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Pokemon New Dawn

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Rise

「Rise Director」
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To be honest, it'd make a lot more sense to explain this as a Pokemon created disaster than simply a natural one brought on by the "Gods"

Not the beam itself, that can be branched off in many ways for a more interesting plot. But considering how the game involves Pokemon, a disaster created by one makes not only more sense, but leaves room for more improvement and less people to question the sense of the idea.

An example would be saying the god, or whatever you decide causes this, sends down "Emmisaries" to ensure its wrath is proved. The two control Fire and Ice, one making half a barren desert, the other freezing the land over.

To say the gods are angry over a fight as well is unrealistic. The title of a god, or deity of immense power is to deal with the world by NOT influencing it. To solve one problem with godly power brings people who rely on that power too heavily, thus gods do not show themselves or intefere with peoples lives. You could say that the two sides want to overthrow the gods however, similar to how humans tried to take over Olympus. The resulting anger caused from both sides caused the gods to seperate the islands and after time the two sides where formed, rangers and trainers.
 

Pichuichu

Creator Of (Insert Here)
271
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Oh never changed the back story did i and The God's they are pokemon but never seen before.
@acedragonite SORRY didn't notice...
 
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Rise

「Rise Director」
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Well once you've updated it, I'll give it a once over and tell you how it looks.
 

Rise

「Rise Director」
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Okay, gave it a once over.

First, it's a good idea so far, and it holds a lot more ground than what you had before. However what you need to do is check up on a few parts. It still has inconsistencies. You say they came to a land, which most would assume is this Fingoe you talk about. But then suddenly talk about two islands being hit. If this is also Fingoe you have to explain how it became two islands in the first place.

It's better to say two entwined beams hit one land, and thus they separate into the two islands.

Second, what people gave them their names if there where only 8 people who settled there? You have to create a time span between the original story and the people of now. So it's better to say "Over time the ancestors of those few called the deity's...etc etc"

There are a number of grammatical errors here and there as well, so it'd be best to fix what you can. Getting a game off to the public is all about presentation. If your posts show spelling errors, or inconsistency, it's safe the assume your game will as well. Or at least, that's how most people think.

If you'd like I can fix whatever problems there are and show you a draft so you can work on it from there. Just let me know. It's a good idea overall, it just needs to go a few extra steps before it can be more than just "good".
 

Planetes.

@n_diiv
1,163
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13
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  • Age 27
  • Seen Jun 6, 2017
Hey everyone New Dawn, here's some New Dawn Pokemon!

Valkyria_Defender_of_the_Skies_by_Pokemon_Tabi.jpg

Valkyria by me

Cherubud_by_rYANrULZ01.png

Cheribud by Llennoccm8

Hope you like them as they will be appearing in new dawn.
(Lol ik my art needs work so don't bother)

Also, visit us at the Pokemon New Dawn Forums!
Link: ~Link Removed~
 
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Poeman

Banned
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15
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  • Age 29
  • Seen Nov 1, 2012
Why did you even watermark those? O_o
It looks like it was done in photoshop with no previous knowledge.

I like the design of the second one tho
 

Planetes.

@n_diiv
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haha yup exactly I'm still learning XD. But its not the concept art that's going to be in the game, is it?
 
51
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Dude, your map looks so bad... and not thought out, unless hes gonna get surf at the beginning of the game, which is not the best idea.
 

Pichuichu

Creator Of (Insert Here)
271
Posts
13
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Actually you get surf after the third gym. at the beginning, the player takes a boat (or a bo-at as some may say) to the first and second island.

Also here is some Fakemon sprites please give feedback.
Spoiler:
 

Planetes.

@n_diiv
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@Poeman thanks for the tip.
@Pichuichu I like the Cheribud sprite, the other, not so much. Also just clarifying the first town is ot the one near the maple trees?
pichuichu.png


003-1.jpg

Anyway this is a rapidash evo I am working on, any ideas on how to improve it?
 
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ConCept

Foreigner Productions
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13
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  • Seen Jul 29, 2011
They look too... flat, faction bended, strongly outlined, dimensionally distorted (ref. to appliable XYZ dimensions). If you allow me to give you a tip which has worked me fine, draw, and draw, and draw, and draw once more. Repeat the same character until you've completely mastered it's design, then try the spriting, of course, watching for dimension. They're supposed to live in a pseudo-3D world, have depth rather than look like a plain shape. Also, try to smoothen the outline colors by using deeper tones to outline light-illuminated sections.

picture.php

You may have this. I tried to give a new look to your Cheribud, this is what I've got. You may keep it if you want to. If you want any other thing done, VM or PM me and we'll talk about it.
 

Pichuichu

Creator Of (Insert Here)
271
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13
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Its the one in the maple trees. you could im prove the sugi by adding more flames around the body and mabye longer legs? also the other one catere was the first sprite.
 

Planetes.

@n_diiv
1,163
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Rappaloosa, Male Ponyta alt.
Rappaloosa_by_Pokemon_Tabi.jpg


and concept thank you for the sprite!


Other Version: Shaded a bit too much there
DARGON.jpg
 
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51
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13
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Ok, no, that looks terrible. Heres an idea. Pegasus plus Rapidash. (with fire wings maybe)I have no idea what that was.
 

Poeman

Banned
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15
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  • Seen Nov 1, 2012
Those aren't sprites it's crap that was made in MSPaint, notice how everyone else's fakemon has shading and lighting, a specific type of outline? Try and replicate it, and make sure you do GEN 4 style to match your game.
 
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