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Old July 20th, 2012, 06:02 PM
godo156's Avatar
godo156
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Well howdy everybody. I decided to kinda do a screenshot run. It will not have anything to do with any of my other runs. I should mention that this'll be a Storyshot (Even though it has screenshots of the game, this is not meant to be a Let's Play, merely just a story supplemented with said screens. If this is still breakin' rules, and it needs to be moved, I'm sorry, wasn't sure). Expect a few references here and there, but this'll be as original as possible. Oh yeah, I forgot to mention what game I'm playing. I am playin':

A fangame (not hack) made here on the forums. I don't think it's done yet, only a demo, but a big one at that. Yeah, I know nothing of this game besides the fact that it has a few fakemon, so this is gonna be a blind run. I'm editing the text and sprites as I go along. May draw some things for this for fun sometime.
Rules:
-Basic
--No legendaries unless they are the first encounter of the area. Can't use them unless they are one of the weaker ones.
-Modified Crazy Dice (Made by Miss Wasserbeinchen on deviantart/nuzlocke forums)
Crazy Dice rules:
Spoiler:

Each time you enter an area for the FIRST TIME (no re-rolls when you re-enter an area), you roll a die with 20 sides. According to what you roll:
1. Randomly determine a team member. This team member is now dead. (Ignore if team has only one member.)
2. Manually choose a Pokemon. This Pokemon will be killed.
3. Randomly determine a team member. This team member will now be replaced with an equally random box member. The previously boxed member cannot leave the team (unless rolled otherwise) and only if this member dies can the other member who was boxed return to the team. (Ignore if there are no boxed Pokemon.)
4. Randomly determine a team member. This team member cannot evolve, ever, but also has to remain on the team until dead.
5. Randomly determine a team member. This team member is the only one that can be used on this area, until either the member is killed or all important events are done.
6. You can't catch a pokemon here.
7. You can catch the first 2 Pokemon here.
8. You can choose which pokemon you want to catch here.
9. In this area, grass, water and cave levels are each counted as seperate catch chances.
10. You can catch the first 4 pokemon which you encounter, but you may not weaken them at all.
11. You can't use healing items here.
12. You can only use healing items outside of battle.
13. You can only use healing items inside of battle.
14. Buy 10 items.
15. Buy 20 items.
16. Throw away a random item completely.
17. Empty your bag of all items that can be thrown away.
18. For all important battles (Team Rocket, Gym Leaders, Rival battles) you will use the following rules: Randomly determine which move you are allowed to use, if you switch you have to randomly determine to which pokemon you switch and if you want to use an item, you have to flip a coin to decide whether you're allowed to use one or not. (Game of Chance Rules by NONPARAEL, check out his Nuzlocke(s)!)
19. Nothing happens.
20. Choose one Pokemon to resurrect. (You may not save this for later.) Can't be a nuzlocke. Roll again instead.

-Redneck the crap outta this.

And now, to the actual story. It had to be divided into two parts because of around fifty screens. Oh, and be prepared for gifs
__________________________________________
__________________________________________
[big][big]Chapter one-"Now where the heck am I?"[/big][/big]
Here I am, just floatin' in someplace that looks like a dang jumble of crap smushed together. Don't know why I'm here, am I dreamin' or somethin'?
Suddendly, a man comes walking, walking at a calm pace with his arms folded behind his back, like I do. A bench appears near me as he gets closer. When he finally reaches where I'm at, he takes a seat in it.

"...didn't see you there." He said to me. I was on the ground at the moment, sand in my eyes and crap.
"Uh, howdy... Who are ya?" I say, my voice froggy and dry, as if I slept all night without a drink inbetween.

"And I see you have a silly draw... like them Orreans or Unovans over in the AUR*." He chuckles. At this point, I was already up, and then a chair appeared behind me.
"Take a seat, sir." He commanded me. I saw no reason to not to, so I did. Felt like any other couch.
"Nice to meetcha then Mr. Oak sir I guess... Where am I?" I asked. He chuckled again.
"It is nothing for you to be worried about, you are safe. Before you ask, you are not dead, as I would be dead too, and I feel alive as ever. But now onto you. Who are you, young sir? You asked me, now I get to ask you."

"Um... Dalton Radcliffe sir."
"Well hello Dalton! You are currently in a dream bubble(*). This might mean this is real to you, or it may not, whatever you want to believe. I can tell you from expirience though, that these have some signifigance, sometimes a lot. But moving on... wait..."

"It does...?"

He chuckles. I didn't see the humor of the joke, how appropiately timed it was or not, as I still wasn't awake fully.
"...but more seriously... Hm... Let me think about it..."

"And how do ya two know my name in the first place? What do you mean by research? Who's Tamarick or whoever?" I ask. I am very confused. I never met said people or him before in my life, and the fact that they knew my name before I even met them disturbed me even more. Plus the fact that he said that I'd meet him in real life. Why can't he just tell me whatever he wants to say right here and now?
"Well, I'm sorry, Mr. Radcliffe, but I have to leave, and you will have too soo--" Then he started fading, with the rest of the odd dang world I done found myself on. Everything was dark for a moment, and... I woke up.
The room I woke up in was not mine. No blue painted walls, no stripes of planets that I had plastered to them back when I was interested in space, not even the same bed, TV or anything.
"...What the crap...?" I mumble. Yep, drowsy again. Maybe that was actual dream after all. But why am I here? Where is here?

The room was fairly simple, a couple of chairs, a TV, a dresser and a desk. Oh, and the bed and a Wii. I would've done the irresponsible thing, and sit in front of the TV and listen to country music or watch SpongeBob, or even play the Wii. Instead, curious at my surroundin's, I first checked the dresser.


Hmm. Money. I would've taken it right on the spot, but courtesy got the better of me, and I decided to leave it... until I came to the conclusion that nobody might be needing it. I don't have my wallet on me. Shoot. I just stuff it in my pocket. Sorry whoever. There was also some clothes, but I had no idea if they fit me, and that would be even ruder, takin' somebody's clothes. Alright, enough time in this room.
I check out a bedroom window, and I see that I'm on a second floor, got a whole house to explore I guess.

Leavin' the room, I enter a hallway, with another couple doorways, to which I presume is another bedroom or two, and possibly a bathroom, and a flight'a stairs. I enter the bedroom(?) door across from the one I was in.

Main bedroom? I see nothin' in particular that caught my eye. I left back into the hallway.


And down the stairs. I enter into a living room and such, a woman was sitting at the table, paying attention to something on the phone. Didn't notice me at all. Oh, hey a computer, it may be able to tell me where I am.

Google? Nope, didn't show up. None of the sites I usually went on were there either, minus MSPaintAdventures.com for some odd reason. Hmm, still on mini-hiatus. But dangit! Got frustrated at not being able to find anything out, and smacked some keys at random, out of said frustration, and then a window popped up:

Pokemon? What the heck is that? I just hit enter to see what happened, and then, what I think was a printer shot to life, and I guess printed a 3d copy of what was on the screen. A bottle of blue liquid, with an areosol lid on it. Now I'm askin' myself, not only where am I, but when am I to have machines that could do that?

Well, hate to do this, but gonna bug that one lady to see what's goin' on.
I walk over and poke her arm. Not hard, just enough to get her attention.
"Hey, ma'am, would ya mind tellin' me where I am?" I ask
She looked up to me, with a slightly dazed look in the eye.

Now what the heck was that 'bout? I ran out of the house as fast as I could, with that lady running after me with a shot gun.
"AND STAY OUT!" she shouted at me as I scrambled acrossed the yard, who knows where, just away from there.


Crap, this don't look like anywhere in southeast Ohio ._. I decide to think about the current situation though. No idea where I am, stuck sometime when they have 3d printers, and I didn't even eat breakfast yet. I decide to look around.
There were three directions that I saw that I could go. I look to my right, and I see a wooden path, probably led to nowhere fast, plus walkin' in the woods would just've been just plain dumb, so that option was out. There was a larger path in front of me, and it looked like it headed to someplace with houses. Maybe they can help.

DANGIT GOSHDANG SUNUVAGUN! All of them houses are locked... Why lock up so early... gettin' kinda creeped out now... Just keep movin', Dalton, just keep movin'. I came across somethin' like a county line sign or somethin'... let's see what it says...

Hazelseed? Why name a town after a plant? Journeys? I notice a path further in the same direction that I entered, so I walk down there.

Kinda gettin' to be a steep climb...

Shoot. A dead end. I don't think I can move this rock. I can try... Hrumph! Hurrrgh! Nope, ain't budgin'. Dang. I turn around, and see a small spheroid object sitting on the ground. Looks brand new. What the heck is something like that doin' here. More importantly, what is it?
I get close enough, and grab it. Red at the top, white at the bottom, and a black stripe in the middle. Oh, and a button it looks like. I press the button...

...another one of them bottle things? I put it in my pocket, as well as the empty casing it was in. Runnin' outta room here...
Dang it's getting late. In a spooky lil' town at night time, not knowin' where I am. And now it's gettin' dark out, how can things get any better? I head back to the crossroads, and decide to go the one last path I haven't tried yet. Ain't no harm now.

((Was getting used to color adjusting my sprite for night time, better in the next screens))
Great, more hikin'...

After reachin' a steady part of the hill, I notice thesse two guys here, chattin' bout somethin'.
I walk up to them, and try to ask them something, but the man nearest to me started talking first...


"...told me how he found you in his son's bedroom, sleeping on the floor or something."
"Uh, sir, where am I?" I ask the man.
"Well you are in this little fine town of Hazelseed."
I slap my forehead.
"What country, I mean?"
"Country?" He looked at me with puzzled look on his face. "I forgot, but I know we are currently in the Evoran Region."
Wha-....? Evoran Region? Don't sound familiar to me
Then the guy next to him started talkin' to me.


"...were you in my house?"
"Dalton. I don't know why ended up there sir. I don't know where I am compared to where I lived or anythin'." I reply, tired of having to tell the story. He calmly listened to me, not interrupting me like who I presume is his wife.
"Okay then. Where do you live?" He asked. A logical question, finally.
"Deersville, Ohio, USA." I answer.
"Hmm... Don't know where that is kid. But..."


"...be good company on the way. Maybe even try out as a Pokemon trainer!"
"Thank ya so much sir!" I say to the man, pleased that he is actually going to help me on short notice, but there was a couple of questions I had to ask. Pokemon trainer? What are those? What the heck are Pokemon?"
"What?! Don't know Pokemon? Have you been living under a rock your whole life? How could you not know what Pokemon are." He was shocked to learn I had no idea what those are.
"Well, they were never a thing that I've heard before today, so..." Did he just call me Patrick Star?
"The professor should be able to tell him accurately." Phil said.
"Perfect idea! We were going to head to the professor's to let him know that we are ready to leave, and get Pokemon to defend ourselves. Maybe he'll let you have one, as well as explain what they are to you. Follow along Dalton!"
He said follow, but I don't really think that I could keep up if they start running. In the dark. Oh well, at least I have someone to help me.

Whelp, looks like a straight path... should be safe by myself...

See, that wasn't that bad, was it? I see a town past these hills. I proceed further...

What am I supposed to do now? Jump off this ledge? What the heck is this crap. Alright, Looks like I have to... Hup! Ack!
Down. Hey, there's that Phil guy. Must be waitin' for me.

"...I thought that it would be nice to show you around. The place I'm going to show you is actually a chain business, so expect to see them at almost every town." He says to me. He then takes me to a red-roofed building, lit up outta every window I see in the front.

"...Center, but a shorter name for it would be Pokecenter. I think that's what your younger generation calls it to abbreviate. And no, I won't answer what a pokemon is. Why don't you go inside and check somethings in there out. I'll be at Tamarick's place. I'm sure you'll find it eventually, it is in that direction." He says, and points behind us. That dang Tamarick name again.
He leaves in that direction, and I decide it wouldn't be no harm to go inside the "Pokecenter".
The lobby was fair sized, two store counters, one blue, with shelves of supplies and such. There is a guy in his early twenties sitting behind the counter, fully payin' attention to what was on the screen. Oh, and what I think is their version of Wendy's next to the what I think is the store. Might get somethin' to eat. Still didn't eat breakfast.
I decided to ask the man some things.
"So this is a store, sir?"
He shuts off music or whatever that he was listenin' to, turned around and greeted me.
"Yes, but I'm sorry to say, we do not have any supplies at the moment."
"Actually, I didn't come for buying anything. I just came to ask-"
"We don't have anything you can buy yet." he interruped me. I look up at the shelves. Stocked. Not filled to the brim, but to say he had nothin' I could buy was a lie.
"But what 'bout the crap ya have up there?" I point to the shelves.
"What **** kid? You must be seeing things."
"But-"
"Just go kid. I have, like a half hour left on shift. I don't get internet at home, so quit bugging me." He just puts on his headphones again, and ignored me.
Dang butthole. Bet he just works here to get free internet. I go over to their "Wendy's" and order a what I believe is a plain cheese burger and fries. They put it in a bag, so I decided to look around somemore. Maybe the other counter?
The other counter was red-toned, with healing crosses printed in a few places. A doctor's office? Is this like an advanced general store or somethin'? Two ladies were sitting behind the counters, in their fourties, looking oddly alike. Must be twins.
I go to the lady at the side part of the counter for some reason first instead of the front lady...

"...for only fifty-thousand dollars. If you have a Pokemon that recently died, we might be able to revive them." she said.
"Excuse me, what is a Pokemon?" I ask. She just laughs like I just said a joke.
"Oh, you kids and your practical jokes."
"But ma'am..."
"Nope, not falling for it kid."
Ugh, why ain't nobody takin' me seriously?
I leave the lady alone, and talk to the one in front.

((Ignore the elder man in the corner. The young guy got let outta shift early))
"Howdy ma'am. Can you help me?" I ask.
"With what sir?"
"Umm, ya know what, nevermind. Sorry for botherin' ya."
"It's no problem. Nice to meet you. Remember, if you ever need your Pokemon quickly healed, just look for the ladies with pink hair!"
"I will keep that in mind ma'am! Wait, so... Your not related to that one other lady over there?"
"Goodness no. Our chain's owner wanted the people working at the hospitals to die our hair pink to match Chansey fur color. That woman over there just looks similar by chance, we are always mistaken for relatives by those who don't know." She explained. No idea what a 'Chansey' is, but I assume if the word 'fur' is used, it's most likely an animal of some sort.
I decide to go up a staircase, where I found some tables. I eat my burger and fries. I threw away the wrapper, and just as I was about to leave, a kid around the age of thirteen came up and asked me:
"Hey, are you a trainer?"
"No..." I answer.
"Well that's a shame....I am though!"
"Great..." Wanna get outta this conversation right now.

"...a Snorlax sleeping on the path." No idea what a 'Snorelax' is either. Might be a slang term for whatever it is. Hey, at least it makes sense somewhat, maybe it snores...Ah heck with that, just forget it.
"Anythin' else sir? I kinda gotta get goin'."
"Nah, I don't need to bother you any more. Bye."
"See ya."
I leave the place, and I walk down in the direction that that Phil guy directed me to. On the way though, something caught my eye:

What the heck is that thing? I try knocking on the door, and, once again, it was locked so I couldn't ask.
"What are ya little critter?" I ask the thing. I doubt it understands me. Wait, is it a tiny dinosaur with a plant on it's back? ._.
"Bulba!" it roared. Okay, never seen or heard an animal like this one. It came over to the fence, and it looked like it wanted me to pet it's head. I did so, and it made a purrin'-like sound. I chuckle at the...catness of it. I move on down the path.
I see one house down here, and it looks like a side door leads to a path into the hills.
I walk up to a mailbox for the house. On the side it was imprinted into the metal:

Again, that name.
The lights are on, that means somebody is home. I walk inside.
Inside, Grant, the man who's house I woke up in, was talkin' to a balding man, and Phil was just readin' somethin' at a table.

"Oh, you are here finally Dalton. You see this guy standing next to me? He is Professor Tamarick. He may be able to tell you some things."

"...Mightyana got a hold of you."
"How do you know my name?" I ask.
"Dream bubbles remember? Come with me. Let's get you a pokemon and discuss things."

"Those two inside said that you were clueless as to what Pokemon are, and you don't know where you are." He said.
"Yes..."
"Have you recently got amnesia?"
"No, I remember everything that happened before this evenin' sir."
"Can you tell me exactly what happened before you found yourself here?"
"While I was awake, no. I was mereleh just sleepin'."
"About what?"
"About this one elder guy, Samuel Oak I think? He greeted me for the most part."
"Oh, Lord, he actually followed through with his plan. Damn nut!"
"What?"
"He was looking for someone to help me, using dream bubbles. It is a very dangerous thing to do. There are no boundries to where a bubble can go. Tell me, where did you say you live?"
"Ohio, in the United States of America, uh...Earth, 2012." I know he didn't say year or planet, but it didn't hurt to say them.
"Why mention the year? It is 2012 here. Yes. Definately does not sound like anywhere on this planet."
"So...."
"Oak didn't know, or maybe he did know, that dream bubbles could sometimes take not only one's sleeping mind, but their whole body, from where the dream bubble originated. You aren't from here, and not knowing Pokemon is a sign of that."
"Buttnuggets. Fine, can you tell me what Pokemon are then?"
"Pokemon are the creatures that roam this planet."
Much like the animals back home then...
"They are known for their abilities, ranging from breating fire, to controlling darkness, and more."
Well that threw that right off then...
"Every creature in this world that you see besides humans are Pokemon, they can work for us, provide us with food..."
Like farm animals.
"Provide entertainment and possibly make great companions."
Like circus animals or somthin' and pets. Not so far-fetched I guess.
"Okay, I guess I get it now sir. What are Pokemon Trainers then?"
He stands there, with a frustrated look on his face, probably at my lack of his world's knowledge.
"Pokemon trainers are those who, like their title says, train pokemon. To let them get stronger, to get you fame or recognition, and protect you from the dangerous wild Pokemon. You know what? Let's get you a Pokemon, and then you may start to learn."
"Wait, what about my problem with being here and not Ohio and crap?"
"Maybe you'll be lucky enough to come across a dream bubble on your way across the region with Phil and Grant. We're here." He finished explaining. He then pointed to the small little area, with a field, trees, and a pond.
"There are three of the newest litters of my team's offspring. Choose one, and the other two will be given to Phil and Grant."
With that, he stood at the entrance of the cave, and waited while I went off to choose. It took me a bit to find them all, but here they are:

This seed...mask....bush....ya know what? I'm callin' this the grass thing,

This frog/tadpole thing,

And this fire-goat thing. Hm... which one do I choose?
______________________________________________________
_______________________________________________________
Footnotes:
*AUR=Amerecian United Republic. Unova and Orre basically. Maybe the area inbetween, and Game Freak interpretation of America if they ever decide to expand on the country
(*)Dream Bubbles are another realm that you can sometimes find yourself in while sleeping. ((reference to Homestuck, which uses Dream Bubbles))
_____________________________________________________
I leave the choice for the starter up to ya guys.
One vote so far for the fire goat so far. My name really is Dalton. I got the idea to do this, as I always name my characters in game me before changing them, so this time I thought it'd be original if I did it this way. I made my sprite, and inserted it over the character's ingame sprite while editing the screeshots. No edits were made to the game itself.
Oh, about that Bulbasaur, I checked this morning, and the people in the house that leads to it say it needs an owner, but ya need one badge to get it. Is it legit to have?
Thank you so much for readin'!
  #2    
Old July 23rd, 2012, 09:18 PM
Atomic Reactor's Avatar
Atomic Reactor
@atomicreactor
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Haha this is cool! I think it's really cool that you're doing it with my game, I was confused at first cause I didn't realize you were putting your own spin on it, but I like it haha. If I get the time, I'll make sure to read your other updates :)
  #3    
Old July 27th, 2012, 03:31 PM
Mr. Mammoth's Avatar
Mr. Mammoth
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Fire, Water, askfdj... Ya' know what? I'm voting for the grass-thing!

No but seriously. This is quite the interesting concept you've got here Godo(if I may call you that)! This is the stuff that I like to see, something different. But that's just me. Anyway, I also like (as the dear creator of this game said) that you're making your own spin or interpretation of this. Like the fact that you use a custom made sprite to symbolize yourself and that you're in the Pokémon world from the real one and whatnot.

So, I'll say good luck to you sir and I'm looking forward to further updates.
  #4    
Old July 27th, 2012, 07:48 PM
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bobandbill
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I'm going to move this. Stories here just don't get supplimented with screenshots of the game (even if the story is a parody or retelling or whatnot of a game it's done with words alone, not a few words to couple each pictures straight from an emulator), while Let's Plays do involve screenshots.


  #5    
Old July 27th, 2012, 09:21 PM
godo156's Avatar
godo156
All Hail the Glow Cloud
 
Join Date: Aug 2010
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Replies:
Haha this is cool! I think it's really cool that you're doing it with my game, I was confused at first cause I didn't realize you were putting your own spin on it, but I like it haha. If I get the time, I'll make sure to read your other updates
@Atomic Reactor: Thank ya sir. Glad ya approved me of nuzlockin' your game. Yep, my own lil' spin.

@Mr. Mammoth: Oops, already chose :I.
@BobandBill: Thank ya sir. Didn't know truefully where to put it. Thanks for moving it in the correct area.
But Thank ya sir. Glad to have ya both readin'.
Okay, a little late, but here’s chapter two!
2. Challenges and Those Who Accept Them.
_________________________________________________________
After looking at the three odd beasts, I finally chose. He presented me with three choices; grass, fire, and water. I noticed how the goat-thing was kinda lookin’ down and lonely, so I chose…

“Yep” I answer.
“Okay. The others will go to Grant and Phil. Oh yeah, I forgot to ask, would you like to give this little guy a name?

“Yes, I guess…” I think of a name. “I’ll call it Oliver?”
“Him,” Tamarick corrected me. “And Oliver? Why that?”
“Well, I didn’t know if he were a boy or girl goat, so I said the first name that would work for either one.”
“Uh… You should be able to tell if he were male or female if it were missing—“
“I ain’t gonna look. Give the creature some privacy.” I interrupt, already knowin’ where he was goin’ with that.
I hold the little creature up to me.
“Huh. Ya ain’t different that much from the goats my neighbor used to have, well, before they tried breakin’ in his house…” I chuckle, rememberin’ the incident. I scratch the fur softly around his horns, and on his forehead. He nuzzled my hand. Nope, not different at all, well, besides the flame on the top of it’s head. It don’t seem to hurt it. Heck with logic at the moment.
“I see you will make a good Pokemon trainer. You take care of it now, you hear me? It’s one of the few of it’s kind. It’s endangered.” He somehow transfers the goat into a spherical object, and gives it to me. “This is Oliver’s Pokeball, he goes in here, other pokemon are like this.”
“Yes sir.”
I leave after he hands me a backpack, as he noticed I was having trouble walking with all that crap in my pockets.

I walked directly out, not caring to see the two adults get “Pokemon” themselves. Too tired. I walk to the “Pokecenter” and talk to the man at the counter.

“Can I get a room for the night here?” I ask. I saw rooms that seemed to be like a motel or something.
“Sure. It’s free to stay. Here’s your key.” He hands me the said key, and points to one of the first rooms.
“Thank you sir.”
“No problem.”
I walk to the room, sit the bookbag down, release the pokemon from the ball, and fall asleep.
I wake up the next morning with Grant over me, shouting:
“Get up!”
“Wha-?” I say, startled.
“We’ve got to go early if we want to make some progress.”
“Gosh dangit."
I get ready, I order a quick breakfast, and headed out. As soon as I found them, Grant started talking.

“Uh… Sure”
“Oh yeah, forgot to introduce myself.”

((Goshdang that battle sprite took forever to sprite from a drawin'))
“The name is Grant. Grant Maxwell.” He said
“Like Noah Maxwell on Tribe Twelve ._.?”
“Who?”
He then sent out his Pokemon.

“Okay, the point of battling is to knock the other competitor out. Try to knock mine out. I’ll go easy on you.”
“Okay”

((Well, shoot, that was even after using the potions ._.))

“Good job Dalton! The loser has to pay prize money, so here you go!” he says as he hands me money.
He then heads off. “We’re going to scout ahead. Why don’t you train up your Pokemon for a bit.”
Well fine. I notice after looking at my bookbag, that somebody put a map inside.

Yep. Have no clue where this is…
I didn’t train at all really. Too bullcrappy.
I walk in the direction that they went.

((No dice rule yet, Forgot to roll, but I did later. That will be covered later.))
I walk further, and then I see Phil standing at what looks to be a gatehouse .
I go up to him and ask what he was doing there.
“Oh, just waiting on Grant, he’s checking up north. I wish we could go on…”

“…or might have to go through the forest behind this Route gate. It leads into Nidopoint Woods. Go check up on Grant for me please.”
“Okay.”
I walk up north, wading through the small field and it’s tall grass. I spot Mr. Maxwell standing in front of… some large blue animal that looked like it was laying on it’s back.
“Uh… is that thing dead?” I ask him, pointing to the animal.
“Goodness no! Just sleeping.” He answered.
“May I ask, what the heck is it?”
“Oh, this is a Snorlax right here. They are known for their miniture versions of hibernations, and, well, this one is deciding do to just that. In the middle of the road. There is a man over in Pineroot city that is known for being able to wake sleeping Pokemon…

“I guess. That means we’ll have to go through that one woods place?”
“Yes.”
“Woods are nice I guess, but aren’t we drivin’ a car or somethin’?”
“We don’t have those around this part of the region. The more populated areas have them though.”
He walks down to the gate house. I decide to follow a couple minutes after poking the sleeping pokemon. A lot more fur than fatness, as it appears.
I walk throught the entrance, and then I was greeted by Mr. Maxwell and Phil talking to… him…
It was that guy again, the one from the dream.


“Excuse me Mr. Radcliffe? I would not have guess talking to you in a dream bubble would send you here.” He said, with an honest look on his face. Maybe he didn’t?
“Uh… I take it you two know each other already?” Grant said
“You could say that Mr. Maxwell.” Oak said to him. “You two go on ahead. I’m going to give Dalton here the necessities for his journey.”
“Okay.” Phil and Grant say, walking out the other side of the building.


“Okay, young sir, these items are what I give any new trainer I come across. The Pokeballs are used to catch Pokemon, and the Pokedex gives you information and helps you out in a fix.”
“But why give them to me?”
“Well, Tamarick contacted me about this, and told me how you might be able to come across another dream bubble, and you may get lucky and make it back to your home if you travel across the region. But, I should mention, my son is studying in this region. If you meet him, tell him I said hello.”
“Can’t I get a direct solution?”
“No.”
“Heck with this…” I say. I wasn’t fully awake yet, angry, and told to travel across a country I’ve never been in. I run out of the entrence I came in. I don’t want to deal with those strangers. It was stupid of me to act that way yesterday. I run to the beginin’ of a wooded area. I lose my breath from the runnin’, and then I notice it is becomin’ unnaturally dark for mornin’. And so cold…

“Hello me lad.”
Who the heck is that? I turn around to find…some kind of shadowy mist…
“Who the heck are you? What the heck are you?!” I ask, frightened. I back up further into the woods.
“I am merely somebody who would be… Willing to help. Heheheh…”
I am extremely freaked out by… this thing. I pick up the nearest thing that I could find. A branch. I chuck it at. It seems to be nothing.
“Lad, ye cannot hurt me. I am merely a projected image. Like I just said, I am here to help you. You are not from this world, correct lad?”
“Yes…”
“You see. I will help you get back to your world. But in return I need payment.”
“R-really? What kind? I will pay to get back. Need money?”
“No me lad. What I need… is entertainment. I am extremely bored bound to this island. I want you to go across this country and challenge people. Under my set of rules, also to make it more entertaining.”
“What.” I say. Bullcrap again. “Why do I have to do that?”
“NOW LISTEN. I AM BORED AND I DEMAND ENTERTAINMENT. OR I SWEAR I WILL SURFACE YOUR WORST NIGHTMARES AND KILL YOU ON THE SPOT.”
“Heck with ya-Crapcrapcrap…” I try to say, but suddenly it gets much colder, and I start coughing nonstop. I see a shadow of a really tall person. I look in the direction of the shadow, and I see a sight that horrified me. Slender Man. Dangit dangitdangit...
“Makeitgoawaymakeitgoaway.”
“Fine. Will you accept my challenge?” With that, it disappeared.
“Yes…”
“Good…” it said. Suddenly a pitch black die appeared in my hand. 20 sides.
“Every place I consider a new area, this die will automatically roll. It will decide what happens to you and your Pokemon. If the Pokemon you have on you get to a point I consider undeserving to live, I may kill them. And you must only catch one of these pitiful Pokemon per which I consider an area. Understand?”
I nod, and it just disappears.
The sun begins to rise over the trees, it’s finally mornin’.
I decide to go through the previous town again for some reason.
I stop at the place with the little plant dinosaur. There was a man and woman there. Husband and wife.
“Excuse me, but what is that thing in your back yard?”
“Oh, that is my son’s Bulbasaur. Or, used to be. My son is a gym leader in a town nearby,

“Okay sir.”
I leave the house, and then I decide to walk near the path to the first town. The die rolls.
“You are allowed to catch the first Pokemon on each terrain you come across, but only allowed to use the first one.”
I could only see grass around, so I walk in the grass.

“Howdy there…” I mumble.
“Hello sir.” The bird replied. Wait, replied? I fall over at this discovery. “Are you a trainer?”
“Uh.. I guess.”
“Can I join you? I want to be stronger. The name is Justin.”
“Sure.” I say as I drop a ball. I have no idea how these things work, but hopefully the bird knew. And he did. He pressed his beak against a button on the divider, and then he shot inside...
______________________________________________________________
Done with chapter two finally.
Here is the team:

Grinded up Justin to level six on this route. Dangit, he was a pain to grind, Oliver had to save his can often.

Oh, and this is what he said in truth about his son/grandson. In reality, though me in-story sees Oak as old, he is really just forty. His hair just grayed real quick. But that means I'll have to deal with Gary/Blue Mothertruckin' Oak now (or not? I haven't gotten any further than this besides grinding, so I wouldn't know). Don't yell at me. I like messing with people's ages. On second thought, this might just be connected to my other runs, via this being an alternate timeline/some other bullcrap. My interpretations of characters appearing, and some of my own. My version of Oak is that young.
  #6    
Old August 13th, 2012, 04:45 PM
Mr. Mammoth's Avatar
Mr. Mammoth
One cool snowman
 
Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: Wherever there is ice
Age: 18
Gender: Male
Nature: Relaxed
Quote:
@Mr. Mammoth: Oops, already chose :I.
Well gersh dangit!

Nah, I'm just kidding. As usual Godo, I find this way of merging screenshots with writing in a story interesting and yada yada. However, as this was intended as a "fanfic" at first, I'll treat the writing aspect of it as such. These are just some minor things, but as a lazy perfectionist I want to change stuff to be perfect without doing basically anything.

Quote:
Our chain's owner wanted the people working at the hospitals to die our hair pink to match Chansey fur color.
I think that you mean 'dye' here. Wouldn't want those women to lose their hair already in their forties! Okay, I'll stop with the jokes now as they are making me physically sick to my stomach as opposed to everyone else.

Quote:
He is Professor Tamarick.
Now this is something that bothered me a bit, although it is VERY minor like Mightyena being spelled 'Mightyana'. His name is correctly spelled 'Tamarack'. Misspellings of his name occurs some times too in the current chapters. I can accept that Dalton himself would say it like that since 1, he is a bit tired and is probably more likely to jumble up words. And 2, he is a redneck correct? Now I don't know much about how rednecks talk, but that could just be a dialect-thingy for all I know. But Phil saying it wrong - a man who's known Tamarack for quite some time I imagine - kinda strikes me as odd.

And finally. Since part of this is text-based, you should always have some space between to pieces of dialouge when two people are talking to make it easier for people to read.

So instead of:

"I'm just gonna' come to try and help you here." Mr. Mammoth said.
"Oh boy! Thank you sir!" Godo replied happily.
"No need to thank me," Mr. Mammoth began, "I was just trying to help."

Try:

"I'm just gonna' come to try and help you here." Mr. Mammoth said.

"Oh boy! Thank you sir!" Godo replied happily.

"No need to thank me," Mr. Mammoth began, "I was just trying to help."

---

But other than my extremely minor nitpicks, this is really good. And I'm very excited for the continuation, I'll be waiting eagerly for it.

Last edited by Mr. Mammoth; August 13th, 2012 at 04:53 PM.
  #7    
Old August 14th, 2012, 11:22 AM
Kimbo's Avatar
Kimbo
Trainer
 
Join Date: Nov 2011
Location: England
Age: 21
Gender: Male
Nature: Jolly
Im really enjoying this, its different to everything else on here (not saying any content is bad) and you are a very imaginative fellow. Please keep going with this
Visit My Channel for Pokemon Battles & LP's !!
http://www.youtube.com/user/mattykgaming

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