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  #3276    
Old November 30th, 2012 (04:29 AM).
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Mononoke Hime Mononoke Hime is offline
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Quote originally posted by PhantomX0990:
I'm just wondering if anyone has an opinion. I'm trying to sort my thoughts here.
I think that this bunch of labels are just that: labels.
Like SassyMilkshake said, you are what you are. Furthermore, this labels are only to guide someone to know him or herself. Each case is different, believe it, so you don't have to worry about you don't following the model of some label, afterall you're an individual being. You are what you are, and set aside these labels if they're giving you any worries. They weren't meant for that.


Though it's a different question, I was thinking about something.

I know that the gender doesn't affect the sexuality, like only because someone is transgender this doesn't means that this person is homosexual too.
But my question is:
Why do people relate transgenders with homosexuality?

What I think is that society sees everyone in standarts, such as manxwoman and womanxman. If a man feels like a woman, so he necessarily has to be attracted to other men, because that's what woman must do.
This same rule has to apply to the homosexuals themselves in their relationships. Most of people think that in a gay couple, one has to assume the role of the "woman", and the other, of the "man".
So everyone has to follow this model. I think this hole concept is completety misunderstood.

I wanna know what other people here think of this topic.
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  #3277    
Old November 30th, 2012 (08:29 AM).
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Don't mean to change the subject to quickly but I have POSSIBLE BIG NEWS!

The US Supreme Court is deciding today if it's going to take up same-sex marriage. There are 8 possible challenges to bans (including California's Prop 8 ban and the national DOMA law which makes same-sex marriage illegal at the federal level) that the court might take up. Depending on what challenges they choose to hear and what they decide (if they do) we could see marriage equality become a reality very, very soon.

If the court doesn't take up Prop 8, for instance, it would mean that whatever the last court, the one right below the Supreme Court, ruled on it would be the final ruling, and that court said it was crap, so in California, in perhaps a matter of house, we might hear that it's (or will be soon) legal to marry again.

Now if SCOTUS decides to hear one of the challenges to DOMA directly there's every possibility that they could overturn ALL marriage bans in the country, although there's just as much a chance in this scenario that if they rule against DOMA they'll just say that states should decide who can get married and leave all the bans in place.

So... yeah. Could be a crazy good day.
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  #3278    
Old November 30th, 2012 (09:17 AM).
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Hey guys,
I just joined the forums but I would also really like to be a part of this club, please
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  #3279    
Old November 30th, 2012 (10:31 AM).
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Welcome to PC and the Connection, LaVida! Of course you're welcome here just like everyone else (besides trolls! :D), but I must apologize. We seem to have lost our special welcoming hat/crown some time ago, so we must rely on our quirky wit and conversationalism to make you feel special!
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Old November 30th, 2012 (09:07 PM).
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I hope the governement listens to thr REAL gay agenda:
1. Achieve equality
2. See item 1
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  #3281    
Old December 1st, 2012 (02:21 AM).
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Quote originally posted by TornZero:
but I must apologize. We seem to have lost our special welcoming hat/crown some time ago, so we must rely on our quirky wit and conversationalism to make you feel special!
Aww, that's really too bad :/ I think, I must resign now.

Haha, just kidding. Thank you.

Maybe I should add why I wanted to join: I'm a supporter of LGBT rights and although I don't really like putting labels on myself, I think, I'm bisexual. I'm not so sure about this, though, it's kind of confusing haha.

I read a lot of posts in this thread and it seems rather interesting and enjoyable.
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  #3282    
Old December 1st, 2012 (10:41 AM). Edited December 1st, 2012 by Alice.
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Welcome laVida! There are surprisingly few bisexuals here, considering it's likely the most common non-straight sexuality. (Or at least, I would assume so.)
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  #3283    
Old December 1st, 2012 (11:28 AM).
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Quote originally posted by Mononoke Hime:
I know that the gender doesn't affect the sexuality, like only because someone is transgender this doesn't means that this person is homosexual too.
But my question is:
Why do people relate transgenders with homosexuality?
Well, most people don't really understand what being transgender is and it's already a strain for them to understand that a gay relationship doesn't have a "man" and a "woman." It doesn't help that there are phrases like "woman in a man's body" and so on which confuse people.
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  #3284    
Old December 1st, 2012 (06:23 PM).
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From my experiences, people think that being trans is just a cover-up for being gay. They think oh, being a girl is my "way out of being gay", which I don't completely understand, because I see no shame in who I am, why would I be afraid to come out as homosexual? Also people don't understand how gender really doesn't determine your sexuality. Assumptions are made that if you "change your gender", your sexuality must be changed too (assuming you were straight, which definitely is not always the case).
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Old December 1st, 2012 (08:42 PM).
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Quote originally posted by Sassy Milkshake:
From my experiences, people think that being trans is just a cover-up for being gay. They think oh, being a girl is my "way out of being gay", which I don't completely understand, because I see no shame in who I am, why would I be afraid to come out as homosexual?
What I don't get is that trans*ism is typically considered worse than being homosexual. Why wouldn't someone pick the lesser of two evils? This is especially odd knowing that homosexuality is becoming much more widespread as an accepted thing.
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  #3286    
Old December 1st, 2012 (09:10 PM).
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Quote originally posted by TornZero:
What I don't get is that trans*ism is typically considered worse than being homosexual. Why wouldn't someone pick the lesser of two evils? This is especially odd knowing that homosexuality is becoming much more widespread as an accepted thing.
People have to understand that being trans has much more to it than just sexuality. Sure a trans person may be homosexual, but being trans for me has to do with being in the wrong body and just associating with the characteristics of the other sex. So if someone who knew they were trans chose to be be homosexual and not a member of the other sex, they ultimately shouldn't be called trans. It's essentially two semi-unrelated things.
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  #3287    
Old December 3rd, 2012 (07:50 AM).
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Quote originally posted by PhantomX0990:

Now, I'm not a 'girly girl' by any means whatsoever. I wasn't raised with girls, rather my cousins who were 'tough guys' that I beat up on regular occasions because their idiots, but I love them like brothers. I can count how many times I've worn a dress on one hand. (Three by the way; my Communion, when I was my parent's flower girl, and my 8th grade graduation ceremony (I scared people that day, they were like "Holy ****, Ash is that you?" I, on the other hand was like, "Shut it.") I don't like pink all that much, I don't wear makeup very often... or at all most of the time. I don't giggle at stupid things, or have to go to bathroom in groups. (Seriously, I don't get it.) (Aaaand I'm probably being a stereotypical jerk-butt, but I'm making a point.) I've always hung out with guys, been one of the guys, my best friends are guys.

But I am by no means a guy.

I don't want to be a guy.

I've never thought about being a guy.

But I don't really fit in as a woman either. At least, not as society says I should. I know I'm a tomboy, but I don't go out of my way to be so. I don't look it at least, besides not wearing women's clothes. (Seriously, I hate women's tee shirts. I want sleeves dammit.)
Hey there
I think it is totally ok to not fit the clichés that society has about women. Just because you don't act "girly" (this term is already something society has made up), that doesn't mean that you are less than a woman. Of course, it is alright if you don't think of yourself as anything. I just wanted to point out that, in order to be a woman, you don't have to like pink or wear make-up etc. Sorry, if I got your post wrong. This is just what I first thought when I read your comment
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  #3288    
Old December 3rd, 2012 (08:28 AM).
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Minato Arisato Minato Arisato is offline
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Not to intrude on anything, but...do you guys have room for one more? To join the club, I mean.
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  #3289    
Old December 3rd, 2012 (08:46 AM). Edited December 3rd, 2012 by Shining Raichu.
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Of course there is, Minato! Welcome! The more the merrier :D - please, tell us a bit about yourself!

Also just to let y'all know, I'm back. I moved house last week and we didn't have internet at my new place so I was out of commission for a good ten days. Anyway HUGELY long story short, we got evicted and I'm back living at home which means internet again yay!

The interesting thing was though that I moved in for that ten days with two gay guys (as per my coming out story a few pages back) and we're gonna get another place more... legitimately and move in together again . I had my first taste of being in the "gay community" as it were and I have to say it's not half bad! They were nerdy guys too so it's not like I have to worry about doing ghastly things like going out clubbing - but I like that I could sort of have my cake and eat it too, in that I get to step out but also remain relatively within my comfort zone.

But anyway, there is way too much for me to try to catch up on at this point (especially at nearly 4am) so I'm just gonna say welcome to Sassy Milkshake and LaVida, who also joined while I was gone, and try to jump right back into the conversation

Carry on!
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  #3290    
Old December 3rd, 2012 (09:13 AM).
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Well, there's not really all that much to tell. I suppose I'm bi, since I don't really care about gender. I'll date who I want.

And I'm sorry to hear that, Raichu. Hopefully, things will be looking up for you soon. I've got my fingers crossed for you.
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  #3291    
Old December 3rd, 2012 (12:11 PM).
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Quote originally posted by TornZero:
What I don't get is that trans*ism is typically considered worse than being homosexual. Why wouldn't someone pick the lesser of two evils? This is especially odd knowing that homosexuality is becoming much more widespread as an accepted thing.
Well, a trans person can be in a heterosexual relationship, and I can see how that might seem "better" to an outsider who doesn't realize that gay and trans aren't the same thing. Like, if they thought that a trans person was just a gay person trying to hide their ~shameful gayness~ then they might think it would be better to hide it at least and pretend to be in a straight relationship? Or something? They'd probably don't think very hard about what it would actually be like to be trans vs being gay though. After all, it's unnerving to lots of people to think, even for a moment, about life outside of their heteronormative lives so their powers of imagination in this area aren't going to be very well developed.
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  #3292    
Old December 3rd, 2012 (12:59 PM).
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Sassy Milkshake Sassy Milkshake is offline
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Quote originally posted by Scarf:
Like, if they thought that a trans person was just a gay person trying to hide their ~shameful gayness~ then they might think it would be better to hide it at least and pretend to be in a straight relationship? Or something? They'd probably don't think very hard about what it would actually be like to be trans vs being gay though.
See that's what I don't get though. If someone thinks that being gay is "shameful," would I be wrong to assume they'd feel the same way about being trans?

But you hit it on the head. They don't exactly think about these sort of things, because they don't need to.
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  #3293    
Old December 7th, 2012 (07:23 AM).
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I think that's a common case of mistaking gender identity and sexuality as the same thing, when they're in fact two very different animals. This is the one problem with lumping us all in together in the one community - it's pretty practical in just about every other way, but it makes it difficult for people to see it as two separate things.
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  #3294    
Old December 7th, 2012 (11:36 AM).
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So, I was wondering, do you guys know any TV shows, games or movies in which one of the protagonists is gay/bi/trans etc.? (And I don't mean yaoi, yuri or the like.)

For example, I've never really seen a video game where one of the characters seemed to be gay. You always have straight couples which I find kind of boring sometimes. Well, I guess this is due to the great amount of people who don't accept homosexuality but who knows... There might still be exceptions.
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  #3295    
Old December 7th, 2012 (12:13 PM).
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Sassy Milkshake Sassy Milkshake is offline
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Quote originally posted by LaVida:
So, I was wondering, do you guys know any TV shows, games or movies in which one of the protagonists is gay/bi/trans etc.? (And I don't mean yaoi, yuri or the like.)

For example, I've never really seen a video game where one of the characters seemed to be gay. You always have straight couples which I find kind of boring sometimes. Well, I guess this is due to the great amount of people who don't accept homosexuality but who knows... There might still be exceptions.
The only one I can think of is a TV show, Pretty Little Liars. One of the four girls is gay. I'm sure there are tons of other examples, but I don't watch that much TV or play that many games anyways.
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  #3296    
Old December 7th, 2012 (12:28 PM).
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Whoa! News! (sorry I'm cutting into the conversation again)

The U.S. Supreme Court has decided to take up Prop 8 (the ban against gay marriage in California) and DOMA (the so-called Defense of Marriage Act which bans that federal government from recognizing same-sex marriages). Several things could happen:

- They could rule against the bans, but only inasmuch as they would say that you can't take away a right once it was given (in California we had same-sex marriage for a short while in a few places before Prop 8) or that it's up to states to decide how to handle this, striking down DOMA but leaving all the bans in over 30 states.

- They could rule that bans on same-sex marriage are just flat-out unconstitutional and all the bans would go away. Same-sex marriage would be legal everywhere.

- They could also rule in favor of the bans, even possibly taking away the right to marry in those states that already have laws saying it's okay.

- They could do something really unexpected and surprising that does something completely different.

But in any case it'll probably be months and months before they even start hearing arguments.
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  #3297    
Old December 7th, 2012 (01:17 PM).
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I've been looking into this topic a bit more extensively as of late (still have no clue about some of it though haha). Anyways, I've always been under the impression that it was more of a cascade effect. Once some states legalized same-sex marriage, it'd only be a matter of time before the country fell in suit. I guess I was blind to the idea that this could be taken away from states even where it is legal. So not only could there be no progress forward, there's a possibility a couple steps could be taken backwards.

Nevertheless I think federal action is definitely news that is welcome. Albeit it might take awhile, stuff'll eventually have to happen. ;P
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Old December 7th, 2012 (01:31 PM).
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UK news!

David Cameron (Prime Minister) has announced that he doesn't want the gay community excluded from faith groups, and will be fighting for the permission of gay marriages (leaving the decisions to each individual priest/whatever).

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-politics-20642428
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  #3299    
Old December 7th, 2012 (04:15 PM).
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The DOMA and Prop 8 news makes my day even if it's far off. There's a chance for same sex marriage to be nation wide in the USA! Though, they're speculating that they will remove the ban in California but not extend it throughout the entire country. Also, that they'll strike down DOMA since three different cases ruled it unconstitutional for three different reasons. These are just speculations (of course) and anything could happen really but I'll definitely be watching this stuff closely.
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  #3300    
Old December 7th, 2012 (10:32 PM).
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I stopped reading about politics a long time ago. I always get so angry whenever I do. *sigh*

On the other hand, this is very intriguing. I might just follow this very closely, provided I don't explode with rage like all those other times.
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