The Rainbow Connection [LGBTS Club]

Alice · Feb 17, 2012

Well, I told my dad. It was probably selfish of me, but I was still stressing over it after like 5 days. I had to get it out.

He said he thought that the lifestyle wasn't safe, and I'm probably going to have it rough, etc... and had a very worried look on his face. It sort of made me feel like I was being scolded. He also asked how I knew and stuff like that which I was kind of surprised about, considering he said he had a lot of friends that were gay when he was in school, which would've been the 60s/70s... and he lived in an even smaller/more redneck town than I do now.

At the end of the conversation, he said that it doesn't change his opinion of me in any way, and he definitely understands that it's not a choice and all that. He didn't take it quite as well as I thought though, but it's definitely better than a lot of people. (I was more or less expecting an "Oh, okay. That's fine." or something like that. lol)

If he still seems worried about it later, I'm gonna tell him that I'm happy, and that I don't want him to be sad for me. If I get a good chance anyway. Actually telling him in the first place was super awkward, and I'm normally really smooth under pressure.

Keiran · Feb 17, 2012

QuilavaKing said:
Well, I told my dad. It was probably selfish of me, but I was still stressing over it after like 5 days. I had to get it out.

It's not selfish of you at all! And I'm glad to hear he took it not-quite-well-but-not-badly (I think)! lol

QuilavaKing said:
If he still seems worried about it later, I'm gonna tell him that I'm happy

And that's all that matters.

-Jared- · Feb 17, 2012

QuilavaKing said:
Well, I told my dad. It was probably selfish of me, but I was still stressing over it after like 5 days. I had to get it out.

He said he thought that the lifestyle wasn't safe, and I'm probably going to have it rough, etc... and had a very worried look on his face. It sort of made me feel like I was being scolded. He also asked how I knew and stuff like that which I was kind of surprised about, considering he said he had a lot of friends that were gay when he was in school, which would've been the 60s/70s... and he lived in an even smaller/more redneck town than I do now.

At the end of the conversation, he said that it doesn't change his opinion of me in any way, and he definitely understands that it's not a choice and all that. He didn't take it quite as well as I thought though, but it's definitely better than a lot of people. (I was more or less expecting an "Oh, okay. That's fine." or something like that. lol)

If he still seems worried about it later, I'm gonna tell him that I'm happy, and that I don't want him to be sad for me. If I get a good chance anyway. Actually telling him in the first place was super awkward, and I'm normally really smooth under pressure.

It isn't selfish at all! In fact, I'd say you probably were worried about the things your parents were worried about ON TOP of coming out, so yeah, I don't think it's selfish. :>

ANYWAYS Congrats! You feel a huge load of your shoulders, right? And I think the "scolding" feeling might be him trying to make sure you stay safe. Maybe. I don't know your dad, so I am kinda basing it off how I would assume my dad would be. xD

So yeah! I'm happy for you! :D

Patatas Fritas · Feb 17, 2012

TwiDragon said:
I've been working with my voice for the past few days, and I have made some progress. What do you guys think
http://vocaroo.com/i/s0TbookM6uTS
I'm a bit nervous about it, but I shouldn't be >.<

Any feedback is good c:

On other news, I opened up to all my friends on facebook, and they all love me the same. I'm really happy about it all! c:

EDIT - I wanted to make a few things clear on the voice: It kind of goes a bit everywhere towards the end, I'm aware of it. Holding this voice for a lentgh is the big problem. The longest time I was able to hold this voice was 5 minutes and 12 seconds. Which was before recording. ^.^;;

Are you going for more feminine? If so I think you're doing really well - The pitch needs some work but that's understandable! I can hear that with a little more work you're going to have a really good voice, I'd love to hear more as time goes one!

QuilavaKing said:
Well, I told my dad. It was probably selfish of me, but I was still stressing over it after like 5 days. I had to get it out.

He said he thought that the lifestyle wasn't safe, and I'm probably going to have it rough, etc... and had a very worried look on his face. It sort of made me feel like I was being scolded. He also asked how I knew and stuff like that which I was kind of surprised about, considering he said he had a lot of friends that were gay when he was in school, which would've been the 60s/70s... and he lived in an even smaller/more redneck town than I do now.

At the end of the conversation, he said that it doesn't change his opinion of me in any way, and he definitely understands that it's not a choice and all that. He didn't take it quite as well as I thought though, but it's definitely better than a lot of people. (I was more or less expecting an "Oh, okay. That's fine." or something like that. lol)

I'm really happy for you, he sounds to me like he's pretty accepting - Worrying is understandable due to the somewhat closed minded opinions of many people. I hope everything goes well for you and your dad stops worrying.

TwiDragon · Feb 18, 2012

^Yeah, this has only been a few days of practice. It shouldn't take too long, as I've had to learn how to speak with accents and do voice work in only a week on several voices for my Theater 1 Class. I'm thinking that if I want to find someone who can help me with vocal practice 1on1 at a professional level, I will need to know about it from him. However, he is like 65, and I have a harder time telling people who are older.

Well, I made progress. I told some teachers and my counsler what was going on. I'm glad that they are supportive of me. I told them because I was reccomended to, especially if I were to get my self involved in some sort of discrimination with another student. Which I can see happening with three people at my school; but for now, I'm just ignoring them.

Also, I'm probably going to be doing another voice check at the end of the month. Alergys will come and ruin my voice again, but I'll have a time where my throat is clear and not effected by winter or pollen.

TornZero · Feb 18, 2012

TwiDragon said:
^Yeah, this has only been a few days of practice. It shouldn't take too long, as I've had to learn how to speak with accents and do voice work in only a week on several voices for my Theater 1 Class. I'm thinking that if I want to find someone who can help me with vocal practice 1on1 at a professional level, I will need to know about it from him. However, he is like 65, and I have a harder time telling people who are older.

Well, I made progress. I told some teachers and my counsler what was going on. I'm glad that they are supportive of me. I told them because I was reccomended to, especially if I were to get my self involved in some sort of discrimination with another student. Which I can see happening with three people at my school; but for now, I'm just ignoring them.

Also, I'm probably going to be doing another voice check at the end of the month. Alergys will come and ruin my voice again, but I'll have a time where my throat is clear and not effected by winter or pollen.

If you need someone to help with vocal control (and staying like that), I found that a choir teacher is typically great for this. You may be able to get something arranged if you have a school choir where the teacher stays after school or is there around lunchtime.

And I hope your throat clears up for a good while. It would be awesome to hear your progress without any recurring allergy issues.

TwiDragon · Feb 18, 2012

^Yeah, it should be back at a normal level by Monday (I hope)

I have a few friends who are going to help me with it. Its harder for me to practice using my phone voice, as it sounds so much deeper than I normally sound. I'm actually planning on going to one friends house and doing some vocal training with her. I'm a bit nervous, but I shouldn't be >.<

Shining Raichu · Feb 18, 2012

Aaaaaaaaa QK I know we were talking about it on Skype earlier but this is so amazing congratulations! I honestly don't see how being honest with somebody about yourself could be seen as selfish though :(

Ctrl.Alt.Geak · Feb 18, 2012

QuilavaKing said:
Well, I told my dad. It was probably selfish of me, but I was still stressing over it after like 5 days. I had to get it out.

I'm really happy for you, it must feel at least slightly good to get it out in the open.
I really dont think you were being selfish at all. Its better than letting it build up which could end up causing stress.

Kano Shuuya · Feb 18, 2012

QuilavaKing said:
Well, I told my dad. It was probably selfish of me, but I was still stressing over it after like 5 days. I had to get it out.

He said he thought that the lifestyle wasn't safe, and I'm probably going to have it rough, etc... and had a very worried look on his face. It sort of made me feel like I was being scolded.....

That whole thing sounds like how it went with my mom and me. xD; She wasn't exactly against it, besides the fact that she wants grandchildren, and proooobably won't get any, unless they're adopted. But in general, plenty of parents are worried for their kids, but that also means that he isn't against it, so I'd say it went okay. owo

Also, I don't think it was selfish of you, when it comes to something like that you shouldn't be concerned with making other feel uncomfortable with it when it just makes you miserable. -w- Congrats on telling him~.

Alice · Feb 18, 2012

Well, the reason I say it's selfish is because he has way more stress than I do, and I just passed most of my stress on to him... and now I don't have to worry about much of anything anymore. =/

Shining Raichu · Feb 18, 2012

I wouldn't necessarily see it like that - you passing him your stress. You've always been this way; the only difference is that now he knows. Now while he may worry about you because of this, it's a lot better than worrying about you because you're sitting there miserable and him having no idea why. Honestly, parents worry - it's their job. They'll always find something to worry about. All that's changed is that now he knows why he's worrying about you :P

Alice · Feb 18, 2012

Well, at least I'm more or less out of the closet now, lol. It's definitely not safe to come out completely here, but my parents are really the only people I talk to on a daily basis anyway, so I might as well be.

Anyway, how about a question? After coming out, did you/would you date any of your old friends? I don't know if any of them were gay or not, since I moved away and don't talk to any of them anymore, but when I think back, the idea of going out with one of them, even the cute ones, is really weird, and kinda disgusting.

http://www.nytimes.com/2012/02/18/us/maryland-house-approves-gay-marriage-measure.html?_r=1
Wewt. I hope this keeps up.

Keiran · Feb 18, 2012

QuilavaKing said:
Anyway, how about a question? After coming out, did you/would you date any of your old friends? I don't know if any of them were gay or not, since I moved away and don't talk to any of them anymore, but when I think back, the idea of going out with one of them, even the cute ones, is really weird, and kinda disgusting.

Not really an old friend, but definitely my best friend since birth (our mothers were best friends). He'd be perfect. His mother & I, and a lot of other people for that matter, think he is gay but closeted. I don't really know for sure, but one can hope right? I haven't the heart to ask him, he gets really upset when people ask/assume he's gay. Seems like everyone I fall for is either straight or far away. T_T

Alice · Feb 18, 2012

Keiran777 said:
Not really an old friend, but definitely my best friend since birth (our mothers were best friends). He'd be perfect. His mother & I, and a lot of other people for that matter, think he is gay but closeted. I don't really know for sure, but one can hope right? I haven't the heart to ask him, he gets really upset when people ask/assume he's gay. Seems like everyone I fall for is either straight or far away. T_T

Well, by "old" friend, I didn't mean literally old, but that you knew them for a long time. So, your friend would be a very old friend. lol

Kano Shuuya · Feb 19, 2012

QuilavaKing said:
Anyway, how about a question? After coming out, did you/would you date any of your old friends?

I didn't give half a sh-- I didn't care about dating at all, ever, until I was well out of high school. I was probably 21 before I ever fell for anyone, or cared to. I also had other issues, because for the longest time I juggled being bi, being transgender, or being a lesbian. -w- So that screwed with ever dating anyone ever. I've stopped labeling myself since then, because it's the labels that screw with my head "I have to fit one or it's wrong!". Dating is still something that stays in the back of my head. I've fallen for a few people online, but absolutely no one in real life, and most of the time I don't even think about it. I'm too busy with my interests, in that way I think I'm asexual to a point. I've come out to multiple co-workers as being a lesbian, but I still haven't gone for any dating. Eventually I will.

I also tried dating my best friend IRL some time ago, who's a guy, and I figured "Well, I can crush on guys online..SO MAYBE", but nope. Don't wanna date guys at all. Don't care for them physically. xD;

Shining Raichu · Feb 19, 2012

No, none of my friends were gay. It's unfortunate, because a lot of them were hot and given half the chance I would have jumped them faster than a... fast thing that jumps. I lost my virginity to somebody I knew from school though, but he wasn't exactly a friend so much as just an acquaintance. So I never really had any icky feelings about it lol

[Snivy Baroque] · Feb 19, 2012

I wouldn't, I only think one of them is gay, and that's not a for sure thing so I'm not taking any chances, even if he is the cutest guy in school.

-Jared- · Feb 19, 2012

Well, none of my friends are gay, that I know of. So I can't say that I would. However, if there was a friend who like, came out because I did, I might if he wanted to. I probably wouldn't go ask him though, since I would be too nervous about it. xD

Kano Shuuya · Feb 19, 2012

I could say the same, and that's another issue.
I've never even met another person who fell anywhere in the LGBT category, unless they were waaay older, or a guy. xD;

The Rainbow Connection [LGBTS Club]

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