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Avatar: The Last Airbender- Chaos Uprising [OOC+SU]

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SV

See You Space Cowboy
3,393
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13
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  • Seen Feb 7, 2022
I think a bit of the Air might be visible because of the mass of air buildup because of using Air Bending. However, that's just a guess. I'll go with it being remotely visible, like in the series.

http://alisachristopher.deviantart.com/art/Avatar-World-Map-95796945

By the way, this link leads to a map of the world, which can help some of you in understanding the general direction we are going, places we might visit, etc. Understand, though, that since this is a time period about 400 years or so before the events of the television series, some of these places do not exist, while others may have different names. I will also create new places on the map as well.

We'll be using Garith's Dragon as the main transportation for now, but to please the others with animal, we may use other later on in the RP. We're going to the Southern Water Tribe, as stated in my post, but we'll stopping along the way in certain places to get extra food, and information. I'll let you know where we'll stop once we head off.
 
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SylveonStar

Sylveon
1,940
Posts
12
Years
  • Age 28
  • Seen Mar 15, 2017
Exams for the next two days, I'll log on to see if anythings been posted but most likely won't be posting til exams are done and over with
 

かずき Kazuki

Feeling down and broken...~
73
Posts
12
Years
かずき Sign-Up

Sign-Up - Kazuki the Energybender


Name:
Spoiler:

Gender:
Spoiler:

Age:
Spoiler:

Nation:
Spoiler:

Powers/Skills:
Spoiler:

Appearance:
Spoiler:

Personality:
Spoiler:

History:
Spoiler:

RP Sample: Kazuki peered through the leaves and branches of his well-hidden spot in the tree. They're gone... Finally... he thought to himself, and he then leaped silently out of the tree and landed on the ground. He rummaged around and found some edible food left over from their picnic. He warily took the food and fled to the forest, making sure he was unseen. How much did I get from this one... Kazuki sorted through his prizes. A few sandwiches, some fried kebobs... Oh... Fire Nation Gummies! Kazuki withheld his excitement, putting away his foods, along with his favorite treats, into his pack, and he then ventured into the forest, in search of something new to give his life purpose.
 
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MichaelaTheUchiha

Forever Shawol and Aileean
2,082
Posts
14
Years
...o.O

Are you hinting that Kazuki is an ANGEL, or something?

This is purely my own opinion and this shouldn't affect your ability to be accepted or not:

Having a "shadow" bender...Well, that sort of seems that your character is a Mary-Sure/Gary-Stu. I mean, yeah, it is original, but I should think that Supervegeta and -Nocturnal would like to keep it within the same...world with the same nations, y'know? Also, you've seem to have forgotten a gender...I mean, we do see the "he", but if people are kind of curious, they aren't going to go through the thing to find either a "he" or a "she", even if it is easy to find.

Wait, did I even put a gender? Now I'M worried.

Anyways...

However, having both the picture AND the text good. You've managed to cover both of your bases well. And the fact that he has a temper is good, you didn't have him a completely perfect personality.

Well, that's really all I have to say. xD If you don't care for my opinion, ignore it then.
 

かずき Kazuki

Feeling down and broken...~
73
Posts
12
Years
Are you hinting that Kazuki is an ANGEL, or something?
I suppose you could say that, yes... I was trying to keep a little bit of mystery within the sign-up...

Having a "shadow" bender...Well, that sort of seems that your character is a Mary-Sue/Gary-Stu. I mean, yeah, it is original, but I should think that Supervegeta and -Nocturnal would like to keep it within the same...world with the same nations, y'know?
Well, I suppose it is a little odd. I like to be different from everyone else, and i love being creative and original. It is a little odd for Avatar, but if I remember correctly, the was a Bloodbender, and Sandbenders. Different bending abilities can be found throughout the Nations, however rare they are. I would like to hear whether the GMs are okay with it or not.

Also, you've seem to have forgotten a gender...I mean, we do see the "he", but if people are kind of curious, they aren't going to go through the thing to find either a "he" or a "she", even if it is easy to find.

Wait, did I even put a gender? Now I'M worried.
Actually, you might not have. I copy/pasted the sign-up sheet, and there is no "Gender" section. But yes, I hope it was apparant enough that Kazuki is a male.

However, having both the picture AND the text good. You've managed to cover both of your bases well. And the fact that he has a temper is good, you didn't have him a completely perfect personality.
Thank you. The picture was a photoshop I had created the night before, and I liked it, so I used it. And of course, I always include text, because sometimes pictures can have imperfections. Plus, it felt safer to use both... And thank you, I like to have at least somewhat realistic character, personality-wise at least. One other "Negative" that I forgot to include was Kazuki's low self-esteem. He will take insults to heart, and his feelings are somewhat easily hurt...

Well, that's really all I have to say. xD If you don't care for my opinion, ignore it then.
I care about everyone's opinions, good or bad. So thank you for constructive criticism and praise, it helps me fix my mistakes. :)
 

SV

See You Space Cowboy
3,393
Posts
13
Years
  • Seen Feb 7, 2022
@Kazuki First of all, thank you for you interest in the RP! But what Michaela said is partially true. It is convenient that you broke up each of your parts in sections so that I may validate my concerns more clearly. Here it is.

First of all, I would like to point out that you are very creative, and your character is quite unique, probably one of the most unique characters I've seen yet, however, I would prefer if you would keep it within the Avatar world a little bit more. Which brings me to my first concern, which is your wings. Although I like the idea, I would prefer if you kept it a little bit into the world of Avatar, so please, if you will, change that.

This brings me to my next concern, which is your Powers and Skills. While I do encourage creativity, there is no correlation between shadow bending and any of the other elements, none that I can see. You stated before that the Avatar world expanded it's elements from the four nations, like sand and blood benders, but those expanded elements still had some relation between the four main elements: sand is close to earth, and blood is in relation with Water. Some things I might be more willing to accept is stuff like: Wood Benders (Water), Steam Benders (Fire). That is something that might actually have room for acceptance. Unfortunately, not Shadowbending. The idea is nice, but I don't think it has any place in this RP.

Also, I do think (this is a suggestion) that you should cut down on the amount of weapons you are proficient in. Being a powerful bender, but also being proficient in a number of weapons kinda cuts down on your skills as a whole, because your focus is too spread out. Remember, as a whole, I try to make everyone around the same level in the RPs, and having too many spread out techniques might be a problem.

I am, however, willing to allow you to have a bit of mystery in your RP, if you agree not to make anything other-worldly about it, this you can discuss with me later by PM. Everything else looks exceptionally well done. If you agree to change all of this, you may join the RP, for now, you are pending.
 

かずき Kazuki

Feeling down and broken...~
73
Posts
12
Years
I would prefer if you would keep it within the Avatar world a little bit more. Which brings me to my first concern, which is your wings. Although I like the idea, I would prefer if you kept it a little bit into the world of Avatar, so please, if you will, change that.
I'll remove the wings, however much that stirs me.. .>.<

This brings me to my next concern, which is your Powers and Skills. While I do encourage creativity, there is no correlation between shadow bending and any of the other elements, none that I can see. You stated before that the Avatar world expanded it's elements from the four nations, like sand and blood benders, but those expanded elements still had some relation between the four main elements: sand is close to earth, and blood is in relation with Water. Some things I might be more willing to accept is stuff like: Wood Benders (Water), Steam Benders (Fire). That is something that might actually have room for acceptance. Unfortunately, not Shadowbending. The idea is nice, but I don't think it has any place in this RP.
I have the perfect one... And it is within the Avatar World, and is only used once. I want to variate on it. This will make my character have power, but at dire consequence.

Also, I do think (this is a suggestion) that you should cut down on the amount of weapons you are proficient in. Being a powerful bender, but also being proficient in a number of weapons kinda cuts down on your skills as a whole, because your focus is too spread out. Remember, as a whole, I try to make everyone around the same level in the RPs, and having too many spread out techniques might be a problem.
Understood. I was mainly saying he only dual-blades, has used a few others a few times, and used other weapons maybe once. Technically the dual-blades were the only skill he really had, the others he just knew how to use. But I can fix it anyways...

Done. Check it out below:


~





Sign-Up - Kazuki the Energybender


Name:
Spoiler:

Gender:
Spoiler:

Age:
Spoiler:

Nation:
Spoiler:

Powers/Skills:
Spoiler:

Appearance:
Spoiler:

Personality:
Spoiler:

History:
Spoiler:

RP Sample: Kazuki peered through the leaves and branches of his well-hidden spot in the tree. They're gone... Finally... he thought to himself, and he then leaped silently out of the tree and landed on the ground. He rummaged around and found some edible food left over from their picnic. He warily took the food and fled to the forest, making sure he was unseen. How much did I get from this one... Kazuki sorted through his prizes. A few sandwiches, some fried kebobs... Oh... Fire Nation Gummies! Kazuki withheld his excitement, putting away his foods, along with his favorite treats, into his pack, and he then ventured into the forest, in search of something new to give his life purpose.





~



@Cain:
Yup, energybending. This was in Avatar, and I took my own spin on it. Let me know what you think. I think it seems pretty Avatar-esque, but since you're the GameMaster it's up to you. I edited every section except the RP Sample.
energy.png
 

SV

See You Space Cowboy
3,393
Posts
13
Years
  • Seen Feb 7, 2022
@Kazuki That is technically in the series, and it is also written as a separate bending style, so I am willing to accept that. However, I do have one suggestion. As many others in the RP have done, they have given themselves other weapon proficiencies besides just their bending (staffs, blades, etc.). This is, again, only a suggestion, but I advise you to, if you truly want this ability to be as powerful as you expect, to get rid of any other weapon proficiency entirely. For example, my character has no bending powers whatsoever, and is skilled with a blade. Therefore, if challenged by any of the other RPers to a duel of the blade/sword, he will most likely win, because he is focused primarily on that, while others have bending as well (Of course, if they add their bending to the fight, that's another idea completely). This is only a suggestion, but if you wish to remain with your weapons as well, I will have to greatly restrict and lower the power of your bending, as I will generally with all other people who have weapons along with their bending, just to be fair. Please let me know what you decide to do, but for now, you will remain pending until you reply.

Although I would like to know a bit more, perhaps by PM, on what exactly is your story. You leave a lot of things blank and mysterious, and I generally don't mind, but I don't want any..."other-worldly" surprises, if you know what I mean (that includes spirit world).

Wait a second...how do you know my name?!? o.O
 

かずき Kazuki

Feeling down and broken...~
73
Posts
12
Years
I do have one suggestion. As many others in the RP have done, they have given themselves other weapon proficiencies besides just their bending (staffs, blades, etc.). This is, again, only a suggestion, but I advise you to, if you truly want this ability to be as powerful as you expect, to get rid of any other weapon proficiency entirely. For example, my character has no bending powers whatsoever, and is skilled with a blade. Therefore, if challenged by any of the other RPers to a duel of the blade/sword, he will most likely win, because he is focused primarily on that, while others have bending as well (Of course, if they add their bending to the fight, that's another idea completely). This is only a suggestion, but if you wish to remain with your weapons as well, I will have to greatly restrict and lower the power of your bending, as I will generally with all other people who have weapons along with their bending, just to be fair. Please let me know what you decide to do, but for now, you will remain pending until you reply.
Well... I guess. You can remove the dualblades and weponry. But as a fighting style, he uses vital jabs (as it goes well with the energybending style).

Although I would like to know a bit more, perhaps by PM, on what exactly is your story. You leave a lot of things blank and mysterious, and I generally don't mind, but I don't want any..."other-worldly" surprises, if you know what I mean (that includes spirit world).
No, no, there's nothing spirit-worldish or supernatural, unless you count that he can silently communicate with most animals (through gestures and movements). I think being the energybender makes me special enough :p

Wait a second...how do you know my name?!? o.O
Hehehe... I know you on Facebook :P (lol, even Genevieve laughed at that)


One final note. If I am now accepted, I'd like a summarized recap of where the players are now in the story, so that I may insert myself properly.
 

-Nocturnal

Vengeance.
476
Posts
12
Years
@Vegeta

VEGETA WTF Didn't you count, man? JEEZ! if memory serves me right I believe that the spots are full, hence Kazuki can't enter...but of course you can add more spots if you want to. Lol and I thought you're experienced. Count before accepting people :P
 

SV

See You Space Cowboy
3,393
Posts
13
Years
  • Seen Feb 7, 2022
@Lu Oh....sh!t. I didn't see that...damn.

@Kazuki Sorry, man. I didn't realize we were filled up. I prefer to keep a lower amount of RPers in the RP so I don't lose track of the group. If someone drops, I'll let you know, but unfortunately, I can't accept you for now.
 

かずき Kazuki

Feeling down and broken...~
73
Posts
12
Years
-.-' ... Well, when I thought my day couldn't get any worse... Serious letdown... I mean, is one spot too much? I can be a pretty frequent poster, at most missing one day off of PC. But usually I always have my laptop with me. That's why being a nerd has benefits...
 

MichaelaTheUchiha

Forever Shawol and Aileean
2,082
Posts
14
Years
-.-' ... Well, when I thought my day couldn't get any worse... Serious letdown... I mean, is one spot too much? I can be a pretty frequent poster, at most missing one day off of PC. But usually I always have my laptop with me. That's why being a nerd has benefits...

This is something that would probably be better to be as either a VM or a PM.
 

SV

See You Space Cowboy
3,393
Posts
13
Years
  • Seen Feb 7, 2022
Be sure to get to posting, everyone. Looking for a few more posts before I can take to the skies. BTW, If HunterZero doesn't post for a while, I'll bunny him a little to get everyone on his dragon, so we can finally set off. :) Or I might consider going on the Bison for now...up to you guys I guess.
 

かずき Kazuki

Feeling down and broken...~
73
Posts
12
Years
NOTICE:

Just a reminder, that I will still wait for this RP to have openings. I have only been accepted into 1 RP, signed-up for 2, and signed and waiting for this one. If the spot is open, notify me via PM or VM. Arigato!

ありがと!

~かずき
 

SV

See You Space Cowboy
3,393
Posts
13
Years
  • Seen Feb 7, 2022
Will be posting soon, just a heads up for everyone. I decided to skip time a little bit for everyone to get things moving. We'll be arriving in our first town then.

BTW chef30 has: 1 day left to post. Or she is removed from the RP.
 
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