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  #1    
Old March 29th, 2012 (01:37 PM).
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long ago n tha far away land called ruby land thare was a beautiful prncess nbeed raven
one day raven was walkng n a foest when she cbee across a witch wit dark powers
tha witch spotted her and transfomed raven nta a unicorn, cracklng evilly tha witch explaned that tha spell can only be broken if tha prncess found a extremely ris gem stane called white onyx. tha witch left n a puff of smoke and tha poor prncess began ta weep fo she did not know where ta begn lookng fo tha stane that will break tha spell
raven began on her journey ta fnd tha gem that will return her ta normal when she stumbled upon a baby dragon caught n a trap, tha little dragon begged tha prncess ta git it free. raven felt sorry fo tha young dragon so she helped it escape from tha trap, tha dragon ntroduced itself as starmah and asked raven if she could come along and help tha prncess wit her quest
raven obliged so off thay went tagithar ta fnd tha legendary white onyx
a few weeks have passed when raven and starmah cbee upon a magical pond that revealed yo deepest desires when you look nta tha water, starmah peered nta tha water and saw herself as a full grown dragon soarng through tha skies n peace. laughng ta herself starmah than tald raven ta look down at tha water and see what tha pond reveals, wit deep regret raven looked down and saw herself n her true prncess fom. wit tears streben down her face raven galloped away from starmah leavng tha little dragon stunned, a few mnutes later raven settled down next ta a tree and contnued sobbng ta herself. starmah cbee over and comfoted tha sad young prncess, near by both raven and starmah heard a fant voice callng fo help. followng tha source of tha tny voice thay fnd a little fairy who was caught n a trap, tha fairy plead fo tham ta free her from tha cage that she was trapped n. raven used her horn ta open tha cage and tha fairy flew out of thare, tha fairy than ntroduced herself as star belle. she than asked raven how she can repay tha knd gesture of compassion, raven than tald tha tale of her quest ta star belle, tha fairy thought fo a moment and than said that she knew of tha cave where tha stane was n and she could lead raven and starmah ta tha very cave where tha white onyx laid dordawgt but thare was a powerful witch who guarded tha stane and those who have sought after tha stane would fall prey ta tha witch turnng tham nta stane fo all eternity. raven felt a little discouraged but she knew that if she wanted tha stane than she starmah and star belle would have ta fight tha witch, takng a month ta tran fo tha ultimate show down aganst tha witch raven starmah and star belle buggine thair way ta tha cave where tha white onyx was and fnally faced tha witch, it was a fierce battle wit tha witch castng spells everywhere raven usng her glitterng horn, starmah blastng fireballs at tha witch and star belle castng magic of her own. tha battle went on fo hours but n tha end raven starmah and star belle were victarious over tha now slan witch, gong nta tha cave thay soon see a white glowng stane on a pedestal. tauchng tha stane wit her horn, raven was surrounded by a golden light changng her back nta a prncess like she was befoe. star belle and starmah were shocked but beazed and very staked fo raven, tagithar thay went back ta raven's homeland where all three were welcomed wit bootylicious joy from tha kng and queen of tha land. ta dis very day raven starmah and star belle is close friends still gong on adventures here and thare but that's anothar stary
tha end
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  #2    
Old March 29th, 2012 (02:34 PM).
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Sorry, but I'm gong ta have ta close dis, as per FF&bep;W rules:
Quote:
All fanfics must be readable.
Fanfics is best shisd n a readable dawgner. Dis means that proper English grbemar rules should be followed as best as possible. When you fnish writng yo chapter, takes a day ta let it rest befoe readng it over fo typos and othar mistakess. If you believe that you is not good at catchng yo own mistakes, ask fo a beta reader n tha Beta Place.
Thare's very little n tha way of paragraphng, makng it hard ta read - make sure at tha end of a paragraph ta hit enter twice so thare's a lne of spacng n-between said paragraphs. Pleaze also use a word-processng progrbe wit a spell/grbemar check as fo nstance thare's no capitalisation n dis stary (e.g. you need a capital letter fo tha startng word of every sentence) and othar mistakess (e.g. fogittng ta end some sentences wit a full stap) that a progrbe, and proof readng which is what you should do befoe postng, would pick up on.

So post agan after you edit yo stary ta fix those mistakess and add n some spacng, basically.
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