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Old June 3rd, 2008 (09:01 AM). Edited June 3rd, 2008 by Alli.
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Okay, this is my first [posted] oneshot. Those who know me will know I like a miiiiiillion ships, so...yeah. Haven't written on this ship yet.

READ THIS BEFORE YOU READ A WORD OF THIS STORY!
This story deals with some pretty intense material. Not the action, but mentioning. If you have a problem with abuse(of any kind) or rape, I suggest you hit the back button.

This is rated PG-13 - R, and like mentioned above, it deals with intense things. If you're going to be immature about it, hit the back button NOW. You have been warned.


Face Down
By: SilverSmeargleSplatter

There she was. She lay beside a tree on her injured side, weeping to herself. Cold water droplets from the dark night sky fell on her limp body. Her yellow dress was tattered, and her bare feet were blackened from running. She was a little dirty herself, but even still, she was beautiful. Her long, silky blonde hair draped over her and her once innocent eyes stared vacantly ahead of her. Those eyes used to shine a bright, golden yellow, but that was gone now. Her soft face used to express youthful joy—complete happiness. But, this too, was absent. Her face was now blank, apathetic, and lost in despair.

The rain continued to fall on her. It was cold, but it soothed her. The chill of the rain was numbing the physical injuries she had endured. She could no longer feel that pain—the pain of a strike to the face or broken glass against her skin. Sadly, it was still obvious what she had struggled through. The bruises, scratches, and scars still remained. There was much recovering for Yellow to do.

“I’ve had enough,” she whispered weakly to herself, still staring ahead.

In her current condition, there was nothing Yellow could do. She was lucky to have made it to where she was now. All she could do was lie there and continue to watch the rain fall, and pray that he would not be on the hunt for her. He would drag her from her safe haven and throw her back into the hell she had just escaped. And then there was the punishment for running away…

Yellow shuddered at the thought and continued watching the rain, now with fear in her eyes.

If he finds me, I’m done for, she thought. But this is what he wants…he wants me to be afraid. That’s how he wins…

“The only thing we have to fear is fear itself,” she said to herself, her eyes now shifting around, searching for anything else to bring hope.

“He is fear,” she whispered before starting to sob once again. “What did I get myself into?”

Yellow clutched the dirt underneath her hands. What could she do at this point? She could not get up and run, as her legs were too sore from injuries, and still tired from running away. “Help…” she whispered weakly, “please…”

Time was passing slowly and painfully, with only the sound of Yellow’s sobs and the skies' tears.

The silent passing was interrupted by the sound of a twig being snapped behind her.

Yellow’s heart started to pound furiously. She could not turn around to see who—or what—it was, which frightened her even more. Still, she remained silent and hoped she could be invisible to the oncoming stranger.

“Hello?” a familiar voice called from the trees.

Yellow gasped from hearing a voice of decent tone—not yelling, not screaming, but pleasant to hear.

A young man holding a large, black umbrella over his spiky brown hair walked out from the trees. His black jacket kept him warm from the cold rain and his jeans and black boots had splotches of mud on them. His bright green eyes studied Yellow curiously. He did not overreact to the sight, but still looked at her body with concern.

“Yellow?” he called quietly.

“Green!” she replied quickly, her eyes now wide with hope.

Green walked closer to Yellow and knelt down beside her, still examining her injured body. He was in awe—how could anyone mistreat this sweet soul?

“Yellow,” he said as he gingerly placed his hand over hers, “I’ll help you.”

He leaned his umbrella against the tree and gently lifted Yellow from where she lay into his arms.

“Green, I…I wish I didn’t…” she whispered, but started to cry into Green’s jacket.

“Yellow, who did this?” Green asked with a concerned tone in his voice.

“I can’t tell you!” Yellow cried. “He’ll do it again! I can’t!!”

She started to struggle away, but Green tightened his hold on her. “Yellow, don’t be like this. I just want to know who could hurt this beautiful face,” he reassured her, giving her a small smile and wiping a tear from her face.

Yellow looked into Green’s sincere, emerald eyes. She could not help but to smile back—a smile she had long since forsaken.

“There you go! I haven’t seen that smile in a long time!”

“I know…” Yellow replied with a small laugh.

There was a silence as Green and Yellow sat in their embrace. Green slowly stroked Yellow’s silky blonde hair to comfort her. Yellow felt safe in Green’s arms, a feeling she had not had felt in a long time. She was so used to living in fear and pain that she had long forgotten what it felt like to be safe.

But there was another feeling. She could not quite put her finger on it, but it was a good feeling. She felt as if her life was going to get better from that point—a feeling like hope, but with something more to it. Hope was only a minor part of this feeling. There was a lot more. Warmth, joy, security—a mixture of feelings that combined into a more intense sensation. She just could not name it.

“He didn’t always treat me this way.” Yellow said solemnly, ending the silence.

“Who?” Green asked calmly. He didn’t want to pester her or make her feel uneasy.

“Lance. The first six months were just fine, but then he…he started to go back to his old self. He still wants a utopia for Pokemon. Every time I would try to protest his ideas, he would…he…” Yellow started to hesitate. She had never told this to anyone.

“It’s okay. You can tell me,” Green assured her while tightening his embrace.

“He would hit me, Green. Tell me I was stupid and hit me…”

“Yellow, I’m so sorry,” Green replied quietly.

"Then he started drinking…a lot.” Yellow continued with a frantic tone, “He’s a brutal drunkard. I can’t tell you how many bottles I’ve been a target for, or how many beatings I’ve suffered through.”

“Did he do anything else to you?” Green asked anxiously.

At this question, Yellow let her self out of Green’s hold so that she could look him in the eyes.

“The worst,” she started reluctantly, shifting her eyes around to avoid tears, “is that when I wouldn’t give in to his demands…he would take it upon himself to get what he wanted.”

“Yellow, he didn’t—“

“He would rape me…” Yellow whispered, almost to where one couldn’t hear her voice.

Green pulled Yellow into a strong embrace. He did not want to let her go now, not after everything Yellow had just told him.

But there was something about holding Yellow that made Green happy. Just knowing that she could tell him something as serious as her relationship with Lance assured him that she truly trusted him, and that he could do the same with her. But there was more to this feeling, and he realized what it was.

“Yellow, look at me,” Green said abruptly.

Yellow’s golden yellow eyes gazed up into Green’s bright, emerald eyes. Green leaned in closer to Yellow’s face and kissed her lips softly.

Yellow wrapped her arms around Green and rested her head on his chest.

“I love you,” Green whispered in her ear.

Yellow did not say anything, but her tighter hug said enough to Green.

This was a new beginning—this time with someone who cared.
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  #2    
Old June 3rd, 2008 (09:16 AM).
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-tear-

*Sniff* Uhm... erm... that was... GOOD! So much emotion and feeling put into words, great words, it made me understand. I felt everything that both characters went through. All of the pain and struggles... just WOW. Nice work. Makes mine look like crap :D.

Really? That's the first one-shot you posted? I'd like to see a lot more of your one-shot work Silver.
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Old June 3rd, 2008 (09:22 AM).
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Quote:
-tear-

*Sniff* Uhm... erm... that was... GOOD! So much emotion and feeling put into words, great words, it made me understand. I felt everything that both characters went through. All of the pain and struggles... just WOW. Nice work. Makes mine look like crap :D.

Really? That's the first one-shot you posted? I'd like to see a lot more of your one-shot work Silver.
Wow! That was quick! xD Thanks. I finished it last night...really late. I just had to post it today for some reason.

And about other oneshots, my sister and I are working on an uber parody oneshot. xD It'll be a break from all the despair fics/oneshots I've written and/or thought about.
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  #4    
Old June 3rd, 2008 (01:19 PM).
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Going through this in the quote reply box. It's good to see you've posted, though. =3

Quote originally posted by SilverSmeargleSplatter:
There she was. She lay beside a tree on her injured side, weeping to herself. Cold water droplets from the dark night sky fell on her limp body. Her yellow dress was tattered, and her bare feet were blackened from running. She was a little dirty herself, but even still, she was beautiful.
I must say I love how this begins. You go into imagery right off the bat to drag the reader into your world and feel what Yellow is feeling. In other words, you grab the reader's attention right here and now, which is always promising for a beginning.

Quote:
“He is fear,” she whispered and started to sob once again.
Somehow, I feel as if it would be better to separate this out, either by using "as she" or "before she" instead of "and." Otherwise, it almost feels as if the whispering isn't so much a dialogue tag as it is part of another sentence, if that makes sense. Technically, though, I'm almost certain it's grammatically correct, but it just sounds a little on the awkward side.

Quote:
Time was passing slowly and painfully, with only the sound of Yellow’s sobs and the skies tears.
Sky's? Skies'? Either could probably be correct, but it's still a possessive.

Quote:
The silent passing was interrupted by the sound of a twig being snapped from behind her.
I think you can get away with just saying "behind her," rather than "from behind her." From implies that it's passing her.

Quote:
:Then he started drinking…a lot.”
Quotation mark instead of a colon in front.

Quote:
“The worst,” she started reluctantly, shifting her eyes around to avoid tears.
Since you're continuing into the rest of the quote, you'll actually want a comma instead of a period to show that the sentence isn't ending.

Quote:
“He would rape me…” Yellow whispered, almost to where you couldn’t hear her voice.
I would suggest replacing "you" with "one" or "Green." That way, you keep the reader out of the narrative and just focus on the sounds as they seem to the characters, if that makes sense. Generally, with third person stories, you'll want to avoid putting things in second person anyway, just because of standard formatting. *shrug*

Quote:
“I love you.” Green whispered in her ear.
Since you're going into a dialogue tag, you'll want to put in a comma instead of a period after "you." That's just so the reader knows that the part outside of the quotation marks is associated with the part inside.


Overall, to tell you the truth, aside from the little grammar nitpicks, it was good. I admit I'm not entirely familiar with Special (at least, not familiar with the interactions between Green and Yellow), so I wasn't sure whether or not the two were in character. For Yellow, I think it's logical to be in that state, but I've always thought that Green was a bit more apathetic. (I'm mostly referring to how he came out and said Yellow had a beautiful face here.) On the other hand, again, I'm not entirely sure about characterization. ^_^;

The romance itself was believable. I mean, I can understand how someone who was abused would be out alone, away from the thing that abused her (and, for that matter, I can see how Lance's passions would lead him to want to abuse someone). You don't go overboard (but manage to pull off emotion nicely, with the ambiance and the characters' actions really saying most of it, if not all of it), and the characters don't go from meeting to "I want in your pants" in two seconds flat, both mistakes that other romances tend to make. Simply put, this really is better than a lot of other romance fics I've read. Good job! *thumbs up*
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  #5    
Old June 3rd, 2008 (01:34 PM). Edited June 3rd, 2008 by Alli.
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and the characters don't go from meeting to "I want in your pants" in two seconds flat,
OMG. Who writes that?! xD

Quote:
Overall, to tell you the truth, aside from the little grammar nitpicks, it was good. I admit I'm not entirely familiar with Special (at least, not familiar with the interactions between Green and Yellow), so I wasn't sure whether or not the two were in character. For Yellow, I think it's logical to be in that state, but I've always thought that Green was a bit more apathetic. (I'm mostly referring to how he came out and said Yellow had a beautiful face here.) On the other hand, again, I'm not entirely sure about characterization. ^_^;

The romance itself was believable. I mean, I can understand how someone who was abused would be out alone, away from the thing that abused her (and, for that matter, I can see how Lance's passions would lead him to want to abuse someone). You don't go overboard (but manage to pull off emotion nicely, with the ambiance and the characters' actions really saying most of it, if not all of it), and the characters don't go from meeting to "I want in your pants" in two seconds flat, both mistakes that other romances tend to make. Simply put, this really is better than a lot of other romance fics I've read. Good job! *thumbs up*
Thanks, Jaxeh. :D I'd go on a rant about my feelings about FeelingShipping, but no one wants to hear it. But, it would better explain their interaction...also, I didn't include their ages. O_O I couldn't find an open gap to do so, so...I guess it's best left hush hush.



Edit: OMG.

I spelled draped right. That word lost me the spelling bee in 6th grade...I just noticed that. xD
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Old June 3rd, 2008 (02:59 PM).
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Quote originally posted by SilverSmeargleSplatter:
OMG. Who writes that?! xD
Everyone ever on FFNet (and the early days of the Pokemon fandom, when people put up fanfic websites because no one heard of FFNet). It's hilarious at some points, but at others, it makes the fangirl in me cry.

Quote:
also, I didn't include their ages. O_O I couldn't find an open gap to do so, so...I guess it's best left hush hush.
Yeah, it's probably better if you didn't, I think. It's understood that they're older than they are in Special, so if you actually gave them a fixed age, it might come off looking like those fics that feel it's absolutely necessary to list everyone and their mothers' (sometimes literally) ages at the very top of the first page.

Quote:
I spelled draped right. That word lost me the spelling bee in 6th grade...I just noticed that. xD
Huzzah! =D
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Old June 3rd, 2008 (04:19 PM).
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nyaaah!
Excellent job, Silver! I may be a Grantedshipper, but feelingshipping comes close.(In reality Feeling actually tops Special.)
Keep up the good work!
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Old June 4th, 2008 (06:21 AM).
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Everyone ever on FFNet (and the early days of the Pokemon fandom, when people put up fanfic websites because no one heard of FFNet). It's hilarious at some points, but at others, it makes the fangirl in me cry.
Hmmm. Makes me wanna go read one. >:D

But I have insane fangirl in me...so...maybe not. -hides-

Quote:
Huzzah! =D
:D No more lost spelling bees!!

Quote:
nyaaah!
Excellent job, Silver! I may be a Grantedshipper, but feelingshipping comes close.(In reality Feeling actually tops Special.)
Keep up the good work!
I don't really think Feeling tops Special. But, it definately tops Granted. This story kinda personifies my feelings about GrantedShipping. If you notice, Yellow said the first six months were fine, but...you know, it got bad from there. That's really what I think would happen if GrantedShipping ever became canon. Or, there's my other opinion on it...which you can find out if you read a certain person's lemon.
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  #9    
Old July 21st, 2008 (12:48 PM). Edited July 21st, 2008 by Blue Angel.
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Aww, Cute... Green was Yellow's savior. Now he can protect her from "evil"
Nice how you quoted that guy whose name I can't remember:
"The only thing to fear, is fear itself."
You also vividly describe the aspects/characteristics of someone who has been raped.
It's like when someone goes to war and then the come back.
They both change you...
Yay, 5 stars

EDIT: For clarification, I was not saying anyone went to war in this fic. I was using it as another example, next to rape. Both war and rape change a person for the worst - that is what I meant.
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Old July 21st, 2008 (01:18 PM).
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This is probably the best shipping fanfic I have ever read. It was so tragic, the way yellow described her relationship with lance. I can't wait for the next chapter!
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Old July 27th, 2008 (08:56 AM).
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O man..... (sighs) wow..... that's a intense story....
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Old July 27th, 2008 (01:25 PM).
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I really like it. That was really good. I can ignore grammatical mistakes when reading good stories like this.
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Old April 12th, 2009 (12:02 AM).
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I never really ships Green x Yellow, but this fanfic, it's just awesome!
Too short, though. It gives me an impression that the flow of the story is just too fast. In my opinion, this fanfic will be much better if you added several flashback scenes. But that's just me anyway.
But I do have to admit that the ending was... beautiful.
Keep on writing! =D
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Old April 12th, 2009 (01:14 PM).
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Don't bump threads over a month old. Reread the rules before posting in this section again. Yadayada.

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