciated.

http://www.megaupload.com/?d=K3090YGM Have to Megaupload it, due to not being able to attach it. It's a PowerPoint file, so don't download it unless you have PowerPoint!

OR *drumroll... A .hack// RP.

I also have another idea, but I can't find the stupid Word Document it's saved in.
 
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JBCBlank

Satanist to the core.
2,208
Posts
18
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^__^;;;



I would just accept Alter Ego's criticism, because it's really actually quite in depth, and would really make your plot in general better. And as for the spelling thing, I would just use a spell-checker if you suck in general. If you don't have Microsoft Word or Appleworks or something like that, try an online spell-checker. It makes it easier for everyone. ^^

I always use spell check, it says I do it fine... maybe my MW has something wrong with it.... *sigh* I'm just gonna stick to wrighting assays for my friends... Spanish is alot easier to spell in...

~JBCBlank
 

Loki

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Midnight Dragon:That sounds interesting so far Midnight, I'll read more of it tomorrow. The only thing is that everything combined makes it incredulously long. x_x But, that may be a good or bad thing. I haven't yet read it all. *sneaking online* I wish I could say more, but my keyboard's too loud. >.<

JBCBlank, try a different spell-checker. ^^; It's 'write', 'a lot' and 'essay'.

Yoshi: Yay! <3's for helper's! And I'll be happy to take a look at your plot tomorrow. This is your first time as an RP Master, isn't it?
 

Phanima

That servant of the evil one
1,567
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  • Age 34
  • Seen Oct 11, 2011
The first stage of the Chunin Exam has been troubling me lately. The concept seems simple but I'm not sure how to carry it out. I've kind of analysed two different decisions. The first would be to completely scrap the first stage and advance directly to the second stage, since that's where a lot of the action happens. Or, I was thinking of implementing the same "tenth question" Ibiki Morino gave in the anime.
There are two different scenes of Ibiki giving out the tenth question of the first test of the Chunin Exam in the anime. In both scenes Ibiki challenges the Genin to decide whether or not to actually attempt the question in order to see who is confident or stupid enough to take it. When Naruto's class took it, everyone who attempted the tenth question passed after been given the opportunity to leave and try again later without the risk of being a Genin forever. But in a flashback in later episodes where Ibiki conducts the same exam with his little brother, all those who attempted the tenth question failed because they failed to realise the importance of being able to understand the situation.

Because of this, I'm not really sure what to do for the first stage. Should I include it, or skip it and go straight to the second stage. Because my idea was if I was to write up the first stage test, I was going to make it that each person in the RP would have to post either "accept" or "decline" to taking the tenth question and I would then randomly select whether the people who said "accept" would pass or the people who said "decline" would pass. But then if I were to do that, then that would mean my character would have to be on the winning side and people may just choose the answer I do. But then again, people might not like being booted out so quickly (even though a warning is given) because they might think it's biased. Keep it? Skip it? Or something completely different?
 
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