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  #1    
Old July 21st, 2012, 06:32 PM
Zapp Rowsdower's Avatar
Zapp Rowsdower
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Once upon a dreary road, a trainer wandered solemnly;
Against a battle loss he fought inside his mental home.
Both outside and inside him he felt so gruesomely.
Later soon he realized that he was not alone.

In front of him a Wynaut walked across the beaten path.
"Why must you annoy me so?" he asked with anger fraught.
The Wynaut smiled in the face of the angry trainer's wrath,
And, as all the others do, simply stated, "Wynaut?"

The trainer then became perplexed, confusion in his anger's place,
"Why do you confuse me now, making me distraught?"
Again the Wynaut grinned aloud, a frivolous young face,
Saying naught but the following: "Wynaut?"

The trainer appeared to understand, though confusion remained.
"Why can't you say anything else but that confounded thought?"
He asked as the battle's thoughts had waned.
The opposite party's ambassador replied, "Wynaut?"

"I suppose, but why can you smile in the face of rage?
You have left my hardened stomach in a nervous knot.”
Both of them were clueless and on a different page,
As the response still remained to be, “Wynaut?”

Our hero nodded, finding solace in the other’s smiling face.
He sat down beside it, no longer with anger fraught.
Saying, “Why did you choose to comfort me, even in my lack of grace?”
The Wynaut said his final word: “Because.”

Last edited by Zapp Rowsdower; July 24th, 2012 at 10:05 AM. Reason: Rewording
  #2    
Old July 23rd, 2012, 12:32 PM
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Witty and punny I loved it! <3
Was this at all influenced by The Raven by Edgar Allen Poe? I've been working on the parody of that for a while and I saw some resemblances to it in structure and rhyming scheme, which is why I ask
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  #3    
Old July 23rd, 2012, 05:04 PM
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I also enjoyed this one; it was a nice poem and an amusing one too. Hurrah for playing with Wynaut's name! The simple twist of it saying 'Because' at the end was quite effective too. The only thing I would critise is that sometimes the sentences did not quite seem to flow too nicely with each other in the third stanza; otherwise great work with this poem!
Quote:
The Wynaut smiled in the face of angry trainers' wrath,
I feel this would be better as '...face of the angry trainer's wrath' as there's only one here. If you mean to say multiple trainers though then maybe some rewording to make that clearer would be in order.
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Old July 24th, 2012, 10:20 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Pikachukid View Post
Witty and punny I loved it! <3
Was this at all influenced by The Raven by Edgar Allen Poe? I've been working on the parody of that for a while and I saw some resemblances to it in structure and rhyming scheme, which is why I ask
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It's impressive that you spotted that, for I was, in fact, inspired by Poe's classic poem, but I was imitating more of the premise of the poem than the structure. You know, with the character interrogating the foreign creature, but having it only say one word in response, the result varying depending on the question. I noted the word play when I first received the Wynaut from Lavaridge Town a few years ago. I was thinking of inserting it into a chapter of a story I was writing, but it worked much better as a whimsical little poem.
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Old July 24th, 2012, 06:56 PM
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Pikachukid
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Zapp Rowsdower View Post
Congratulations, you win a NEW CAR!
It's impressive that you spotted that, for I was, in fact, inspired by Poe's classic poem, but I was imitating more of the premise of the poem than the structure. You know, with the character interrogating the foreign creature, but having it only say one word in response, the result varying depending on the question. I noted the word play when I first received the Wynaut from Lavaridge Town a few years ago. I was thinking of inserting it into a chapter of a story I was writing, but it worked much better as a whimsical little poem.
Haha Wynaut saying only one word was a huge hint too. Everything was very "The Raven" about it. I'm following the structure more than anything I don't think i'm even including Pokemon OR any animals in mine lol. But I keep working on the rhyming schemes, a bit on the syllables (not one of my greatest strengths), and story line. Maybe I'm making it seem like it'll be better than it will be but I won't publish it here until I'm satisfied with it.

Oh yeah and what type of car?
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  #6    
Old November 29th, 2012, 06:19 AM
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simple, punny and yet complex. How the littlest of deed such as a smile can bring light back to the damned.
it's beautiful to say the least specially the surprise at the end. Hope to read more of your work.
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  #7    
Old November 30th, 2012, 03:14 PM
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