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  #1    
Old October 17th, 2010 (07:04 AM).
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all i'm thinking is:
OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG!!!

I had this really great awesome pokemon story called: Flying Girl Rainbow Wing, for like, 5 years.

And yes, it's a Magical Girl Pokemon story.
Thats why i wanted to ask if it is a good idea.
I'll just give you some information about the story:

Spoiler:
all Legendary pokemon have human forms OMG!

This is a fan sequel to BOTH the pokemon anime and MANGA :D

This is 3 years after ash became champion (so characters are all 3 years older)

Girls with awesome magical powers to transform
Kako/RainbowWing:Ho-oh
Kasumi/FrostWing: Articuno
Haruka/BlueWing: Manaphy
Hikari/GraceWing: Shaymin
***Iris/VictoryWing: Victini
**Blue/ThunderWing: Zapdos

Guys
Satoshi
Shuu
Shigeru
**Red
**Silver
**Emerald
**Green
N

** Characters from Manga
***NOTE: because Iris is new to the anime, i hadn't figured out a good pokemon for her, so for now, Vicitni is her power

Shipping is involved in this storeh (including legendary pokemon shippings cause they have human forms )
Including two new ones i call:
Ho-ohShipping: Ash and Kako
RoyalShipping: N and Kako


I can understand why people won't like it, so i don't mind criticism and bad comments.
Thank you for your help! (or not xD)
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Old October 17th, 2010 (09:16 AM).
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You're going to have to work on how to combine both the anime and the manga together, since they are different canons, and therefore different worlds with different rules. So to see characters from one world combined with those from another is kind of jarring.

I'm also wondering if you've seen enough of Best Wishes or played enough of Black/White to get a good handle on Iris's and N's characterization. They're brand-new characters from games that are barely out in Japan. So unless you know their characters, I wouldn't really recommend writing about them.

You should also be aware that these characters might come out as Mary Sues because of the plot of the story. I mean, you have humans that are able to turn into Pokemon with the powers of gods. It's going to take a lot of care to make sure that these characters are actually believable, since you're writing in a world where people don't commonly have those powers. To suddenly have them without any explanation in whichever world you're writing in might turn away readers. (Especially since Pokemon, either anime or manga with the exception of one, doesn't fit the magical girl genre.)

There's also just the matter that you have two characters who really aren't written for shipping being used in romance fics. For instance, Ash is ten in the anime now, and in your story he's thirteen. He still wouldn't really be the character to go for romance because of just how important Pokemon are to him. So you have to be careful with that. It's the same for N, since his characterization has him pretty much hating all humans and not wanting to know them.

Maybe you actually do have all of these problems that I saw figured out and can actually execute them in the story itself. Since all that you have posted now is the bare minimum of what and who the story's about.
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Old October 17th, 2010 (10:10 AM). Edited October 17th, 2010 by RainbowWing.
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Quote originally posted by Astinus:
You're going to have to work on how to combine both the anime and the manga together, since they are different canons, and therefore different worlds with different rules. So to see characters from one world combined with those from another is kind of jarring.

I'm also wondering if you've seen enough of Best Wishes or played enough of Black/White to get a good handle on Iris's and N's characterization. They're brand-new characters from games that are barely out in Japan. So unless you know their characters, I wouldn't really recommend writing about them.

You should also be aware that these characters might come out as Mary Sues because of the plot of the story. I mean, you have humans that are able to turn into Pokemon with the powers of gods. It's going to take a lot of care to make sure that these characters are actually believable, since you're writing in a world where people don't commonly have those powers. To suddenly have them without any explanation in whichever world you're writing in might turn away readers. (Especially since Pokemon, either anime or manga with the exception of one, doesn't fit the magical girl genre.)

There's also just the matter that you have two characters who really aren't written for shipping being used in romance fics. For instance, Ash is ten in the anime now, and in your story he's thirteen. He still wouldn't really be the character to go for romance because of just how important Pokemon are to him. So you have to be careful with that. It's the same for N, since his characterization has him pretty much hating all humans and not wanting to know them.

Maybe you actually do have all of these problems that I saw figured out and can actually execute them in the story itself. Since all that you have posted now is the bare minimum of what and who the story's about.
You are right about a lot of stuff,but i did mention how i had this idea for 5 years, and it did went though a lot of changes. Also, i didn't mention the PLOT, mostly because i don't want to spoil every single thing.Another reason why i didn't want to do this story in the first place is because since it's a sequel to the pokemon anime/manga, theres a lot of detail. thats why i didn't want to add the manga in the story in the first place because of how a lot of people never read the manga,and theres an arc of the story that has to do with the Origin of Mewtwo thing that was never shown in public, resulting in a lot of questions. >.<
I know it's childish to quote a bad comment when i said i don't mind them, i just wanted to point out that i didn't tell you the plot... or plots, since there 4 story arcs :3
[EDIT] I have the feeling your thinking i just thought the idea popped into my head and then i wrote this, but i had this idea for along time, like i said, 5 years, i memorized the first chapter and the very last chapter completely though my head .
I tied in the manga too

Okay for now on, just say if it's good or bad,nothing else.
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  #4    
Old October 17th, 2010 (10:54 AM). Edited October 17th, 2010 by JX Valentine.
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Quote originally posted by RainbowWing:
i just wanted to point out that i didn't tell you the plot... or plots, since there 4 story arcs :3
Astinus was warning you about characterization mainly, which is actually valid advice regardless of what the plot actually is.

Also, ze also said that you probably thought of half of zir advice already, which implies that, yes, ze read the part where you said you came up with this idea five years ago. Still, just because you said you came up with the story five years ago doesn't necessarily mean you already know:

1. What a Mary Sue is.
2. Why you shouldn't use brand-new canon until enough information is revealed about them (e.g., it's not recommended that you use Iris because there's not much information about what her character is like).
3. Why mixing canon isn't a good idea unless you know what you're doing. This isn't just because people might not know what went on in the anime if they're manga fans and vice versa. It's also because the manga and anime are completely different in tone, completely different in basics (like how certain moves work), and completely different in backstories (like how the entire plot involving the Mask of Ice -- which really defined who Blue and Silver became as characters -- never happened in the anime). This is, in general, why I think having this be a sequel for both the anime and the Special manga won't fly -- because they have completely incompatible storylines. Or, in other words, stuff that happened in the anime didn't happen in the manga and vice versa. You'll have trouble finding places where the two can coincide without blowing off important plot points of one or the other.

These are points that you learn from interacting in writing communities and generally getting feedback like Asty's from more experienced writers. For example, a Mary Sue is extremely hard to define, and most people who start out in writing communities (and a lot of people who are still on places like Fanfiction.net) don't know what those are because it's a fandom term. Likewise, a lot of people think that using stuff from new generations is a great idea, but people don't know that until the games have been out for awhile and until the usual sites have pretty much everything to know up, what you think might be true in canon might not actually be true. (For example, you could say that anime!Iris has a Crimgan and an Ononokus because she does in the games, but what if the anime says in next week's episode that Kibago really is her only Pokémon for fairly important plot reasons? Or, for a better example, what if you say that N is this overzealous extremist hypocrite who captures all his Pokémon, only to find out once you get the games that N actually just befriends local Pokémon and gets them to fight for him? Sure, like Asty said, there's a chance you've already done your homework about this, but if you haven't, the point is you just don't know these kinds of things until information like this is more readily available.)

And the larger point? You don't really know these kinds of tips unless you talk to a lot of fandom authors because the more experienced folk are your best teachers. How long ago you started planning gives us a baseline idea of how much thought you put into the plot, but we're giving you advice about the details and how to execute your ideas. It's like saying that we know you understand the basics of cooking, but we want to teach you how to use different spices properly. It's just two different things.

And I'm sorry if I seem confrontational, but yes. It's understood that you've been planning this for awhile, but Asty isn't actually saying that ze thinks you just came up with it on the spot. Asty was just saying that there's certain details in this whole shebang that might not work (even if you've thought that they will for the past five years), so you'll want to be careful about using them. This stems from the fact that you say you're going to use them, not from how long ago you decided you wanted to use them, if that makes sense.

As for my own opinion, I honestly can't judge whether or not this concept will work because, as Asty has said, you've given us a bare-bones idea. Whether or not every plot is a good or bad idea depends completely on what you do with it. You could have a really awesome magical girl idea that you describe to us in as bare-bones a description as possible, but it could fall flat in the execution if the characterization's weak, if your plot is full of holes, that sort of thing. On the other hand, it could potentially live up to what you say it will be. If you offered a brief summary of the plot itself (like the summaries these people give), it might be slightly easier to figure out the general direction in which this is going, but other than that, you could either be very generic about this (basically a lot like Sailor Moon, only with Pokémon) or blow off magical girl conventions completely in new and interesting ways (examples for your convenience: 1 2 3). I just can't say. *shrug*
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  #5    
Old October 23rd, 2010 (08:22 AM).
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Meh... It's ok. I wish it had a more "Super Sentai/Power Rangers" feel, though.
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Old October 29th, 2010 (05:49 AM).
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Hmm, I think if you gave it a more mature adult theme (No, Not sexually theme just like, Not for a very young crowd) It would work!
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Old November 12th, 2010 (05:13 PM).
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...Gah, looks like I've been stealing someone's idea after all. /planning a fic in the vein of Sailor Moon since this summer. Anyway, yeah, I can't add much past what Astinus and Jax pointed out; the more you familiarize yourself with the ways the canon works, the more you will have to work with when you start your story. Also, I'd hold off on working on it until we at least get Pokémon Black and White released in English, so you have one basis to go off of - usually the anime is good at sticking to the game characterizations. Either that or ditch the Isshu dudes entirely.
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Old November 16th, 2010 (03:02 AM).
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I think you should not have anime characters turning into the Pokemon, but the Legendary Pokemon turning into completely new characters!
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Old November 16th, 2010 (06:40 AM).
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Guys, I'd just like to say one thing about adding suggestions about an author's idea. You're definitely free to do it because no one's stopping you, but instead of saying, "I really wish you (insert something that would change the basic plot/be its own plot bunny here)," you've really got to point out why it would fit into the original idea better than what's already there. For example, this is a magical girl fic. Why would a Super Sentai (a completely different genre) feel be better for it? Likewise, why would having the legendaries turn into original characters be better than anime ones? (The last one's a bit of a wallbanger in itself, if you don't mind me saying so, because it'd agree with what Giratina, Asty, and I have been saying, depending on your what your reason was for saying that.)

Or, in other words, seriously, if you're just trying to add elements to the plot because you think it'd be cool, it might be better to develop that into your own plot bunny. If, however, you honestly think it'd be an improvement to what RainbowWing (who, I should add, hasn't even been active in this forum for a couple of weeks) already has for her fic, you really should add a bit more detail to your posts to give her more ideas on how she might use what you're trying to get her to think about.

Not trying to be *****y or anything. I just want to see writers who post in this forum get the most help they can possibly receive, just because that's what they come in this particular part of PC to do.
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