[Let's Play] Vietnamese Pokémon Crystal

[Team Fail]

If you cannot view any images, try http://anonymousipsoftware.info/brow...&b=0&f=norefer.
Ok. Let me introduce me to this in a formal way. At least I hope it's going to be formal.

We were talking about bootleg games on the IRC here at PC, and I mentioned Pokemon Gold on the NES. I was told of this Vietnamese Pokemon Crystal, and after a few videos, I nearly died laughing. I hope you do, too, although I'm not the funniest guy. Shall we begin?

Table of Contents

Ep. 1. A New Adventure Awaits! (This post)
Ep. 2. I Choose You! No! Not Drugs! You! (LINK)
Ep. 3. To the Elf Grandfather and Beyond! (LINK)
Ep. 4. Beat the Mystery Kid! Return to the Lab!(LINK)
Ep. 5. Guixiang City and the Puzzling Puzzles! (LINK)
Ep. 6. Guixiang City! Facing Gymnasium Curator Heyaduo! (LINK)

A New Adventure Awaits!

Spoiler:

Let's begin as close to the start as we can, shall we?

It looks rather like the Pokemon Crystal I got from the store. It don't look foreign to me.


I take that back.


I'd better change... What is this?


Boy? Gir? Sounds familiar...

Thought so. I WANNA BE GIR! I WANNA BE GIR!


So, I live in a world of Elves? Are they Santa's elves?


This doesn't seem correct. I never knew time had letters in it.


Yes, you are bad. You'd better get your sorry butt to the lab or this game will never fly!


You are demanding me to go to the Elves' Land? I thought I was there already.


And then you welcome me? Are you high?


/me hides.


They exist everywhere.......? Ok. I think I get it, but how are these elves also monsters?


There are secrets in the riddles and you do research... I never knew there was a science behind riddles.


At least this makes sense. But the names don't.


This will stand out against all the Engrish.


Do I get ready? You have to get to the lab! YOU get ready!


We are going to a land of Monsters? I hope I will live. Are they violent? Start? None of this makes sense. Explain it again.


Where is the Christmas music? There are elves... And no Christmas music. WTF.


HAHAHA HIS NAME IS WALNUT LOL.


What have I done to the power supply? Did I ruin it? Oops.


It's prohibiting me from taking out things. I hate PCs for that reason.


What a descriptive name, eh? Let's go downstairs.


What am I supposed to memorize? Everything that high, sleepy professor said to me? I hope I don't have to.


I have Elf gear? Am I in a hiring position to be one of Santa's elves? SIGN ME UP!


You know what? That I'll get the job? Job get!


I get elf gear. Where is the nametag with my amazing name?


So, this Xiuchi thing is my coach? I don't like that name. It sounds like a scam artist. Maybe I should tell Santa he's on the Naughty list.


The day of the week is not set, but you set it before I got it? Are you high too?


So, I have to insert a pin and select a holy icon? Is this pin my key to getting my job with Santa?


So it can add random people to my phone? Eew. There are stalkers out there, you know? I'll have to report them to Santa.


YOU WANT THESE CREEPOS TO STALK ME? eew


One. And only one monster. It had better not be Santa. Santa is no monster.


The amazingly epic bag.


There is a central house of elf reports? Where is this? I want to give mine steroids!


We are writing the report, then I save the report? I don't think I need assistance if there is a central house of bookkeeping.


I have no idea what to say. This is just fail.


There are elf experts? It must be Santa.


There is a world-class school RIGHT NEXT TO MY HOUSE!?!?! My kids are going there. After I leave all my elf homies. Hey... I wasn't stalking you. It seems everyone is high today. Must be just me.


Ohhhhh.... That's the name of that doohickey mom gave me. It is what has the phone she was mentioning. I think I get it.


I'm going to the North Pole. I do have a job there, you know.


So, these monsters will fly off from caocuns and attack me? Maybe that snazzy school over there could help me.

Up next: Episode 2: I Choose You! No! Not Drugs! You!

[vudw]

And so it begins! I'm dying right now, I really am. :'D
I have to play this for myself sometime, but I doubt I'll get to it.
/stalks

[Went]

Man I'm laughing like there's no tomorrow XD

All hail bootleg games.

[Bluerang1]

Lolwut? O_o Is this game real? Hahaha!

[mew_nani]

Elves? Elves?! Since when were Pokemon elves?!

Seriously, what the heck were the translators doing when they translated this? Its just plain insanity. :D

[Yuoaman]

Oh god, she's a beverage, you might want to watch out, you never know what'll happen in this strange land of nonsense.

[Team Fail]

Originally Posted by Kuribute123

TOTODILE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

That's my plan, knowing what the correct translation of this game has offered me...

Originally Posted by Yuoaman

[IMG]http://img832.imageshack.us/img832/9127/pokemoncrystalvietnam53.png[/URL]
Oh god, she's a beverage, you might want to watch out, you never know what'll happen in this strange land of nonsense.

I Never thought of that. (and fix the tag lol)

-----------

Episode 2- I Choose You! No! Not Drugs! You!

Spoiler:

Ok. We're outside of the World-Class school now. Let's visit it and see if that lady will let me go to the North Pole to start my Dream Job.


You know me? And you're waiting for me. I AM STANDING RIGHT IN FRONT OF YOU!


You are making research into one elf? That's rather useless as it seems that there are many different kinds like Pikaqiu.


It will be known for a long time? Sounds better than working for Santa. I want to hear moar.


I Need to take care of an elf? Are Santa's elves put into labor in this world? Nooooooooooooooooo...

*sob*

Tell Santa I'm quitting.

And as for taking care of this elf, NO.


You keep giving me the same option, yet it's not an issue. I guess I have no choice but to say yes.


There are fans of elf slavery? Eew.

*Wusiji Dr. gets a message*


There is a grandfather elf? How old is he?


You know he has a big discovery, but you're busy and shy and you want a kid that you don't even know that well to go see the Elf Grandfather. You are messed up.


YOU WANT ME TO BREED ELVES. I'm not watching this. I want to go get that important discovery from the Grandfather elf. AND I AM NOT A DUDE, OK.

Wait a minute. I'm not a dude, I'm a chick. I thought I chose Gir... Remember...

I hate you all.


Whatever.


Nah. It might kill me if it gets mad at me.


I don't want it to eat me alive. kthxbai


A grass elf? Sounds snazzy.


I'll pick this one. My Crock senses are tingling.


NO.


Thanks for the directions. I don't intend on returning, anyways.


The instructions, yes. This game, that is another story.


Damn you. I don't intend on returning. I don't want it.


Whatever. I won't use it anyways.


Ok. But remember, I'M NOT R-E-T-U-R-N-I-N-G. GET IT? GOT IT? GOOD.


I request myself. Eew.


WHAT IS THIS? I DON'T DO DRUGS! Maybe they were using it earlier and shared some of it with my mother.


What is this? I thought this was an innocent game. I am scarred for life.

NOTE: From here on out in the game, any item that I get will have that text, replacing DRUGS with the item that is obtained.


After some exploration...

This must be what happens when elves fly out of their caocuns. Let's scare them away with Croc. YAY CROC!


Apparently, Croc never scared Lap away, so I had to escape perfectly. Nothing less than perfection is required for an escape, it seems.


I found some more drugs. Maybe Wusiji Dr. has drugs hidden all over the place. Hmm...


I'm sure it is. Nothing happened, yet.


It will fight to be unsick. Ok. Cool beans.


Well, steering clear of caocuns is hard, they are everywhere.


How long will this take? Ah, screw it.


Ooh... I hope there is apples on it...


Well, This doesn't seem like an apple... Hey! Quit humping the bag! We have an adventure to complete!


These town names seem cool. Let us continue to Jiye City, then.


And we end our adventure here for today.

Next episode: Episode 3- To the Elf Grandfather and Beyond!

[bobandbill]

Nice LP thus far - the English ones always amuse have to say as mentioned on the chat. XD Very amused by the Prof. Elf Aide giving you a DRUG of all things.

Good luck with all them elves, and with the LP too. =p

[mew_nani]

DRUGS?

....That explains a lot. :\ No wonder the people are so weird....

'Tis funny. Nice job. :D

[Team Fail]

Originally Posted by mew_nani

DRUGS?

....That explains a lot. :\ No wonder the people are so weird....

'Tis funny. Nice job. :D

Oh good. I was worried it was not funny.

When I saw this on the video on YouTube, I almost died.

[BlooMilk C.]

I almost died laughing. I fell out of my chair and started rolling(ROFL?). This is a really good LP, and it's also really hilarious. Good luck dealing will those elves :/

[Logiedan]

I just died laughing. I don't even..
Drug GET!

[Team Fail]

Originally Posted by Logiedan

I just died laughing. I don't even..
Drug GET!

I just thought of the exact same thing.

[Team Fail]

Episode 3- To the Elf Grandfather and Beyond!

Spoiler:

Ok. We are in Jiye City. Let's explore a little and see what this place has to offer!


This makes sense. It sets a theme. I like it.


This place will be useful. I hope there are more places like this one.


I'm among friends... I feel loved.


Is he an elf? It doesn't say elf, so I assume he is not.


I don't have a streetmap. Do you have one I can steal borrow from you?


What are these words you are spiking of? I dun't understund you.


DON'T DO IT!!!!


I'll see what you have.


Ignoring the drugs...
Renew poisoning? No thank you.


You... Just... Helped... Go away.


I'm on my beginning too! You think just like me! Is that a bad thing?


It depends. Ok, whatever.


It says PC on it. I wonder what that means? And that ball thing... What is that?


No wonder I was among friends there. :D


I grasp monsters in basins, or do I grasp elves? I am so damn confused.


Handaolu sounds nice.


Awwwww... They play games? That sounds really nice. This will be a breeze.


THIS IS THE SEA, AS YOU CAN SEE, DAMMIT!

Wait... Where is the monster?


Are we there yet?


OOOH A PRESENT!!! YAY! IT'S CHRISTMAS! WOOOOOOOO!!!!!!


lame.


What? Well, moving on...


...to R30...


Common sense tells me I was just at Jiye City. This road must lead me to Guixiang City.


No, I never knew that. Fascinating.


It becomes health? A ball of pure health? Cool. I can be illness-free. :D


Just quit while you're ahead of yourself.


Some nice treasure hunting... I am successful. ITEMS GET!


Was I asking?


The only house behind me is that man's house that tells me about the pure health monster. You're a liar.


Sounds trendy. How do I do it?


I CAN'T. YOU'RE TAKING UP ALL THE ROAD!!!


This place must be it. Ooh pretty tree. Shiny


That makes sense. Is it an apple? A perfect apple?


Let's not go there, ok?


Yes, I am. Wusiji Dr. introduced me to you earlier.


I told him I'm not returning. He can go and do this himself.


Thing? I hope I don't know what this thing is.


I'll cook it later for supper. kthxbai


OMG THERE ARE PEOPLE IN THIS EGG? I AM NO CANNIBAL!


Mail? Ha. That's old-tech. We have e-mail now. Looser. Pfft


He accepts evolution? You do that.


You have dreams? Dream on...


Yes, I am. Why do I have to introduce myself so many times? Jeez...


Why hello Oujide. You are studying the monster? There are many of them, ya know? Duhrr...


Why? Because I know that there is more than one kind of monster, and that I can take care of the scarce monster that Wusiji Dr. gave me? Damn rights.


Yes, you accept the fact that I know more about monsters than you.


YOU ARE THE SAME PERSON!!?!?!? Why did you hire me? Well, let's see what you want to request me.


It's an automatic book? COOL.


YUSS.


I think MS word will detect a sentence fragment. Let's see. Surprisingly, no! It's de-engrishing!


It seems like you forget things by a mile.


You just admitted it. +1 internets for me!


Have fun making radio programs! Nice meeting you, weird person!


Quit requesting me and just leave. I'll give you some drugs to hold you off.


Here is the bag. "DERP!DROP DRUGS BAG F***"


As if.


I'm not answering. I told you I'm not returning.


Well, I can make ONE EXCEPTION if I must.


And here is where we leave off the adventures of Derp. What is going to happen next? Find out soon!

Episode 4- Beat the Mystery Kid! Return to the Lab!

[vudw]

I want to play games with the monsters!~

I think it's apparent Sunston is an Oran berry as well. :U

[Team Fail]

Originally Posted by vudw

I want to play games with the monsters!~

I think it's apparent Sunston is an Oran berry as well. :U

I think so too. But, let's stick to Engrish originality. :x

I won't have time for the next few days for an update with School 'n all. Go ahead and discuss what's happened so far :)

[vudw]

Going through this game, with what I've seen so far, first and foremost seems like it would be trolling anyone who has an OCD for proper language use and grammar and the like. (It's hilarious!) That's obviously the first thing anyone really notices, apart from the start up of the game. xD

It's nice to see that the player character is taking a role in helping out weird, and slightly retarded professors. I'm sure she doesn't talk just because the situations and conversations are just so damn STRANGE. Really, I can't think of any other way to put it than that.

Also, Ms. Derp, stop bumping the bag. People might notice and avoid you like an outcast.
... or is that the goal? :U

[Akeraz]

I am kind of dissapointed you didn't examine the oven in your house.
It's one of my favourite lines in this translation :3.

[Team Fail]

Originally Posted by Akeraz

I am kind of dissapointed you didn't examine the oven in your house.
It's one of my favourite lines in this translation :3.

Oh is it? Well, when I return back home to Wusiji Dr., I'll be sure to see to that.

[jynx]

I had a good laugh at those ENGRISH XDDDD

For those "DRUG" issues. I think it's because in Japanese, it's called "Medicine", and they kind of simplified it to "DRUG".
They aren't called "potions" in japanese.
See Bulbapedia.

Originally Posted by mew_nani

Elves? Elves?! Since when were Pokemon elves?!

Seriously, what the heck were the translators doing when they translated this? Its just plain insanity. :D

In case you don't know, the Cantonese name for Pokemon has always been "Little Pet Elves" since generation 1.

[Team Fail]

Originally Posted by jynx

I had a good laugh at those ENGRISH XDDDD

For those "DRUG" issues. I think it's because in Japanese, it's called "Medicine", and they kind of simplified it to "DRUG".
They aren't called "potions" in japanese.
See Bulbapedia.



In case you don't know, the Cantonese name for Pokemon has always been "Little Pet Elves" since generation 1.

It's all still quite funny, though. I am hoping for an update within a few days.

[Zayin]

I died laughing when I watched the youtube vids (here's the link, the animators are pretty funny).

.

This is so hilarious. The oven line is pretty epic indeed, it says "Volcano bakemeat" xD. One of my favourites lines was "Huge ball bag f**k". Or something like that xD.

[Team Fail]

Ok... The long-awaited episode is FINALLY here! yay

Episode 4- Beat the Mystery Kid! Return to the Lab!

Spoiler:

Ok. Shall we begin? It's kinda dark... Whatever.


How hilarious. Ha. Ha.


Whee.


*sigh* Do I have to?


I've been standing here the whole time, idiot.


Sure. Whatever.


So, I train monaters and whatnot? I should hook mine up to a PC and juice it up.


Nothing. It's all in your head.


You sure 'bout that?


You have a good monster, but bad English skills.


What's the competition over? Monies?


Kinda sounds like kiosk, doesn't it? HAHA A QIAOK KIOSK. /shot


It went squeak? I don't get it.


MAKE UP YOUR MINDS PEOPLE!


WHAT IS IT? MONEY!!?!?!?


TIMBERRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!!


LEVEL GET.


Ok. Who's messing with me?


So he won? I made his squeaky kiosk thing fall. I should have won.


Oh, I won? Damn rights.


Some prize.


Have fun with that.


I swore I'd never return to this place...


As if. But wait. He has to do with red and long hair or he has red and long hair? I'm confused.


Yes, he was hell. He shoved me out of his way. He's not polite one bit.


Did I ask to say my name?

After some thought (And input from the IRC,) I decided to go with the name JASON.


SENTENCE FRAGMENT DERP.


You're welcome. I feel like a good samaritan today.


Some stupid egg with people in it.


Take it.


What? WHAT?


facepalm


Yes, I got that handbook from Dr. Oujido. HANDS OFF, BASTARD! IT'S MINE.


Yes, we are both sleeping. *slap*


What coach?


So I have the tendency to become a champion. That sounds like fool's talk.


They ain't hugging me yet, so I'm not convinced.


Guix... WHAT IS THESE WORDS YOU SPEAK OF?


Okie. Byyyyyyeeeeeeeee!


*sigh* What now?


I make illustrated icons? They are illustrated, idiot.


Uh... What?


What?


That sounds dirty.


WHO ARE YOU?? GO AWAY.


Uh... None. I just got some Huge Balls... Eew.


Sure... I guess...


Derpy dude is derpy.


It's a prop. Wut?


So that is your name, ??X?? ? Nice to meet you.


Trés grands succès!!! Very great success!!!


This song summarizes what this man is saying.


It must be.


I never get tired of this.


And here is where we finish for today.

Are promises of championship possible to reach? Will we even reach Guixiang City in one piece? Find out soon!

Episode 5- Guixiang City and the puzzling puzzles!

AND AS BY REQUEST...
I went to my house and talked to the accessories. Here are the results.

Spoiler:

We have a pool in the kitchen? Awesome.


It's called a freezer, duh.


Why would you put coffee in the fridge?


That made no sense.


Oh. That's why food was always burnt. Remind me to never eat here again.

[jynx]

Originally Posted by Zayin

I died laughing when I watched the youtube vids (here's the link, the animators are pretty funny).

.

This is so hilarious. The oven line is pretty epic indeed, it says "Volcano bakemeat" xD. One of my favourites lines was "Huge ball bag f**k". Or something like that xD.

LOL!
All the Pokemon names are like random letters.

[Camden298]

Haha, great job, Team Fail! xD I loved this LP lmao