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  #1    
Old June 10th, 2010, 08:10 PM
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The Plot Bunny Thread



Welcome to the Plot Bunny Thread. This thread is simply to post any story ideas you may have and receive feedback on them, or perhaps help provide feedback to other people’s ideas.



Some things to note before posting:


  • The more detailed the summary of your idea, the better. Simply saying ‘trainer fic where the main character has a broken leg’ provides less information for people to work with as opposed to actually mentioning how, for example, the broken leg will affect the character in the story, how it happened, etc. Of course you needn’t have to go into such detail, particularly if you are unsure you want to reveal so much information about your story, but generally the more the better. This also includes what you are basing your story off (e.g. the anime, or the games, or maybe a specific manga) and things like that.
  • The above is also the case with feedback. Responding ‘I like the idea’ for instance is…nice to know, but not helpful and is spammy (and spam [short pointless annoying messages] is against the forum-wide rules). Rather, mention what you like (or dislike) about the idea, offer advice/suggestions, ask a question if you’re curious about a point… basically, in-depth discussion of ideas is encouraged here, so don’t be shy.
  • Before you post your idea, please check the next post which contains the Plot Bunny Guide. It offers some basic things to consider about your idea before posting and also how to come up with/develop ideas, and may very well be of help to you.
  • Don’t argue and be civil – please don’t ask people to get out of the thread or whatnot because you may not agree with each other, or outright say someone is stupid for having such-and-such an idea, and so forth. If there happens to be flaming going on remember it’s better to report and leave it for a mod/higher up to deal with it, not you.
  • This isn’t restricted to Pokémon fics – any fandom-related (or original story) ideas can be discussed here – note though that one is more likely to get more feedback on Pokémon fics because this IS a Pokémon forum.
  • Please don’t advertise if you decide to go ahead with it and use it in a fic – save that for your signature, as advertising is against the rules.


And with that, post away!
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  #2    
Old June 10th, 2010, 08:12 PM
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Story Ideas Guide



Got a story idea that you think will take the world forum by storm? Or maybe you are unsure about how much potential it has or indeed if it’d make for an interesting story? Alternatively, you may be unsure how to develop an idea or find inspiration? Whatever the situation, the Guide may or may not have something that will help you. To find out…well, read on!


Why is Plotting important?


Why indeed? Because chances are if you jump into a story blindly, you stand a bigger chance of running out of steam/ideas before you’re done, and the story will add itself to the ever-growing mound of unfinished stories out there. Furthermore, plotting and planning out even the bare bones of the story gives you a better idea of what the story looks like and may help you catch some potential plot holes or problems earlier rather than later. And it tends to be easier to fix it in the planning stage rather than when you’re halfway through your fic realising you’ll have to either change your idea or go back and edit.


How to Come Up with the Plot


The first step in making a story tends to be considering what the story is about – what characters, what happens, and so forth – but the first problem is coming up with those things in the first place, and how to do that. First thing you should probably consider is to not rush your plotting – it applies to writing, and should apply to your plotting. When you think of a detail or event to use, take the time to consider the implications of it. As for finding inspiration or ideas to use - there isn’t any sure-fire way that guarantees a good idea to come about – every person is different. Maybe listening to music helps you think, or going for a quiet walk? Mind-maps or the sort can help to give you a method to see your ideas and organise it out as well.

A good approach to begin with is to go for a top-down approach – that is, start from the big picture (the general story idea itself), and from there work out the smaller details/factors of the story. The problem with trying to start with a small idea or point is that it’s harder to build a small moment or event into something big. However, if you do think up a character or event that interests you but are not sure how to use it – make a note of it! Write it down in a document or notebook and save it for future reference and maybe even use.


The Plotting Itself – Consider the finer details!


After you have the general structure fleshed out, reconsider the smaller details to see if they make sense and how they'll add to the story and work together. So to speak - you've laid down the framework for the metaphorical house which represents the story - now you've got to check out the windows and doors and furniture you put in so you don't end up with the front door sticking out of the roof and the toilet in the kitchen.

For instance, the idea may be ‘Midway through Character X’s adventure through the jungle she encounters a legendary Pokémon Suicune and catches it!’ On the face of it, it seems pretty exciting – jungles, Suicune, trainer has a legendary, stuff’s going to happen.

However, it’s not going to be as simple as that for the reader to take in their stride. How likely is catching a super-rare one/few-of-a-kind Pokémon going to be? Why would Suicune not just run away instead of letting itself get caught? Why did they meet in the first place – fate, chance? How would that affect the rest of the story – how would other characters react to the character having a Suicune? How long would this story be? By considering these things you can build on the idea, flesh it out, as well as figure out for yourself if it’d really make for a good idea or not, and hence a good story.


Overall though there are a lot of points to consider, even if the idea seems simple. Breaking it down into parts:
  • The Genre and Style

Generally, the genre means what is the type/category the story falls under. Figuring out what your story is going to be like and what type of story it is is something better done early on. No point trying to plan a story if you don’t know if it’s a comedy or a tragedy! Consider what genre it would be, and from there decide what features in your story make it that genre, and then write to it.
  • How believable is the story?

This is a rather important point to consider – how believable is the idea going to be for the reader? In other words – how feasible/likely are the events in the story? Generally the more exaggerated and unlikely the events the less believable a story will be – such as say the protagonist finding a Rattata in Kanto is far more likely than a shiny, abandoned Piplup which knows Hyper Beam there.
  • Story length and format

You’d want to figure out as well how the story will be written and how long it may end up being. Is it a one shot, or a full chaptered fic? What point-of-view will it be written from – say 1st (from a character’s perspective) or 3rd (narrator’s?) Maybe it’d be written in a diary format? Whatever the choice it will impact the delivery of the story. Remember however that a story should be as long as it has to be to tell the story.
  • Characters involved?

Basically, consider who will be in the fic. Are they OCs/self-inserts/etc, or canon characters? In the case of the latter appearing also consider how they act in your story and if this is in line with how they act in canon – for having a smoking, swearing, sword-wielding Professor may be an awesome thought, but not if this is what you call Professor Oak – it’ll hurt the aforementioned believability part and just look silly.
  • The finer stuff – Character reactions, consequences, etc

Once you have the general concept down and you are generally satisfied with it, you can work on the finer details. Keep a clear idea of what you’ve thought of so far, and consider how character reactions to events would go, how the events are portrayed and how they affect everything relevant in the story.
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  #3    
Old June 10th, 2010, 10:06 PM
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I only wish this thread was up before I joined PC. It would have helped me so much in formulating the way I want to develop my story. But, I've had that planned out for a while now.
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Old June 20th, 2010, 09:14 PM
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hey im new to writing fan fics and i need advice on this idea im calling it WWP right now or world war pokemon and i want advice onw hat i should do but right now it takes place 10 years after man left earth and the pokemon got smarter and started making machines but eventully a war for domince over the world started and the story follows a officer in the sinnoh army and it follows him thorugh the war and the attack on snowpoint city but if you have advice ,and i know this is not much right now but please tell me
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  #5    
Old June 20th, 2010, 10:21 PM
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Try to hook yourself up with a beta-reader. I'm serious about this one. Your idea sounds pretty cool, but cool ideas can get slaughtered by bad execution (read: bad spelling, grammar, that sort of thing), even if you don't think it matters. (Not saying that you think that. Just saying it for the sake of covering my bases.) Your readers will have an easier time focusing on the story if you make sure your work is clean of errors (so they don't end up spending half the time trying to figure out what you're actually saying).

Betas will also help you out with characterization, plot ideas, and that sort of thing. Like I said, this is an okay plot idea, but it sounds like you haven't come up with too many plot particulars yet. Those are the kinds of things you probably won't figure out until you go and write the story. (For example, you might not figure out Character X's reason for grabbing Literal Plot Device Y until you go to write the scene. A beta-reader is someone who can help you by letting you bounce ideas off them and giving you advice as you write your story. I mean, so can the Writer's Lounge, sure, but this person is usually willing to work closer with you and will probably know your story up until that point.

Beyond that, let's talk about your plot idea itself. While a war story is interesting on the surface, there's a few things you'll want to watch out for:

1. Keep in mind the fact that Pokémon are animals in that world. Some of them are intelligent enough to rival human beings. (Alakazam, I'm looking at you.) If they wanted to build machines by now, chances are, they probably would have. Not only that, but also, even if we ignore the possibility that they're using things like that, it's still the equivalent of saying real-world bears would definitely start inventing advanced machinery if every human being on the face of our version of Earth randomly left. It could, of course, happen (which is what Mystery Dungeon sees on a level and is essentially the entire premise behind Planet of the Apes), but it's something to think about. Why? Because I'm not saying don't have it happen. I'm saying don't have your Pokémon be people in creature costumes. Remember that they probably had to work up to that point, and remember that their technology would be different because it'd take into consideration their natural powers... and, well, body-types. (For example: dogs can't operate guns, so don't have your Growlithe do it.)

2. If you got past that tl;dr bit, keep in mind the nature of humans. Humans are pissants. They'll occupy every single part of the globe if they wanted, and they're the kind of species that aren't easily driven away. Case in point: Australia. Aside from a massive desert occupying most of the continent and an equally massive hole in the ozone layer hovering above it, Australia is home to some of its most poisonous and deadliest flora, fauna, and rocks imaginable. Yet, humankind still decided to colonize it and thrive. If the Australians found out that an island next door is a lot less deadly, they probably wouldn't leave in a giant exodus to that other island. They'd just send a bunch of people to colonize and populate it as well.

In short, the nature of humankind isn't to leave behind what can still be used as hospitable territory. It's to leave it only when they'd die by standing still for five seconds with no protection. And sometimes not even then. (*motions to the research bases in Antarctica*) Likewise for the Pokémon world because we're still talking about humans here. Humans. The species that, in that world, decided it'd be a great idea to send ten-year-olds out into the world to capture mystical beasts in baseball-sized spheres for literally fun and profit. There would have to be something major going on to chase everyone out if they have stable establishments (read: cities, towns) there, and if that happens, chances are, it probably means the rest of the planet is rather uninhabitable, too.

Or, in even shorter terms, if you're going to have a Pokémon-only world, that's fine, but you're going to have to come up with a very good reason why the humans aren't there but the planet isn't a smoldering boulder in space.

3. Pokémon probably wouldn't follow the same habits as mankind. As in, they probably wouldn't know what Sinnoh was, and they probably wouldn't occupy the same human cities. This just folds back into the point about not making Pokémon just humans in animal costumes. Pokémon would need time to develop. Given that humans would probably take their Pokémon wherever they went (unless, of course, you've got a good reason why they're not), we're looking at a bunch of wild Pokémon who have had little to no experience dealing with human beings. They wouldn't, therefore, have much of an understanding of human technology, and no one's going to be explaining to them what they're looking at.

Now, assuming they don't just overrun Snowpoint and destroy it (because that's what nature tends to do with things that aren't maintained by humans), this all just means that they'll developed isolated from human thought. It's like the development of a language. If you don't communicate with each other, you'll end up with different words for the same object. Likewise, Pokémon might break up Sinnoh into different territories, name it differently, group themselves into different kinds of societies (because that's also possible with human beings: civilizations don't necessarily have to live in a city a la New York), all kinds of things.

They might not even establish themselves into the same kinds of territories humans do because not all of them would necessarily behave like humans. (For example, maybe the Bidoof group themselves into nomadic tribes that travel through and don't acknowledge Shinx cities. After all, in the real world, you don't have birds acknowledging that they're living in our territory. As far as they're concerned, they've got no particular borders, so they don't really care. We, meanwhile, don't really wage war against the birds unless we're particularly bored because humans don't really think too much about it. We're different species, so it doesn't really matter to us that these animals' habitats overlap with ours.)


In other words, this is my advice:

1. Get a beta.
2. Don't think of Pokémon as human beings in animal suits. Really think about how they would develop and whatnot.
3. Come up with a really good reason for why there's no humans.
4. Don't be afraid to think about how things work in the real world and compare it to your plot.

And voila. Fic. \o/
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  #6    
Old June 21st, 2010, 02:27 AM
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Originally Posted by JX Valentine View Post
Case in point: Australia. Aside from a massive desert occupying most of the continent and an equally massive hole in the ozone layer hovering above it, Australia is home to some of its most poisonous and deadliest flora, fauna, and rocks imaginable.
I can vouch for that, I'm from Australia and we do have some pretty deadly rocks over here XD

As for advice, I'd go with most of what JX Valentine/Valentine/Jax said, go find yourself a beta reader and figure out what you want to do with this idea. Remember to make everything plausible though - how did the Pokémon suddenly get smarter in 10 years after living alongside humans for centuries (or millenia)? Why did the humans suddenly disappear? Alakazam have unmeasurable intelligence (as an IQ of 5000 is basically impossible as it's more like a ranking of your intelligence compared to that of others, not a measure of how intelligent a person is), why haven't they devised a way to create more advanced machinery and enslave everybody else? Why do the Pokémon all want to fight? Why are they only getting smarter now that the humans have left?

Try and answer a whole lot of these questions when you figure out how you're going to write this. That, and take constructive criticism to heart, because you can only get better by listening to what other people have to say.
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Old June 21st, 2010, 07:38 AM
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Keep in mind the fact that Pokémon are animals in that world.
Well hold your horses there JX Valentine. That's your idea of Fanon, and it's not neccesarily true. My idea of the Pokemon World is that it is essentially our World (Earth) but Japan is replaced by the Places we see ingame. Pokemon live in that "Japanish" area AS WELL as Animals. The difference between the two is that Pokemon can freely switch between Human and Animal emotions and have elemental abilities.

But that's my idea of Fanon. Pick whichever one you want! ^_-

Anyways, sounds like a great idea and I think you should go for it. My 2 pieces of advice though:

1. DESCRIBE!! I have seen way too many fanfics who say "I went to the Lab. I got a Pokemon that was yellow and I beat the Gym a day later." You need to explain as many things as possible and describe like crazy or nobody will read for more than 20 seconds.

2. Use good grammar. That's a problem people overlook way too much. Punctuation and spelling are things you need to use or people will either not understand you or think you're dumb.

Anyways, good luck!

With all regards,

-ChrisTom
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Old June 21st, 2010, 09:31 AM
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Well hold your horses there JX Valentine. That's your idea of Fanon, and it's not neccesarily true.
Actually, I'd hate to say this, but you're sort of missing the point. I never said that Pokémon replace animals. I said that Pokémon are animals. As in, they're treated as animals: animate creatures that aren't on the same level as humans. Of course, the word implies that I'm saying they're considered to be on the same level as real-world animals (although the Pokédex implies it with its tendency to classify certain Pokémon as animals -- such as Pikachu with its designation as the mouse Pokémon), the point is:

1. I never said that they replace animals. In fact, my idea of the Pokémon world is the same as yours. Because that's irrelevant, I'll just leave it at that.
2. Pokémon are not human in mentality. (This is the point I was trying to make to the OP, as you can see by the rest of my post. Hence why it's bolded here.) As in, they're considered to be animals/non-humans by humans and canon evidence (*motions to the numbers of 'dex entries that describe Pokémon hunting in the wild or making nests here or there, et cetera), and they live like animals in the wild. Not to mention the physiology and behavior's completely different. Ergo, they cannot develop societies that mirror humanity exactly, especially in ten years.

So, no, this isn't a bit of fanon we're talking about. What I was trying to say is that the OP shouldn't assume that Pokémon can develop exactly the same way as humans can because wild ones would have very little understanding of human culture and because they would likely develop a society based on the way they naturally behave, technology based on the things they can't do naturally (like how humans developed cars to go faster than they can walk, guns to hunt efficiently, et cetera), and an understanding of each other based on how they view species before becoming smart (like how humans don't really bother chasing birds off their territory and view cows as food). In a non-lengthy sense, the OP should think about Pokémon on an animalistic level because that's how they exist in that world and because that's how humans developed (i.e., mental evolution from our monkey stage). There's not really fanon about it because I don't think you can argue that Pokémon don't live like animals (i.e., hunting and living like the animals they're based on, not living in cities, not using human technology) unless you want to start discussing the various plot holes in Mystery Dungeon. I mean, in every other canon, you can see Houndour hunting in packs, Pidgeotto swooping after bugs, and all that fun stuff that indicates that, yeah, they are animals.

So... yeah. Not fanon.
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Last edited by JX Valentine; June 21st, 2010 at 09:54 AM.
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  #9    
Old June 21st, 2010, 10:21 AM
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Ok, fair enough. My point though was that despite them being "animals" or whatever, they are all intelligent. Maybe not human intelligent, but like really smart dog intelligent. I'm sure you'd agree right?
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Old June 21st, 2010, 10:50 AM
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Ok, fair enough. My point though was that despite them being "animals" or whatever, they are all intelligent. Maybe not human intelligent, but like really smart dog intelligent. I'm sure you'd agree right?
While they are (which is also what I've said in my first post -- *motions to the point about Alakazam*) this doesn't necessarily mean they'll develop into human-like societies. They still live as animals, with very simplistic lives and feral habits. Some are even implied to harbor a fear of humans. (*motions to wild Ralts*) They're not human in behavior, and they have more similarities to our idea of animals in terms of the way they live.

If they develop any further than that, they'll first off need a good reason for doing so and second off need the time to develop based on their own needs. For example, why would Pokémon need guns or other human weaponry when they have their own supernatural powers? Likewise, why would bird Pokémon develop airplanes if most of them can fly? Alternatively, if, for one reason or another (not that I'm recommending it -- see below), you choose to have all Pokémon live in harmony, why wouldn't bird Pokémon simply take up jobs to perform the same functions airplanes would?

Then, beyond technology, you've got to address the way they group themselves naturally. For example, you've got Butterfree, which are nomadic and don't seem to have any particular leader within a flock of them (*motions to the Butterfree flock in "Bye Bye Butterfree"*). Meanwhile, Combee are hive-minded and would probably continue to be hive-minded, with the Vespiquen making all the decisions in the hive. They probably won't have the exact same social structure as humans because humans have this drive to live in permanent settlements structured with a group leader. This is how cities ended up developing: to house the need for humans to have a permanent point in their territory which becomes the focus of their activity.

And, of course, then, you've got the question of whether or not other Pokémon would notice each other. It's a lot like how we view other primates. We might look at a chimpanzee, and although we have a lot of similarities and come from the same branch of the evolutionary tree, we don't see them the way we see other people. Pokémon should be the same way. Although they're all Pokémon, it's doubtful that a Pidgeot would view a Caterpie as its equal, especially if we're talking about descendants of wild Pokémon here. If you write about a war between different species that occupy the same planet, that's one thing you have to keep in mind: whether or not the species would actually view each other as equals. If Pikachu didn't live in the same groups/packs/whatever as Wartortle, why would they after gaining intelligence?

Point is, aside from the fact that you'd need more than ten years to develop a human-level intelligence to begin with, how intelligent they were to begin with becomes a sort of moot point. This is because of the way Pokémon are in what canon considers to be present-day. They have a completely different way of life and completely different physiology, so just because humans aren't around anymore doesn't mean that they'll replace and mimic humans, especially within a short period of time. The point, then, is that one needs to think about how these creatures would develop based on the way they act in the wild and what their physical limitations actually are because they'll most likely not develop the exact same social and technological ideas as humans, despite actually being intelligent.

What I'm trying to get the OP to address is a problem that a lot of rookie sci-fi writers face. Just because you have an intelligent species (be it extraterrestrial or Pokémon) doesn't mean it has to be humanoid in mindset, looks, whatever. Different species develop completely differently based on what they know about/can do with themselves and based on the environment that surrounds them. (Also another reason why there needs to be a good reason for the lack of humans: environment would play a huge factor in how these creatures advance.) They're alien -- not human. They really shouldn't be human, and just because they might be as smart as (or even smarter than, in the cases of numbers of Pokémon species according to the Pokédex) humanity doesn't necessarily mean they can end up with anything like what humans have further down the road.

Actually, if I may recommend a few things for inspiration, try on any of the books in Orson Scott Card's Enderverse. (Speaker for the Dead especially.) These books look like average sci-fi faire on the surface, but underneath, they deal with a lot of issues stemming from the fact that just because you're intelligent or otherwise able to become technologically advanced doesn't necessarily mean you'll behave like humans.

In other words, whether or not they're as intelligent as really smart dogs is still not really the point I was trying to make.
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Last edited by JX Valentine; June 21st, 2010 at 11:02 AM.
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  #11    
Old June 21st, 2010, 02:58 PM
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well this is all good advice but JX dose speak some truth why would flying pokemon need planes well thats just it were talking about transporting as well pokemon from one region to anoughter so planes would be practicle for the pokemon that couldent fly but then about guns for the pokemon well its a stupid idea right now but i was thiniing of it as a bit more of a amplaflier for there powers say for i gave a pokemon like a grovyle one now what he would do is he would take him self a shot a shot be the same as a clip and filling itwith his own power then puting it in a hole on the gun that could then be used to fire out lets say a improved bullet seed this is still some ideas and i am working on charters and more detail on the things they use
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Old June 21st, 2010, 04:37 PM
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Originally Posted by JX Valentine View Post
Actually, if I may recommend a few things for inspiration, try on any of the books in Orson Scott Card's Enderverse. (Speaker for the Dead especially.) These books look like average sci-fi faire on the surface, but underneath, they deal with a lot of issues stemming from the fact that just because you're intelligent or otherwise able to become technologically advanced doesn't necessarily mean you'll behave like humans.
In fact, the first piece of advice Card gives when developing an alien species is to ask the question "How do they differ from humans?"

When writing about an alien species, you got to think about their history, their evolution, their society, and all that jazz. Pokemon as a whole have that, and as individual species.

So I wouldn't doubt that Pokemon aren't intelligent. (I'm a believer that they are.) But they're not humans. They developed differently.

This post just to show my Card nerdiness.
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Old June 21st, 2010, 05:34 PM
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If you're looking for inspiration on this sort of thing, might I suggest checking out the Quintaglio Ascension trilogy by Robert Sawyer? At least the first book is out of print, if not also the other two, but a library might have them. In a nutshell, the series is about dinosaurs that aliens rescued from Earth shortly before their extinction sixty-five million years ago. The aliens put them on another planet to see how they would evolve without the risk of being wiped out. As it happened, the tyrannosaurs (the Quintaglio) did evolve a great deal of intelligence, and eventually civilization. They have social classes, religion, buildings, cities, ships, jobs, astronomers... but at the same time, it's quite clear that they're not just "humans in dinosaur suits", to paraphrase Jax. They don't use chairs but rather rest on long, inclined slabs, because the shape of their bodies doesn't allow them to sit comfortably. They're okay with the use of things like knives as tools, but they see using a knife as a weapon as a cowardly act (what do they need those for when they've got plenty of stabby-slashy things in their mouths and on their hands that they've been instinctively using for ages?). They don't touch one another without permission--no hugs, no handshakes, etc.--because their old instincts as territorial predators are still there, and uninvited physical contact triggers an attack response from the Quintaglio who was touched. Those are just a few examples of the sorts of things you can try.
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Old June 22nd, 2010, 11:07 PM
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Originally Posted by dempsey View Post
well this is all good advice but JX dose speak some truth why would flying pokemon need planes well thats just it were talking about transporting as well pokemon from one region to anoughter so planes would be practicle for the pokemon that couldent fly but then about guns for the pokemon well its a stupid idea right now but i was thiniing of it as a bit more of a amplaflier for there powers say for i gave a pokemon like a grovyle one now what he would do is he would take him self a shot a shot be the same as a clip and filling itwith his own power then puting it in a hole on the gun that could then be used to fire out lets say a improved bullet seed this is still some ideas and i am working on charters and more detail on the things they use
what was that i can't even read it wat wat wat

Like said before, you still have to have reasons why the Pokémon are even using the technology in the first place. Pokémon aren't humans. Some might be like us, but they aren't exactly us. Some won't even be able to use the technology (Like your Grovyle example - they don't have opposable thumbs) and others won't need it. You're can either ditch human technology or figure out a damn good reason that the Pokémon are using it.
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Old June 23rd, 2010, 03:26 AM
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I had this idea for an RP that I may also write as a fanfic. There's a few issues to work out, but here's a rough idea:

A scientist is trying to recreate the Pokerus Virus to make Pokemon even stronger, and sell it publicly.
He seemingly succeeds, testing it on various Pokemon and getting the exact same beneficts from the original Pokerus.
The Pokerus is made public and for a while, all is fine. However, roughly 8-12 years after being infected with the new Pokerus, the Pokemon die. The Virus' quick and aggressive spread made it impossible to contain and all Pokemon were killed within 30 years.

Over 300 years later, humans are suddenly finding themselves using techniques Pokemon once used. An institute is set up at the old location of Indigo Plateua (?) and the humans (dubbed 'PokeSpirits') are researched.

However, it turns out that the institute is a front to brainwash and enslave PokeSpirits as well as research, and will be used as weapons to take over the world. The PokeSpirits not recorded and found are in hiding from the Institute, still trying to come to terms with their abilities and figure out some answers to the 'PokeSpirit' inside them.
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Old June 23rd, 2010, 06:31 AM
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I want to write a Touhou fanfic, involving the Scarlet Devil Mansion. Due to the fact that I am unaware of any detailed canon backstory for most of the characters (besides the very bare-bones details), I've decided to take what little information I have on their past and adapt it into full stories.

I wanted to do a few chapters for each of them, in the order I want them to appear.
Here are a few ideas:

-The Scarlet "Sisters"-

Remilia will arrive in Gensokyo, filthy rich and fairly powerful. She will soon realize that open conflict with humans will drive her food source to extinction, so she instead builds a house out in the woods (Complete with everything needed to live in luxury), and reigns in a few fairies.

Flandre's addition will come to me later...

-Hong Meirin-
China is a wandering youkai from... China. She stumbles across Gensokyo and the Scarlet Devil Mansion, and challenges Remilia to a fight. She loses spectacularly, but Remilia, impressed with her ability, allows her to become a gatekeeper.

-Patchouli Knowledge-
Patchouli Knowledge, a youkai magician from the Human Village, arrives at the Scarlet Devil Mansion seeking refuge from the humans. Remilia decides it would be a good idea to have somebody who can run things. She accepts, and Patchouli begins building up her library.

When she arrives at the mansion, she gets beaten to a bloody pulp by Hong Meirin, starting the enmity between the two.

-Sakuya Izayoi-
Sakuya wakes up in Fuyuki Hakurei's shrine, remembering only her orders to assassinate Remilia Scarlet, her abilities, and information about Gensokyo. She makes a beeline for the Mansion, and, after an epic fight with Remilia, is drafted into the vampire's service. Remilia gives her the name "Sakuya Izayoi."

I'm also thinking of including a few scenes of Sakuya in the Human Village, if only to demonstrate the cold(er) person Sakuya initially was.



Ehhh... what do y'all think?
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Old June 23rd, 2010, 07:49 AM
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I think it sounds interesting. Can't suggest much since I know nothing about Touhou, though.
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Old June 23rd, 2010, 08:32 AM
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Shanghai Alice: Sorry I can't offer any advice to yours. I've never touched The Touhou Project, so I really can't say anything without possibly pointing out something that's actually just a canon thing. (For example, I have no idea what some of your terminology refers to, and it sounds like your bunny would be a lot more interesting if I did.) All I can say is I'm not sure how popular the games are, so I'm equally uncertain as to how much of an audience you'll attract on a Pokémon forum.

That being said...

Quote:
Originally Posted by Roxasabridged View Post
A scientist is trying to recreate the Pokerus Virus to make Pokemon even stronger, and sell it publicly.
He seemingly succeeds, testing it on various Pokemon and getting the exact same beneficts from the original Pokerus.
The Pokerus is made public and for a while, all is fine. However, roughly 8-12 years after being infected with the new Pokerus, the Pokemon die. The Virus' quick and aggressive spread made it impossible to contain and all Pokemon were killed within 30 years.
While it's interesting to have a Pokémon-focused epidemic wipe out the Pokémon population, you'll want to think of a couple of things:

1. Eight to ten years' incubation time isn't really a "quick and aggressive" spread of a virus. This is assuming you didn't mean it mutated in eight to ten years (i.e., assuming that you meant that each Pokémon died within eight to ten years after receiving the Pokérus virus). For a comparison, try looking up the Black Death, which killed roughly a third of Europe's population within two years. The course of the disease (at least, from the time of contraction to the time of death) was only about a week, and this was bacterial-based. Viruses like the flu can be up to half that time. Of course, a virus can have any variety of symptoms (which in turn could mean it could detected at any length of time -- including, in some cases, not at all), but if you want your virus to be a deadly epidemic, it always helps to do some research into historical epidemics to figure out how to make yours a bit more believable.

2. Also, think about how this virus is transmitted. If it was given to trainers only via injection, unless it mutated into a more contagious form fairly quickly, wild Pokémon probably went untouched unless this concentrated 'rus displays the same behavior as Pokérus itself (i.e., contagious through skin-to-skin contact).

3. Ecology. Pokémon represent a huge part of the ecology of that world, with some (legendaries) even being embodiments of nature itself. If you wipe out several hundred species all at once, you're risking throwing the balance of nature off, which would no doubt result in horrific things happening to the environment and to humanity itself. Be careful.

4. Remember that this is a virus, one that (in the present of the games, at least) isn't well researched to begin with. You'll have to ask the question of how many people would be willing to infect their Pokémon with a virus -- and, of course, whether or not this is a moot point, considering point #2.

In other words, viruses aren't bad for a concept, but I'm just saying put a lot of thought into it. You could potentially come out with something interesting (like a post-apocalyptic hell); it just depends on how you handle the virus.

As for the rest of the concept, I can't say too much that you'll probably answer within your fic as it is. For example, did the humans magically get these abilities, or is it a new step in human evolution? (This would classify your fic as either a fantasy or a sci-fi piece.) Considering the human race has been living without Pokémon for roughly three centuries, would the Institute have the technology to take over the world without the PokéSpirits? (This question would mean that the army would actually be pretty pointless. As in, the human race would have moved away from depending on Pokémon powers and towards relying on technological weaponry, which in three centuries could have advanced to the point where an untrained piece of flesh would be laughed at by a robot with a nice gun. In other words, who would the Institute be fighting against, and would it be worth it to them to capture and enslave mutants as opposed to building bigger robots and either eradicating the mutants -- if they thought the Spirits would pose a remote threat to said robots -- or just ignoring them?)

On that note, I don't know. There's a lot of fics/RPs out there that entail "I have a special group of people with special powers, and there's someone out there who wants to use these people to take over the world." This is actually part of the reason why I'm telling you to think about these questions and concepts and figure out where things might need to be tweaked. It's an interesting idea on the surface, but if you don't ask these kinds of things, you may run into problems with cliché or WTFery.

Good luck, though.
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  #19    
Old June 23rd, 2010, 09:40 AM
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Ahh, that actually is a good point.

I upload most of them to another website, anyway.

I was just wondering if any of them sounded cliche on the surface.

Thanks for the feedback!
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Old June 23rd, 2010, 02:23 PM
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I've currently been mulling over a fanfic that's been building up for quite a while now. Any help would be appreciated.

The main story is set in Hoenn, but spreads and overlaps onto Sinnoh aswell.

Team Magma and Aqua are at war. Hostilities have been rising for quite a while now, and after a certain incident * cough* spoiler *cough*, it erupts into an all out war. Ordinary civilians are forced to pick a side as the battle swells and rages on. This isn't just your average gang turf war, this is two armies consisting of millions fighting for the greater good, the main caualties - pokemon. However, the main character, is stuck in the middle, torn by revenge, undecided which side to take, if any.

i know this sounds quite confusing, but im looking for a beta reader over the next couple of weeks, who will become much more enlightened by the events and the cogs of the story

Thankyou, and feel free to criticize/comment as you please
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Old June 23rd, 2010, 05:03 PM
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I'm wondering, what role does the main character play? Is he just there to narrate events? Does he determine the outcome of the war? Is the revenge bit relevant?

Frankly, I can't imagine how Team Aqua and Team Magma could start a full-scale war. Each team is a criminal organization with goals that are supposedly benevolent but, in the final analysis, kind of absurd. What would make me, an ordinary civilian, take up arms and join their cause?
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Old June 23rd, 2010, 09:38 PM
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I'm also confused as to why everyone is fighting in the war. I know it seems more epic to include everyone and their Growlithe in wars, but there's still a need for the common everyday person to do their job, even in wartime. Soldiers need weapons, everyone needs food. And heck, medical care is needed if people/Pokemon are fighting.

And as Rabbit said, why would people join the cause? What would make someone think "Oh, we definitely need way more water to live!"

If you're looking for a beta reader, there's a thread stickied in this forum just for that purpose.
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Old June 24th, 2010, 11:19 AM
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You're forgetting the fact that the Pokemon are probably the weapons. But everything else still holds.

People don't join war for the sake of war. Propaganda, occupation, threats, incentives... All of that plays a factor. And you also have the anti-war folks, and the neutral folks.

Everyone needs a motive.

For an easy way out, remember some people simply enjoy killing. That's how my protagonist got supporters. You find a warlord who likes breaking things, and convince them to join. They bring their vassals/servants. Hooray!
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Old June 24th, 2010, 11:51 AM
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Ok guys, I have a couple ideas to run by you:

1. A small island town is about to experience a hurricane. A Pikachu who get's lost from her family befriends a trainer who decides to seek shelter at the local Lighthouse. Upon entering they discover an ancient secret, having to do with Lanturn, Relicanth, and the birth of the ocean...

2. Okay, my main question with this is should it be a story or an RP? I can't really decide. The town of Cinnabar Island is struck with fear. There have been sightings. Sightings of something so strange, so otherworldly, so terrifying that it peirces their hearts with fear at the mere name of it. Some say it's nothing more than mass hysteria. But after one boy's father get's killed by it, he knows he'll have to unravel the secret of: The Cinnabar Anomaly. Yes, I stole the name from the fanon Pokedex, don't judge me.

Please tell me what you guys think! Feel free to critiscise as you please. I am excited to hear any and all thoughts you wish to say!

With all regards,

-ChrisTom
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Old June 24th, 2010, 12:00 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Shanghai Alice View Post
You're forgetting the fact that the Pokemon are probably the weapons.
There have been canon instances of war where the humans fought, either against or with Pokemon. Trainers might fight one another while their Pokemon are fighting, or there just might be Pokemon-less humans who want to fight.

Besides, take a look at pictures from any war in the Pokemon world. Humans and Pokemon are wearing armor, and you need someone still to make and repair that. Same with medicine and food. If just the Pokemon are fighting, then there's still Centers that should be kept running, medicine that should still be produced for quick healing, and food that should be produced.

Which is all that I was thinking of when I said that not everyone can actually be fighting.

ChrisTom posted while I did, so that's why I didn't respond to him. That, and I need to go soon.
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