• Our software update is now concluded. You will need to reset your password to log in. In order to do this, you will have to click "Log in" in the top right corner and then "Forgot your password?".
  • Welcome to PokéCommunity! Register now and join one of the best fan communities on the 'net to talk Pokémon and more! We are not affiliated with The Pokémon Company or Nintendo.
    Register

Should the legal age for marriage be raised?

Yusshin

♪ Yggdrasil ♪
2,414
Posts
14
Years
Izanagi said:
Legally, it's pedofillia for a 16 year old to have relations with a 23 year old.
Click to expand...

Unless the parents are fine with it.

My parents were fine with it. A 16-year-old and a 23-year-old doesn't happen often, but in this case, anyone under 19 I deemed immature and disgusting. I don't believe in dating in highschool. I don't believe in sexual affairs with more than one person in a lifetime. It's very sacred; age is but a number, unless it becomes extreme, like 25 and 12. That's just wrong. 16 and 23 is fine, though, and although a lot of people would disagree, many would agree, too.

I'm 17 currently; he's 24. He'll be 25 in June, and I, 18 in October. There's certainly nothing wrong with that.

Zettu:

It's a serious relationship; we don't find strip clubs or bars "thrilling" or "fun". Our values are against it. A nice movie or a walk is much more fun :]

Forever:

I don't see why one should wait; we'll get married eventually, and that's a fact. Why wait until 22 when we can just do it when I turn 18? It's not "rushing"; it's merely getting something that's inevitable out of the way.

I think you're under-estimating the perfection of our togetherness :< but it's to be expected, since not many couples like us exist anymore. We're very "old-fashioned" with our values and morals, and that's what really helps to perfect us.
 

xJordan360

plurfection.
349
Posts
14
Years
  • Age 31
  • 541
  • Seen Jan 2, 2014
Forever said:
..Either way, I still think Yusshin should wait a few years before marriage. The age difference just doesn't seem right in this case. Shouldn't need to rush.
Click to expand...

You're signature discredits the validity of your post ;]
 

Sotto Voce

woohoo!!
120
Posts
14
Years
That's an interesting concept--I never really put much thought into it until I read this.
It's hard for me to say whether it would be good or not to raise the age...
I am inclined to say "yes" for obvious maturity reasons, although I do know people who were married very very young (at 18) and have had stayed married and have had good marriages, but that's exceedingly rare (the rest don't end as well--foolishness, I say) as far as I know, so I see no harm in raising the limit.

I think it would be a good thing, in fact--maybe it would lower the divorce rate in the U.S. And it would do no harm--if a couple truly are in love, then what's the harm in waiting? They can move in together and all the rest...
 
Last edited:

Ho-Oh

used Sacred Fire!
35,992
Posts
18
Years
  • Age 31
  • Seen Jul 1, 2023
Yusshin said:
Forever:

I don't see why one should wait; we'll get married eventually, and that's a fact. Why wait until 22 when we can just do it when I turn 18? It's not "rushing"; it's merely getting something that's inevitable out of the way.

I think you're under-estimating the perfection of our togetherness :< but it's to be expected, since not many couples like us exist anymore.
Click to expand...

I understand what you mean, but still. That'll equal society judging you, if you really care, waiting a few years, so that people can appreciate how in love you two are is good.

xJordan360 said:
You're signature discredits the validity of your post ;]
Click to expand...

..Those are lyrics.
 

Yusshin

♪ Yggdrasil ♪
2,414
Posts
14
Years
Forever said:
I understand what you mean, but still. That'll equal society judging you, if you really care, waiting a few years, so that people can appreciate how in love you two are is good.
Click to expand...

I don't really bother to see how others view us, though. If they like us together, that's great; if not, oh well. My parents, for example, are fine with the matter, but they don't like my fiance at all. They wouldn't do anything to him, though, since they respect my decision. All of our friends are awe-struck as well by the fact that we're very, very different from the "standard" couple of today. It's apparent that we have something special that only exists in one in a million people. I don't care if people judge me or him. Their judging is just a way for them to feel at ease with the situation; I could really care less about what they have to say about it, unless I'm in danger in some way and I don't see it. In this case, there's absolutely no harm. We have goals and we have each other. That's all that really matters in the end - not what others have to say about it.

Izanagi:

Actually, it's not, unless the parents object. Maybe in American Law, but not Canadian - and I live in Canada.

15 and 22 is 100% illegal; 16 and 23 is not, unless the parents object. At 18, there is no limit, although more than 12 years difference is what I call "icky".

I do believe you need to stop referring to age, though. A 16-year-old girl is maturer than a 19-year-old boy, if the girl is at least somewhat intelligent and not brainwashed by clothing fads. Age is only a number; it does not rate maturity level.

Speaking of maturity level, marriage should be based on that and not age. There are some 18-year-old quackjobs out there, and some really, really mature 17-year-olds. Although it would be difficult to go by maturity (and thus why age is used instead), that would definitely be a better way of determining when someone is mentally "ready" for marriage.
 
Last edited:

Izanagi

Jesus Saves.
467
Posts
14
Years
  • Age 27
  • Seen Mar 14, 2011
I just realized you're from Canadia. Legally, my mistake, but I still disagree with your opinion. Including the 16 year old girls being more mature than 19 year old boys. I'm more mature than alot of people I know, especially teenage girls.
 

Ho-Oh

used Sacred Fire!
35,992
Posts
18
Years
  • Age 31
  • Seen Jul 1, 2023
Good points, but still, if the age were raised, then those, such as yourself, who wish to be married now... can be better reassured that the decision is right?
 

Yusshin

♪ Yggdrasil ♪
2,414
Posts
14
Years
It applies to men as well, not just girls - although it is a fact that girls mature faster than boys do, and not just physically (that's why you always see little 10-year-olds with "crushes" and boys don't reach that until around 14 or 15).

It really depends on the individual.

Forever:

I don't understand :s Can you rephrase that?
 
Shiny

Shiny

content creator on twitch
4,039
Posts
17
Years
Nica, that's the chance you take with love, my parents have only dated each other, no one else and they've been married for 27 happy years.
 

Yusshin

♪ Yggdrasil ♪
2,414
Posts
14
Years
Jubilation said:
Nica, that's the chance you take with love, my parents have only dated each other, no one else and they've been married for 27 happy years.
Click to expand...

That's really awesome. You don't see that often, really. I'm in the same boat as them, though (the "love" boat? lol!)

[Edit]

I took the time to edit this because that joke up there ^ was really corny.

You know what? I completely spaced on something!

I had this question in my law homework last week! You know what I answered?

People should know each other for at least three years and be living together everyday for at least two years in order to be valid for marriage. This allows couples to experience tough situations and view how their partner would respond, and it would also determine whether or not they remain stable and non-abusive, loyal, respectful, etc. in such a living condition.

I don't really mind age; like said, maturity is moreso the factor here and it ranges dramatically from person to person. I'm moreso concerned with those who jump into a marriage thinking they love each other to death, and then six months later, they divorce. I'd prefer to prevent those divorces due to "surprises" and unseen situations by putting people in such testing, tough situations before any papers are signed. Guaranteed that less divorces would occur if that were to exist :|
 
Last edited:
Ryoutarou

Ryoutarou

30,928
Posts
20
Years
  • Seen Apr 2, 2023
Yusshin, I don't quite think I agree with everything you've said, though I do agree with a good deal of it, I really do like how you're able to stick to your guns on what you believe when it comes to something so out there.

I've never been a fan of mandating ages to when a person can do something or is legally considered an adult. In the U.S., if you're 18, you're old enough to sign up for armed services and face death, yet you aren't quite old enough to drink an alcoholic beverage. Now, does that actually make sense? Maturity comes with experience, not age, and different people will take in experiences in vastly different ways. So if there really must be an age to where person is considered an adult, they should be legally within their rights to do whatever they want with their lives, marriage included.

16/17 is...a little young, I would say, but again, people view certain experiences in different manners, so it's very likely to have a 16 year old who is more stable than someone twice the age. If you feel that you're truly ready to get married, then go for it, nothing should stand in the way of your happiness, certainly not what society thinks of you. Of course...this also means that if you believe you're ready for marriage, you're ready to live on your own as a couple, pay your own bills, and generally take care of yourselves. Wording this part is a little tricky, but I...generally think one doesn't need to live a materially comfortable life in that aspect. If you have somewhere to live, that's really all that should matter in my opinion. I've always found it odd when people say a person's financial status is...not so much of a reason as to why they would marry, but an indicator that the person is mature and responsible. It most certainly is not and should have no play in your decision to get married, one of the most common wedding vows out there is that you promise to love your partner within richness and poorness. You strive to provide each other a good life because you want your partner to be comfortable, but it isn't the reason you marry one another, you do that because you want to be there next to that person, spending every moment you can with them, because you love them.

Of course I certainly don't think every person who looks at their relationship lightly and says "Yup, I'm ready!" is ready, they do need to examine every aspect of the relationship carefully before they do anything else. If after all of that, they truly do believe marriage is for them, then I say go for it.
 

Yusshin

♪ Yggdrasil ♪
2,414
Posts
14
Years
I completely agree with you Ryoutarou; I'm sure you'd approve if you saw a video of everything we've already been through as a couple and still are as fine and dandy as ever o-o (i.e. eviction, being suddenly jobless, parents that really don't approve (mine because he's arab; his because I'm not 18 yet - my dad likes to refer to him as "that terrorist guy" ><), hunger, separation for a year, etc.)

<3 He's still mah sweetpea.

Totally 100% agree with the maturity thing, and the army vs. alcohol ordeal is dumb :s although in Canada, you can drink at 18/19 pending the province.
 

Reginaldvonburger

98
Posts
13
Years
Didn't read the other posts because there's a lot and I just wanted to get straight to the main points.
No, I don't think it should be raised. There's nothing wrong with two people loving each other and wanting to share that love with their closest family and friends. In the UK the legal age for sex is 16, and the legal age for marriage (With parental consent) is 16. My cousin got married at 17/18, and his wife was pregnant at the time and they have no problems and love each other a lot.

To be honest, if my boyfriend proposed to me, I would say yes right now because we're in the sort of relationship where you know you're going to be together for life, or at least a very long time.
Age plays no part in love, maturity is what it's about. You can be 30 and still as immature as a teenager, or 14 and as mature as an adult. It's all about different personalities and the way different peoples mind works. I don't think anything like this should be changed, it just doesn't seem fair that people should wait till their in their 20's to get married. I mean, my parents were together at 16/17, had their first child at 18/19 and got married around 20. They're still together nearly 20 years later. I see no reason why it should be increased, as many people do not get married so young.
 

Pazuru

★ [ Fukidokuritsu ]
137
Posts
14
Years
  • Seen Jan 29, 2013
I'm too lazy to read the other points, but I just wanted to say that perhaps raising it to 21 might be a good thing. 18 might be good to some others, but think about it. It's almost saying 'I'M AN ADULT OKAY TIME TO GET MARRIED', when you should probably learn how to be an adult (taxes, being able to keep up with money) before getting married, eventually having kids, and such. I don't want to marry at 18, and then be in big trouble money wise because I wasn't money-stable or anything.
 

Reginaldvonburger

98
Posts
13
Years
Pazuru said:
I'm too lazy to read the other points, but I just wanted to say that perhaps raising it to 21 might be a good thing. 18 might be good to some others, but think about it. It's almost saying 'I'M AN ADULT OKAY TIME TO GET MARRIED', when you should probably learn how to be an adult (taxes, being able to keep up with money) before getting married, eventually having kids, and such. I don't want to marry at 18, and then be in big trouble money wise because I wasn't money-stable or anything.
Click to expand...

My boyfriend is 17, 18 next month, and has already been dealing with Tax, money issues and rent to his parents, so he's pretty good with money.

It depends on the people entirely.
 

Yusshin

♪ Yggdrasil ♪
2,414
Posts
14
Years
Pazuru said:
I'm too lazy to read the other points, but I just wanted to say that perhaps raising it to 21 might be a good thing. 18 might be good to some others, but think about it. It's almost saying 'I'M AN ADULT OKAY TIME TO GET MARRIED', when you should probably learn how to be an adult (taxes, being able to keep up with money) before getting married, eventually having kids, and such. I don't want to marry at 18, and then be in big trouble money wise because I wasn't money-stable or anything.
Click to expand...

If someone experienced that first-hand for over a year while living with their partner, you'd approve, correct? For example, if you're 16 living with "that person" until 18 and supporting yourselves for two years, how would you feel about that?

Just wanting to see if we're on the same page :P
 
Esper

Esper

10,769
Posts
14
Years
I'd say generally when you (hypothetical you - not singling anyone out) are legally an adult you should be free to do anything adults can do legally. If you get married too soon and it doesn't work out then that's what divorce is for. Hopefully you haven't brought children into the mix, but if you think you're ready for marriage then you have to be willing to take on any responsibilities that might come your way.

Personally I'd like to see people waiting to get married, but I'm not going to tell them they shouldn't solely because of their age.
 

Pazuru

★ [ Fukidokuritsu ]
137
Posts
14
Years
  • Seen Jan 29, 2013
Yusshin said:


If someone experienced that first-hand for over a year while living with their partner, you'd approve, correct? For example, if you're 16 living with "that person" until 18 and supporting yourselves for two years, how would you feel about that?

Just wanting to see if we're on the same page :P
Click to expand...

If you've already been financially stable for a few years, and have already been in doing taxes, and all other things that adults must do for several years, then I don't see a problem with it. The problem I have is people entering '18' the adult world and getting married before getting financially stable and knowing the adult responsibilities you now have.
 

Yusshin

♪ Yggdrasil ♪
2,414
Posts
14
Years
Pazuru said:


If you've already been financially stable for a few years, and have already been in doing taxes, and all other things that adults must do for several years, then I don't see a problem with it. The problem I have is people entering '18' the adult world and getting married before getting financially stable and knowing the adult responsibilities you now have.
Click to expand...

Yeah, exactly why I answered in my law homework that the minimum amount of time together in the same household before allowing to become married should be two years xD so you experience this stuff and know how your partner is going to react to certain situations.

Someone you know might react shockingly to pressure and other bad situations :s They might also be terrible with cash. Who knows? Ya need to be together a long time in the same place first to know.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top