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  #1    
Old November 8th, 2007 (01:58 PM).
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Hey, for the past few days, me and my friend Kiyoshi_kun077 have been coming up with stuff for a Pokemon fanfic that we plan to create as a manga. It takes place in Sinnoh, and its about 2 kids who are about to set off on a long journey. Theres Alden, the main character who is 12 and a half years old, and Kiyoshi (Kiyo), his best friend, whom is also 12 years old. Alden was born in Rustboro city and raised there, til he was about 5 or 6. His father, whom was also a pokemon trainer on a journey to get the Sinnoh badges, was killed, and the only Pokemon of his that was found was his Absol...whom had a mysterious scar on his right eye. Afterwards, Alden and his mom moved to Sandgem town in Sinnoh. This was convenient for them because there was a Pokemon school right in the town above them, Jubilife. Alden was enrolled as a student there, where he meets Kiyoshi, whom becomes his best friend over the years. Kiyoshi didnt live near Jubilife, actually he lived quite a while away in Hearthome. His parents would fly him to school every day. Eventually there was a test at the Poke-school, you had to successfully catch a pokemon within the time limit of the class...which was when Alden catches his first Pokemon, a Poliwag. Years down the road (where the story begins), Alden gets a newsletter in the mail from the Pokemon club about a special Doubles battle tournament taking place in Jubilife city over the weekend, the winner gets 10000 money and 2 cruise tickets to kanto for a few days. He calls Kiyo and tells him about it, and he agrees to be his partner in the tournament. Alden told his mom about it, and she entrusted him with his fathers Absol. Well, when the day came, Kiyo gets a call...from Professor Rowan, asking him to head over to the lab for a moment. So, he got over there as fast as possible, and Rowan gave him a Pokedex. Kiyo then flew over to Jubilife as fast as possible...and he was merely seconds from having himself and Alden disqualified, as it was time for their match to begin. Well, they end up winning the tournament...and a certain person in the audience was so impressed that she challenged them to a match...Cynthia. She crushed them...they didnt have a chance, since the only trained Pokemon that they had was Absol. And, they headed off to Kanto...Kiyo was actually born in Celadon, and he wanted to introduce Alden to a friend of his fathers, a professor. He had just finished a new device called the Pokemon Analyzer, or P.A. for short. It is worn like a pair of sunglasses, though it has the same functionality as a Pokedex. There was a button on the side used to scan Pokemon data. Since Kiyo already had a Pokedex, it was given to Alden. They traveled back to Sinnoh...when Alden got an idea. He wanted to finish what his father started, and get all 8 of the Sinnoh badges. Each Gym's just started holding doubles matches, so Kiyo decided to go with him, so they can become the Doubles champions of Sinnoh.

Still workin out kinks and stuff, but thats what we've got so far.
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Old November 8th, 2007 (02:24 PM).
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Insteaf of posting it all here and giving everything away, why not just make it into a fanfic?
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Old November 8th, 2007 (02:46 PM).
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Because we have both decided that we were going to do a manga, since we both agreed to do a manga together earlier this year. This was just what we decided on. And trust me, I hardly gave anything away...XD...just wanted to know what people thought about it.
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Old November 8th, 2007 (02:51 PM).
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I know, I meant just post it in the fanfiction section!
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Old November 8th, 2007 (03:00 PM).
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ehh...just wanted to get some oppinions on it. Im fine with it here.
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Old November 8th, 2007 (03:12 PM). Edited November 8th, 2007 by Hero.
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You should probably make it into a Fan Fiction first to see how people like the stroy and then work on a manga.
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Old November 9th, 2007 (01:49 PM).
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Hero's right. Before you go through all the trouble of drawing the manga and getting the story down, it might be best to start it off as a fanfic to get opinions on the story. I think that's what another member did, as he posted the story to his doujinshi to get opinions on it, and he's now handling the art aspect of it.

But really, it's your decision as to what to do with it all. If you and your friend want to just keep it as a manga and skip out the part about writing a fic first, then go ahead.

As for the actual plot itself, the beginning is actually more interesting, with the tournament and Cynthia challenging them. I'm not sure if since you have more of a back story to Kiyo and Alden that their quest around Sinnoh will be interesting or not. Right now, that part just seems like a typical "let's travel around a region!" bit. But I guess if you place in a few parts where Alden wants to get to the bottom of the mystery of how his father died, then that'll make it interesting, and give places for character development.

That said, good luck with this project.

(And story ideas tend to go to the Fanfiction Lounge, but I'll leave this thread open so you can respond to what's been posted.)
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Old November 17th, 2007 (02:56 PM).
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Try separating your paragraphs into the least you can. That'll do 'ya a world 'o good!
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