• Our software update is now concluded. You will need to reset your password to log in. In order to do this, you will have to click "Log in" in the top right corner and then "Forgot your password?".
  • Forum moderator applications are now open! Click here for details.
  • Welcome to PokéCommunity! Register now and join one of the best fan communities on the 'net to talk Pokémon and more! We are not affiliated with The Pokémon Company or Nintendo.

The most ridiculous thing you've ever heard from a customer

3
Posts
18
Years
  • Seen Mar 16, 2006
I have a number of stories to share, and I hope that others will be inclined to add more stories from their own lines of work.

First let me give you a little background:

I work in a college registrars office for a school called Eisenhower University - see eisenhoweruniversity . com. My division deals with prior learning assessment (PLA) and evaluation for people with work experience and/or previous college credits that they could turn into an Eisenhower degree. Every day our office gets calls and emails from all around the country, and I have the pleasure of speaking to a number of upstanding individuals who think they could get a Master's Degree in Engineering because they once "built a do-it-yourself radio kit." While we mail out degrees in many trades for work experience, we're not going to give you an Accounting Degree because your aunt was an accountant five years ago and you once "balanced your own checkbook." If you expect a university to grant you a degree based on work experience you should have actually, you know, worked in the field for a number of years.

What makes things worse is that the hippies at my university recently artifically lowered the PLA fees to ridiculous levels due to of some kind of "education should be free or almost free" mentality. That means my office gets bombarded with inquiries 24/7 from idiots with no any qualifications or work references at all, who want to trick us into giving them a degree.

- Story 1 -

Earlier today I had a call from a redneck wanting to apply with us. During the conversation this is what transpired:

Me: May I have your zip code please?

Him: Zip code? You mean 804?

Me: Oh, I'm sorry I meant your 5 digit zip code

Him: Hold on, HONEY!! WHATS THE ZIP CODE!!

Me: *pause*

Him: We don't know, I just want to sign up for the PLA program

Me: Absolutely. I will be happy to help you further; what state do you live in?

Him: STATE? the UNITED STATES!

- Story 2 -

Often we'll get clueless people who are so out of touch with technology that its laughable. Here's a snippet from a conversation with a 40 year old guy about applying for our work experience degree program online.

Me: What version of Windows are you running?

Them: Hold on, let me check.

Me: OK.

Them: They're thermal.

Me: I...I beg your pardon?

Them: The windows are thermal.

Me: ...

- Story 3 -

Last week a lady called in who was having trouble accessing her student account on our website. I don't know why she called our office, since tech support is a different division entirely. But after a little trial and error we were able to get her account fixed and everything squared away. The tail end of our conversation went like this:

Me: Well, seems like everything is working, is there anything else I can help you with?

Her: Yeah, don't use anti-perspirant! Wanna know why?

Me: Not really, but I bet you're going to tell me.

Her: Because it causes cancer! Look at the first ingredient, it's aluminum! It gives you the cancer!

Me: Well, that's good to know ma'am, have a good day!

Her: Wait!! Do you know why 9/11 really happened? George Bush ordered it! There were secret Nesara computers in the sub-sections underneath the WTC!

Me: Wow, amazing.

Her: I'm part of this secret agency tied to Nesara, and we're planning on overthrowing the government! Here's a few links you should check out, and tell all your friends about!

Me: Will do ma'am, thank you for calling.

Her: No no! Wait! Nesara Nesara Nesara Nesara Nesara Nesara Nesara Nesara Nesara Nesara Nesara Nesara Nesara Nesara Nesara Nesara Nesara Nesara Nesara Nesara Nesara Nesara Nesara Nesara Nesara Nesara Nesara Nesara Nesara Nesara Nesara Nesara Nesara Nesara Nesara !!!!!!

The call lasted about 40 minutes after I fixed her problem, and since I can't hang up on students I had to sit there and listen to these awesome stories. She went on and on about Nesara, and how I should watch the news because something huge was going to happen in the next few days. Of course nothing did. God I love my job.
 
3
Posts
18
Years
  • Seen Mar 16, 2006
I have more stories if you guys are interested. I'll probably be back later tonight since I have some important things to do at the moment.
 

Psycho

♥~Catalina~♥
289
Posts
18
Years
Do refrain from double-posting as it is illegal on PC >_>

However, to contribute to the topic, I must say that the most ridiculous thing I can recall of hearing from a customer is:
Cashier: Paper or plastic?
Customer: Cardboard.

I find that to be ever so humorous.

Psycho
 
Last edited:

Dawg 2005

The original Dawg 2005
6,094
Posts
19
Years
Haha, I like this thread.

Cashier:That will be $50.
Customer:Oh sorry, I only have $45.
Cashier:Well put this back.
Customer:Will that bring the price down?

I was in awe. XD
 

Chase Leader

Music Is My Miracle Drug!
851
Posts
19
Years
Well nothing amsuses me anymore...for instance now everything is annoying and the customer should know better.

Cashier: Your total comes to $5.
Customer: Well the price over there says $3.
Cashier: Price Check to Register One.
Customer: I'm kinda in a hurry...
Cashier 2: Well the price does say $5...and the sign above it (or near it, for a different item) says $3.
Customer: Well I guess I didn't see that...
Cashier: (Argggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhh) alright is that all for you then":classic:" alright you have a good day...

I mean come on can't they read...
 
30,928
Posts
20
Years
  • Seen Apr 2, 2023
FSwenson said:
I have more stories if you guys are interested. I'll probably be back later tonight since I have some important things to do at the moment.
Please do...I haven't laughed that much in quite a while.
 

Kim

170
Posts
18
Years
When I worked in Victoria's Secret, some woman repeatedly told me not to show her any thongs, as she doesn't like objects being protruded into her. I don't know what her deal was.

And when I was doing a return for someone, some guy came up with a crumpled bag and wanted to exchange his purchases for store credit. I just nonchalantly said "oh, did your girlfriend not like the undies?" "No, they were too small for my sister." .................wtf. Who buys g-strings for their sisters?
 
3
Posts
18
Years
  • Seen Mar 16, 2006
Here's another antecdote:

As a teenager I worked in a Domino's pizza. One day some guy came into my work and asked if he could buy cupcakes and have us bake them on his pizza.

He was very fat and very serious.

And one more:

A few years ago I was working in the tech shop of a CompUSA. I had a customer give me grief for shaking a CD-R. He eyed me angrily and snapped, "Don't do that! You'll make all the data fall off!"
 

Drifblim

Banned
1,773
Posts
18
Years
If I may include my experiences as cashier, I had a customer tell another about me, 'That's the [expletive] that has issues with us using up his bags!' Which of course, got gawks from the other people in the store. And they shut right up after that and paid me no further attention.
 

Dawg 2005

The original Dawg 2005
6,094
Posts
19
Years
Kim said:
When I worked in Victoria's Secret, some woman repeatedly told me not to show her any thongs, as she doesn't like objects being protruded into her. I don't know what her deal was.

And when I was doing a return for someone, some guy came up with a crumpled bag and wanted to exchange his purchases for store credit. I just nonchalantly said "oh, did your girlfriend not like the undies?" "No, they were too small for my sister." .................wtf. Who buys g-strings for their sisters?
I really hope the second one was sarcasm, xD.

A few years ago I was working in the tech shop of a CompUSA. I had a customer give me grief for shaking a CD-R. He eyed me angrily and snapped, "Don't do that! You'll make all the data fall off!"
XDDD! I will definitly check this thread alot.
 

Kim

170
Posts
18
Years
Dawg 2005 said:
I really hope the second one was sarcasm, xD.
Ehh...I can usually tell when people were joking. Of course teenage white boys dressed as "gangstaz" were there as a joke and would say all sorts of things. But this guy was in his 40's/50's...I think he was serious. Just a bit disturbed. I kind of left it at that, and just returned his stuff.

What's more disturbing is, I don't know what we did with the used stuff that we exchanged/allowed to be returned. I only went in the back room when we had to get mannequinns and such, so ehh...those used underwears could be anywhere. I feel bad if people bought them...used.
 

Chikara

ʕ´•ᴥ•`ʔ
8,284
Posts
19
Years
I actualy had the comment that got me fired...^^' Im14, and this woman got me so frickin fired up...

Her: how old are you? You seem too young to work here

Me: Im 14

Her: Really? Oh, the youngins...Always so short these days

Me: *pause* *getting mad*

Her: Oh well...How tall are you? You look around oh...4 feet?

Me: How old are you? You look about 83 years



I was fired lol
 
4,419
Posts
19
Years
My dad had some wierd experiences in a shop he used to work in

Some guy: I'd like a daily mail (or something) please
Dad: sorry but we're out of stock
S G: I said I'd like a daily mail
Dad: I'm sorry Sir but I the daily mail is sold out
S G: Kids these days, never understand a word adult's say

That was like when my dad was 16 and he's 50 something now O.o
 

Kim

170
Posts
18
Years
FireFox113 said:
Thanks, its good to know I have 1 person on my side...-.- lol

hahaha. wtf. You think tha'ts the LEAST of what you'll get on the job?

To handle a job, you should have a level of maturity. Granted, some can only take so much. But that is NOTHING compared to what you'll get someday at some other job. You should not have made that comment. You should have just done your job and left it at that.
 

Zelos

*yawn*
1,377
Posts
18
Years
Kim said:
hahaha. wtf. You think tha'ts the LEAST of what you'll get on the job?

To handle a job, you should have a level of maturity. Granted, some can only take so much. But that is NOTHING compared to what you'll get someday at some other job. You should not have made that comment. You should have just done your job and left it at that.

Well, some people just can't take insults. << They find it very rude and don't like to help people that do it. I for one wouldn't have been able to handle it, that woman would have so deserved it.
 
Back
Top