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  #3576    
Old April 9th, 2013 (2:58 PM).
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Ausaudriel Ausaudriel is offline
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Quote originally posted by Insomniac:
Like I always think about how the guy's lips would feel, and I always think they'd feel cold and gross because he is a guy. That is just how gay I am right there.
Haha, it's so funny that you say that. I used to think the same way--that kissing a girl would be gross and sticky and like bubblegum fruity soft weird grossness. The idea completely repulsed me.

Then I accidentally kissed a friend of mine while slightly drunk and she totally wasn't that bad. *shrug*

Still, it was very reassuring as to why I'm gay.

Quote originally posted by QuilavaKing:
I've always thought of gay couples as having much more pure/innocent relationships, because I have they have to overcome all these extra challenges to be together, and so their love must be much stronger than a straight person who can just go bang whoever they want without having to worry about it. I'm sure that's not really true in the real world, but I can dream can't I?
I actually think gay men are in general more promiscuous than average. Comparing my relationships with those of my friends (all of my friends are straight) it seems way easier for me to find guys willing to just have sex. I think it's because men in general are more sexual creatures (or more ruled/controlled by their sexual natures) and so when you take two male sex drives and put them together, well... yeah.

Can't say much for lesbians though. No idea. All I know, and don't take offense, is my one lesbian friend has a joke about how lesbian women always bring a U-Haul to the second date. :x Lol. Implying that they get attached really quickly and move in together and what not.

Quote originally posted by Scarf:
... unless you live in San Francisco. No, I mean it. My friend who lived there for a while has told me a whole lot about some of the things that go on there when you know where to go and who to talk to. Like bars that have a weekly underwear night.
San Francisco is my favorite city in the states. 8) Not because of the gay community (which I'm actually rather distasteful of), but because it's so open and accepting of everything in general. The vibes there are just so great.

I live in Los Angeles and people here are all about what they can gain from knowing you. It's mostly because of the industry, all of the people moving out here to "make it big" who've heard that it's all about "who you know," so when they meet you they think, "I wonder if he can get me an acting job..." or "I wonder if he knows any producers..." etc. etc.

San Francisco people were just genuinely nice. It was a refreshing change. I really wanna move there this summer, get the heck out of LA.

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Old April 9th, 2013 (3:18 PM).
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FenrirDarkWolf FenrirDarkWolf is offline
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I have told exactly one person in my family that I was bisexual.
She explained to me something I already know that, everyone's just a little bit bi, in that, you see a nice looking girl and be like, "Damn! She fine!" and then you see a nice looking guy, "Mmmhmm!" And then be we got into one of our weird talks.
You all understand?
Anyway, I didn't tell her anymore of the juicy bits like my boyfriend.

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Old April 9th, 2013 (3:22 PM).
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Quote originally posted by FenrirDarkWolf:
I have told exactly one person in my family that I was bisexual.
She explained to me something I already know that, everyone's just a little bit bi, in that, you see a nice looking girl and be like, "Damn! She fine!" and then you see a nice looking guy, "Mmmhmm!" And then be we got into one of our weird talks.
You all understand?
Anyway, I didn't tell her anymore of the juicy bits like my boyfriend.

It's kinda like when I tell a new friend I'm lesbian. They usually say something like 'wait so girls are attractive to you?' "yep" 'soo you like girls.' "yep" 'how bout that one' "not necessarily all girls" 'or that one' "um" and they just point out girls because they assume I think every dang girl is cute. At least that's the kind of weird talk I get.

  #3579    
Old April 9th, 2013 (3:30 PM).
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Quote originally posted by Insomniac:
It's kinda like when I tell a new friend I'm lesbian. They usually say something like 'wait so girls are attractive to you?' "yep" 'soo you like girls.' "yep" 'how bout that one' "not necessarily all girls" 'or that one' "um" and they just point out girls because they assume I think every dang girl is cute. At least that's the kind of weird talk I get.

Nahh, my weird talk with my grandma is like looking in Wikipedia or TV Tropes.
We start on one topic, then we get to another, then another, then another.
Like, we started on the TV, then something, then, I asked her how she was since she just got out of the hospital, and, we got to the female reproductive system, then it went to my love life, and then my mom showed up and it all went crazy from there!

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Old April 9th, 2013 (5:20 PM).
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Quote originally posted by Radio Rebel:

Talking about porn on a Pokémon forum. Because why the hell not? :P

Believe me, it's not the first time. It's actually been a fairly popular topic around these parts. lol

  #3581    
Old April 9th, 2013 (7:38 PM). Edited April 9th, 2013 by Somniac.
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I guess I should probably sign up to this, to be honest I had no idea this thread existed until I found it just now.

Quote originally posted by Insomniac:
It's kinda like when I tell a new friend I'm lesbian. They usually say something like 'wait so girls are attractive to you?' "yep" 'soo you like girls.' "yep" 'how bout that one' "not necessarily all girls" 'or that one' "um" and they just point out girls because they assume I think every dang girl is cute. At least that's the kind of weird talk I get.

I've had that exact same talk, during high-school I told my best friend I was lesbian [at the time I thought I was, turns out i'm bi though - Boy did that whole situation confuse me.]

When I told her she basically named every girl in out year saying 'What about ___, do you think she's cute?'

Apart from her and a select few others, everyone else just tried to bully me, but hey; kids are *******s right?

Nowadays if someone asks me my sexuality I just say i'm greedy and can't choose

Quote originally posted by QuilavaKing:
I've always preferred either guy/guy or girl/girl, not a fan of straight porn at all... I guess that makes sense, being bisexual?

I've always thought of gay couples as having much more pure/innocent relationships, because I have they have to overcome all these extra challenges to be together, and so their love must be much stronger than a straight person who can just go bang whoever they want without having to worry about it. I'm sure that's not really true in the real world, but I can dream can't I?

Actually, banging anyone you want without having to worry about it is the best part about being bi.
That makes me sound like a bad person. I'm completely monogamous, I swear.

Quote originally posted by PhantomX0990:

But family is another story. My parents... yeah.

First, my father. He has a temper. A very strong temper, one that I had issues with growing up and is the reason I was more than happy to quit college and move out at eighteen. He is very against anything, I repeat ANYTHING having to do with LGBT. They have a very nice lesbian couple living across the street. Very nice people. The things he says about them though... I think I have scars on my tongue from biting it.

My mother... knows. Or at least she should know that I am not exactly straight. I think most people here know my 'coming out story'; if it could be called that. She is in denial. Has been for years. She will not speak of it. Worst part is... she loves kids. She wanted a big family, but she had cancer and could not have more kids, leaving her with just me. She's always ranting about how much she wants grandchildren. She even goes to joke that I should just 'find a guy' and then she'd take care of the child. I'm not joking. Yes, I see it's wrong too, but there's a sadness to it. Thing is... it's not exactly the easiest thing in the world for a same sex couple to have kids... at least I'm pretty sure biology doesn't work like that. I think this is what would devestate her the most. (Yes I know there are other ways, but you know what I'm talking about.)

I know what your going through. My father was/is incredibly 'outspoken' [to put it nicely] or bigoted to put it accurately. He basically called me scum and threw me out when I came out to my parents, and I haven't spoken to him properly in a few years.

That said; I do understand his points of view, as I'm his only daughter and he basically has no chance of grand-children if I don't provide them. My mother speaks to me occasionally but she doesn't approve of my choice of partner.

Luckily my partners family is loverly, accepting and welcoming. I spend a lot of time with them and they've become a more supporting family that my biological one. It seems a horrible situation but I've come to accept it. You should never try to change to please other people, ESPECIALLY family members.

However, don't be over-eager to flaunt your sexuality if it could cause you harm, a little disgression is easily worth your safety and health.

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  #3582    
Old April 9th, 2013 (8:53 PM).
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Jasper Jasper is offline
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Quote originally posted by Somniac:
I guess I should probably sign up to this, to be honest I had no idea this thread existed until I found it just now.

I've had that exact same talk, during high-school I told my best friend I was lesbian [at the time I thought I was, turns out i'm bi though - Boy did that whole situation confuse me.]

When I told her she basically named every girl in out year saying 'What about ___, do you think she's cute?'

Apart from her and a select few others, everyone else just tried to bully me, but hey; kids are *******s right?

Nowadays if someone asks me my sexuality I just say i'm greedy and can't choose

Ahaha yeah I'm sure all the raptors (lesbians) get the "is shhheeee cute? is shhheee cute? what about her?" talk eventually. :p

The only difference here is that in HS I am not bullied. People know I'm gay and they don't care, they're pro gay so it's cool.

  #3583    
Old April 9th, 2013 (10:28 PM).
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Alice Alice is offline
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Quote originally posted by Somniac:
I was lesbian [at the time I thought I was, turns out i'm bi though - Boy did that whole situation confuse me.]
I did the exact same thing... I thought I must be the only person to come out as gay when I'm really bi, but I guess not, lol. It's usually the other way around. My parents actually still think I'm gay... and it's somehow harder to tell them that I'm not gay than it was to tell them that I am, lol. I feel bad about not telling them though, because I'm sure it would be good news to them, but I just haven't found a good chance.

  #3584    
Old April 10th, 2013 (2:54 AM).
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FenrirDarkWolf FenrirDarkWolf is offline
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I think I might be gayer than I thought I was...
i.e.
The exact situation you guys were in, but reversed.

Or maybe I'm just 15, horny, and really wanting my boyfriend with me.

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  #3585    
Old April 10th, 2013 (11:29 AM).
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Esper Esper is offline
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Quote originally posted by Ausaudriel:
I actually think gay men are in general more promiscuous than average. Comparing my relationships with those of my friends (all of my friends are straight) it seems way easier for me to find guys willing to just have sex. I think it's because men in general are more sexual creatures (or more ruled/controlled by their sexual natures) and so when you take two male sex drives and put them together, well... yeah.

Can't say much for lesbians though. No idea. All I know, and don't take offense, is my one lesbian friend has a joke about how lesbian women always bring a U-Haul to the second date. :x Lol. Implying that they get attached really quickly and move in together and what not.

San Francisco is my favorite city in the states. 8) Not because of the gay community (which I'm actually rather distasteful of), but because it's so open and accepting of everything in general. The vibes there are just so great.

I live in Los Angeles and people here are all about what they can gain from knowing you. It's mostly because of the industry, all of the people moving out here to "make it big" who've heard that it's all about "who you know," so when they meet you they think, "I wonder if he can get me an acting job..." or "I wonder if he knows any producers..." etc. etc.

San Francisco people were just genuinely nice. It was a refreshing change. I really wanna move there this summer, get the heck out of LA.

So the full joke goes: What do lesbians bring on a second date? A U-Haul. Then you follow up with: What do gay men bring on a second date? What second date?

One of my roommates in college dated a girl for a short while and they ended up living together after not very long and then breaking up before the end of the year. They both came from areas of southern California (Kern county and Los Angeles county) where they were from a small town and a strict Asian family respectively so they'd both been in the closet through high school so when they started dating it was all fireworks and lightning and they thought they'd found their soul mates.

Quote originally posted by FenrirDarkWolf:
I think I might be gayer than I thought I was...
i.e.
The exact situation you guys were in, but reversed.

Or maybe I'm just 15, horny, and really wanting my boyfriend with me.

Well, that happens to a lot of us. Long distance relationships aren't easy.

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  #3586    
Old April 10th, 2013 (1:48 PM).
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Cassino Cassino is offline
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Quote originally posted by Insomniac:
It's kinda like when I tell a new friend I'm lesbian. They usually say something like 'wait so girls are attractive to you?' "yep" 'soo you like girls.' "yep" 'how bout that one' "not necessarily all girls" 'or that one' "um" and they just point out girls because they assume I think every dang girl is cute. At least that's the kind of weird talk I get.
I once got "does being asexual mean you're actually bi?".
The question is actually quite reasonable; in the same way that one isn't necessarily completely hetero/homo/etc., one isn't necessarily completely asexual.

Quote originally posted by Somniac:
Actually, banging anyone you want without having to worry about it is the best part about being bi.
That makes me sound like a bad person. I'm completely monogamous, I swear.
Nothing wrong with polyamory, provided the consent of all participants.

  #3587    
Old April 10th, 2013 (3:28 PM).
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Melody Melody is offline

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Quote originally posted by Cassino:
I once got "does being asexual mean you're actually bi?".
The question is actually quite reasonable; in the same way that one isn't necessarily completely hetero/homo/etc., one isn't necessarily completely asexual.

Nothing wrong with polyamory, provided the consent of all participants.

Wow. That's a new one. Confusing Bisexual with Asexual?

But bisexuality has some weird and very unfair stereotypes unfortunately...like people jump straight into thinking we're polyamorous, when that couldn't be further from the truth. Same goes for Pansexual too, except you get some even stupider assumptions, sometimes couched as jokes. X3

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  #3588    
Old April 10th, 2013 (5:57 PM).
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Quote originally posted by Pachy:
Wow. That's a new one. Confusing Bisexual with Asexual?

But bisexuality has some weird and very unfair stereotypes unfortunately...like people jump straight into thinking we're polyamorous, when that couldn't be further from the truth. Same goes for Pansexual too, except you get some even stupider assumptions, sometimes couched as jokes. X3

Speaking of pansexual..

I am not trying to offend anyone here, but really, it seems like a lot of people use pansexual when they are bi just to sound more sophisticated.

  #3589    
Old April 10th, 2013 (6:28 PM). Edited April 10th, 2013 by Melody.
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Quote originally posted by Insomniac:
Speaking of pansexual..

I am not trying to offend anyone here, but really, it seems like a lot of people use pansexual when they are bi just to sound more sophisticated.

No. Common misconception. Pansexual is simply accepting of all gender identities, be they binary or not. Bisexual implies that you stick to the binary adhering folks.

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Old April 10th, 2013 (8:30 PM).
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Alice Alice is offline
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I thought pansexual was the same as gender blindness, meaning that you have literally no preference of sex or gender. By your definition I would be pansexual... but I think that's actually closer to being polysexual, isn't it?

  #3591    
Old April 11th, 2013 (12:44 AM).
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Melody Melody is offline

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Quote originally posted by QuilavaKing:
I thought pansexual was the same as gender blindness, meaning that you have literally no preference of sex or gender. By your definition I would be pansexual... but I think that's actually closer to being polysexual, isn't it?

Basically yes that's what it boils down to in simpler terms.

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Old April 11th, 2013 (3:14 AM).
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Quote originally posted by Pachy:
Wow. That's a new one. Confusing Bisexual with Asexual?
I don't think it was confusing the two, just thinking that liking neither gives me no particular inclination to either sex, ergo if I were sexual I would like both, or perhaps more accurately be pansexual. I had actually pondered this myself before the question came up.

  #3593    
Old April 11th, 2013 (9:36 AM).
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When you move into the territory of "if I were actually..." there's a lot of room for confusion between people. It's already complicated enough sometimes explaining to someone.

Reminds me of that video with the infographics I posted a while back. I really liked how it could convey clearly something rather complicated without watering it down.

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  #3594    
Old April 11th, 2013 (10:32 AM).
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Kanzler Kanzler is offline
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I think the distinctions are a bit too technical and nuanced for most people's needs or understanding. I'm not too sure on this, but they may have started out for academic purposes, because social scientists classify and categorize and identify and stuff. It kinda feels sometimes that there's so much emphasis on getting the label right that in the very act of doing it you're making confusion.

I say forget the labels and just do your own thing.

  #3595    
Old April 11th, 2013 (2:52 PM).
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Gyardosamped Gyardosamped is offline
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Quote originally posted by BlahISuck:
I think the distinctions are a bit too technical and nuanced for most people's needs or understanding. I'm not too sure on this, but they may have started out for academic purposes, because social scientists classify and categorize and identify and stuff. It kinda feels sometimes that there's so much emphasis on getting the label right that in the very act of doing it you're making confusion.

I say forget the labels and just do your own thing.

I agree. There are so many labels and they're all so confusing as it is, at least to me. I guess that's why the majority of the population only really knows about the major ones (gay, bi, lesbian, etc.) because the other ones are just so complex. :p

Also, can DOMA just be dropped already! GOSHHHH.

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Old April 12th, 2013 (9:17 AM).
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Cassino Cassino is offline
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Quote originally posted by BlahISuck:
I say forget the labels and just do your own thing.
I like labels; it's much easier to say what I am in one or a few words... and that's the point of language, having words for things, conveying ideas, efficiently if possible. Telling someone I'm asexual and leaving it at that conveniently tells them the answer to what their question is ultimately getting at: "no, we probably won't mate". (I'm not saying everyone who asks of another's sexuality is pointedly out to mate with them, though — it just becomes a reference point in case the matter should become relevant.) It probably just helps my case that my chosen identity is obscure enough that people don't have any particular assumptions about it.

  #3597    
Old April 12th, 2013 (11:24 AM).
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Melody Melody is offline

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Labels when applied properly and used in the correct context oftentimes do serve a function. But one must be aware of the potential interpretations of the label and sometimes it is necessary to explain something to discourage a misunderstanding.

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Old April 12th, 2013 (12:30 PM).
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Kanzler Kanzler is offline
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Labels apply clarity, that's for sure. But people's identities, biologies, and behaviour occur along a spectrum. So while labels are convenient for you, it might be inconvenient to someone - even with a similar experience - because they feel boxed in by a single word. My experience, fortunately enough, can be explained on the binary and is stable but labels imply stability. If a person has an orientation that moves around I don't think that a prefix-sexual would be very useful to them.

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  #3599    
Old April 12th, 2013 (1:55 PM).
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Kiriyuuki Kasuna Kiriyuuki Kasuna is offline

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Quote originally posted by Cassino:
I once got "does being asexual mean you're actually bi?".
The question is actually quite reasonable; in the same way that one isn't necessarily completely hetero/homo/etc., one isn't necessarily completely asexual.

Nothing wrong with polyamory, provided the consent of all participants.

Wow first, it's been so long since my intro post here, gotta be up in dem times!

And 2nd,

Asexual means that you are not attracted to either sex, sexually and romantically , but you can still have a crush on either sex though.

Bisexual means simply that you are attracted to both sex, sexually and romantically. It goes towards both looks and personality of the person, and at times you can fall in love and have a crush on both sex at the same time too.

@Pachy: YAY ZOMG!!! :D I know you posted 1 week ago, but, I'm still really proud of you and am happy for you girl! <3

Lastly, LABELS ARE FOR SQUARES!~

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  #3600    
Old April 12th, 2013 (3:55 PM).
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Quote originally posted by Twihiki_Amias:
Bisexual means simply that you are attracted to both sex, sexually and romantically. It goes towards both looks and personality of the person, and at times you can fall in love and have a crush on both sex at the same time too.

I know how that feels.
I once fell for a guy, and his younger sister...

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